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samiel1989

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samiel1989
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 900
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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samiel1989's last visitors

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samiel1989's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of samiel1989's badges

samiel1989's favorite FMLs

Today, my "friend" put itching powder in my cast while I was sleeping. FML

#14897237
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28048) - you deserved it (2150)

On 02/08/2011 at 4:39pm - health - by scratchy -

Today, I was dry-walling a house when my butt started to itch. I bent over to scratch it on a piece of plywood, at which point the client's wife walked in and asked what the fuck I was doing. FML

#14892103
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7609) - you deserved it (25866)

On 02/08/2011 at 2:58am - work - by Shane -

Today, my 400 pound roommate brought home a 400 pound guy. Now there's 800 pounds of sex going on in the next room, and it sounds like the invasion of Normandy in there. FML

#14835077
271 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67083) - you deserved it (6317)

On 02/04/2011 at 12:42am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my brother and father thought it would be a good idea to wake me up by turning on a chainsaw and wearing hockey masks. FML

#14753442
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29660) - you deserved it (3868)

On 01/29/2011 at 2:29am - misc - by unlucky dudebag - United States (California)

Today, while skiing, I really needed to pee. The instructor pointed me towards some bushes. I slid over to them, and pulled my panties down. My skis then started sliding back down the slope. I ended up gliding through the bushes, all the way down to the rest of the group. FML

#14670797
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25123) - you deserved it (6956) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/22/2011 at 3:49am - misc - by sandra22 - Sent from mobile version

Today, my girlfriend was giving me a hand job. As I reached my climax, she thought it would be funny to turn my 'weapon' against me. Boom, headshot. FML

#14610613
241 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38062) - you deserved it (25746) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 4:53am - intimacy - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, when I went to pick my kid up from daycare, I found out that he had run away. The rest of my afternoon consisted of me screaming his name, looking for him. I then returned to the daycare center. He thought it would be funny if he hid in the trash. FML

#14560893
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26163) - you deserved it (3092)

On 01/12/2011 at 11:42pm - kids - by tatortot7707 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I saw my first boobs ever, at 18, volunteering at a retirement home. FML

#14306986
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36441) - you deserved it (6868)

On 12/23/2010 at 3:18am - intimacy - by David H. -

Today, I realized that the fish-shaped birth mark on the back of my leg, that I have had all my life, is not really shaped like a fish as I had originally thought. It looks just like a penis. FML

#14234557
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22656) - you deserved it (2299)

On 12/17/2010 at 11:23am - health - by BYUwildchild - United States

Today, while playing soccer, I was kicked so hard in the shin that my tibia snapped. The snap was so loud that even the audience heard. As we waited for an ambulance, my mom started yelling for me to get off the field so the game could continue. FML

Today, while my boyfriend and I were fighting in the car, I paused to take a bite of my burrito. Just at that moment, he slammed on the brakes, causing me to deepthroat my burrito. I threw up all over myself. He won the argument. FML

#13648057
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26080) - you deserved it (7555)

On 10/30/2010 at 9:40am - love - by serendipity1027 - Sent from mobile version

Today, my friend asked me how I did on my test. I got an 85%. She asked me what my secret was, and I said "I'm just smart". She replied, "No you're not. How did you pull it off?" FML

#13366496
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19018) - you deserved it (5411)

On 10/08/2010 at 2:33pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I started my first day at a new hospital. My first assignment? Shave an elderly man's testicles. FML

#13333152
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30423) - you deserved it (3987)

On 10/05/2010 at 7:36pm - work - by hospital - United States (New York)

Today, I was in the bathroom stall when a man made eye-contact with me through the cracks. I quickly looked away, and about a minute later I looked back to see if he was gone. He was still there and was actually trying to keep making eye-contact with me while I pooped. FML

#13202314
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30472) - you deserved it (2299)

On 09/25/2010 at 11:00pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I was applying Icy Hot. I squeezed the bottle too hard making it squirt in my eye. I ran to the bathroom in agony, turned on the faucet, and slammed my face right into it. FML

#12887269
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26549) - you deserved it (6081)

On 09/03/2010 at 3:59pm - health - by Jesska (woman) - United States (New York)



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