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Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Judgmental
You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.
50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Today, I walked in on my sister plucking her nipples. A shame I didn't get a big fuck-off bottle of brain bleach for Christmas. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19451) - you deserved it (5212)
On 12/25/2012 at 8:49pm - intimacy - by FuckMyEyes (man) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, after giving my mother and my girlfriend their Christmas presents, I realized just how similar they looked both in box size and wrapping paper. I noticed after my mother gasped upon finding a vibrator in her box. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12586) - you deserved it (35219)
On 12/25/2012 at 2:12am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my boyfriend and I were having Christmas dinner while his mom was away. I was lying alone on his bed while he did the dishes, when the bedroom door dramatically swung open and his mom glared at me from the doorway. I had to leave when she screamed "FORNICATION IS A SIN!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (27718) - you deserved it (3178)
On 12/25/2012 at 1:41am - love - by un_christmas - Malaysia (Kuala Lumpur)
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. I felt down, so I laid in bed and told my parents I needed some alone time. A couple of minutes later, one of them started blasting "All by Myself" so loud that I felt the floorboards vibrate. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28712) - you deserved it (3219)
On 12/25/2012 at 12:00am - love - by all by myself - United States (Alaska)
Today, my 14-year-old daughter came home after sneaking out and partying. She was totally drunk, and started crying on my shoulder because some boy named "Thomas" has a small dick, and she had to fake an orgasm. FML
I agree, your life sucks (64021) - you deserved it (15778)
On 12/24/2012 at 10:03pm - intimacy - by valnaj1 (woman) - Denmark (Syddanmark)
Today, my friend put my phone number on Craigslist. I still can't find the ad, but obviously everyone else can because I still haven't stopped receiving naked pictures. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27324) - you deserved it (2576)
On 12/24/2012 at 4:06pm - misc - by Chanman1924 - United States
Today, my boyfriend ended sex by yelling, "THIS IS SPARTA!" and using his foot to push me off the bed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44582) - you deserved it (7275)
On 12/23/2012 at 11:55pm - intimacy - by Saradee (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my boyfriend is seriously mad at me for telling his cat what he got it for Christmas. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26900) - you deserved it (5890)
On 12/23/2012 at 3:24am - animals - by Kate (woman) - United States (Missouri)
Today, I told my husband to tell me his wildest fantasy. He told me it was to put on fake antlers and "do it like deer". FML
I agree, your life sucks (25709) - you deserved it (4879)
On 12/23/2012 at 1:19am - intimacy - by Kasey Eames - United States (California)
Today, a friend informed me that my dog's name means "penis" in Greek. I live in a predominantly Greek neighbourhood, and apparently I've been screaming for "dong" every evening for the past 3 years. No wonder they don't talk to me much. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25187) - you deserved it (7590)
On 12/18/2012 at 10:30am - misc - by Dog_Lover (woman) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, my pregnant girlfriend gave me back the ring I'd used to propose with a week ago. Her reason? She only said yes because she was worried the real father of the baby wasn't going to stick around. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31633) - you deserved it (272)
On 12/05/2012 at 5:52am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, my husband discovered poking me in my belly button makes me have to pee, sometimes it's uncontrollable and happens immediately. He thinks it's hilarious and decided it's his new favorite game. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19227) - you deserved it (1731)
On 12/01/2012 at 12:01pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I tried to motivate my 9-year-old sister to clean her room. She said she'd only agree if she could kill me. Thinking she was just kidding around, and not a total psychopath, I said sure. She ran to her room shouting, "Yes! I'm gonna use the big knife!" She's still cleaning now. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17980) - you deserved it (3706)
On 11/21/2012 at 2:34pm - kids - by anon - United Kingdom (London, City of)
Today, a nearby volcano erupted for the second time. We were all urged to keep our windows and doors closed in case of ash clouds. My father responded by opening every window and door and shouting, "Come at me, bro!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (19405) - you deserved it (1470)
On 11/20/2012 at 11:50pm - misc - by vanillatwilight2 (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)
Today, my dad asked me to send my mom a text since he was driving and I was in the passenger seat. I pulled up my mom's contact on his phone, and I found that my mom had recently sent my dad a picture of her jugs, along with the message, "We miss you." FML
I agree, your life sucks (21060) - you deserved it (1541)
On 11/15/2012 at 9:45pm - love - by Sexting Parents - United States (New Jersey)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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