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saksxalmo

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saksxalmo
  • Town/Country : U.S.A.
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 3 January 1996 (18 years)
  • Number of visits : 2252
  • Number of comments : 562
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About saksxalmo : Me: linguaster, oneironaut, and pedantic extraordinaire!

My name: "Saksxalmo" is the little-known Esperanto word for bagpipes. It's pronounced as "sack SHALM o." You learn something every day! :)

Please, tell me more about how the fact that I'm a teenager or a girl or American makes me stupid. No one expects you to use a real argument anyway.

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An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

I never take things to heart

Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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saksxalmo's favorite FMLs

Today, before I went into surgery, the patient next to me just finished the same procedure I was going to get. As he woke up in the recovery area 10 feet away, I was getting my final prep before the operation. On my way into the operating room I was comforted by his screams of agonizing pain. FML

Today, as part of my medical anatomy course, I had to give a presentation about an STD and the effects it has on women. The class was comprised almost entirely of girls. I become extremely anxious and accidentally stated "Vaginas are smelly" as my opening statement. FML

#19637447
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12996) - you deserved it (23310)

On 05/17/2012 at 4:14pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, it was my birthday. I was heading back to my apartment and I heard noises inside the door. Assuming it was the surprise party I'd hinted at, I flicked on the lights as two heavy guys pushed past me. I was robbed. FML

#19604267
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27091) - you deserved it (1698)

On 05/10/2012 at 8:28pm - money - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I had to get a prostate exam. Right before the doctor started, he told me that if I found it awkward at all, I should just imagine I was being probed by aliens. FML

#19603388
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18545) - you deserved it (1833)

On 05/10/2012 at 5:22pm - health - by Jesse (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, my wife made my hand bleed by stabbing it with a fork. I'd only tried to take some fries from her plate. FML

#19595631
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12857) - you deserved it (26002) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 05/08/2012 at 11:48pm - misc - by Mouhahaa (man) - France

Today, I asked my dad why there were no photos of me on the wall. He replied, "Every time you disappoint us we burn one." FML

#19586113
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27524) - you deserved it (4463)

On 05/07/2012 at 5:51am - misc - by N (woman) - United Kingdom (Glasgow City)

Today, my turtle, who had a little portion of the garden all to herself, died. My 5-year-old nephew wanted to "be like Mario" by jumping on her. FML

#19576176
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32587) - you deserved it (2059) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 05/05/2012 at 6:06am - kids - by Grindyloo -

Today, an exchange student was telling us how he once used a black light to detect semen stains on his "abstinent" ex-girlfriend's face. I called him out on the obvious lie, saying it's an old urban legend. He wigged out, screamed that I'm a "bastarding shite-wank" and ran out of class. FML

#19573864
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17442) - you deserved it (4518)

On 05/04/2012 at 5:53pm - intimacy - by Garry (man) - United States

Today, I sarcastically pointed out a book to my mom, titled "Living Successfully With Screwed Up People." She already has it. FML

#19568451
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14509) - you deserved it (3188)

On 05/03/2012 at 1:45pm - misc - by screwedupkid -

Today, to avoid looking like a loser in front of his friends who all have girlfriends, my brother made up a perfect relationship. He asked me to give him a hickey in exchange for 50 euros. Our parents walked in on us. FML

#19561833
328 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11264) - you deserved it (38064) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 05/02/2012 at 1:06am - love - by Flip (woman) - France (Rhone-Alpes)

Today, I was grounded by my mom because I had slept in past 11, when she wanted me to wake up at seven to do chores. According to her logic, I should have seen the note she left on the counter earlier this morning. FML

#19545380
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24494) - you deserved it (2464)

On 04/28/2012 at 11:55pm - misc - by thyisnothorses - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, as I was crossing an intersection, a car ran a red light and almost hit me. This kind of thing happens a lot in my town so I'm used to almost being run-down, except this time it was a small boy on his father's lap steering. The dad was laughing. FML

#19531313
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21941) - you deserved it (1489)

On 04/26/2012 at 7:49am - misc - by Diffy - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, it was snowing, and the campus looked just lovely. I sat on a nearby window ledge to enjoy the view. I was joined by a girl who looked fascinated as well, so I decided to make small talk. She nodded, smiled wistfully, and said, "There's herpes in the air today." FML

#19525973
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17611) - you deserved it (1849)

On 04/25/2012 at 2:22am - intimacy - by intheairtonight (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I introduced my Spanish friend to a girl I've had a crush on for a long time. Because he only spoke Spanish and she only spoke English, I was the translator. The first thing he said to her was, "You are really pretty." I translated it as "I like other men." Later, they found out. FML

#19470748
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6944) - you deserved it (29629)

On 04/15/2012 at 2:49am - love - by needurlove (man) - United States (Idaho)

Today, my daughter sat me down for a long talk. It turns out that she thinks she is the Chosen One. FML



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