Search for a member

Offline (the 10/23/2016 at 11:17pm)



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 23 July 1991 (25 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2032
  • Number of comments : 151
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 10 posted

About safaeita : ^^

safaeita's page activity

Visits<b>psychocunt</b> - the 10/11/2016 at 2:12am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 08/12/2016 at 7:21am<b>Monday_funday</b> - the 08/10/2016 at 1:50pm<b>kokopuffs3</b> - the 07/18/2016 at 12:53am<b>IcedSapphire</b> - the 07/14/2016 at 4:01pm<b>RedCronos</b> - the 07/14/2016 at 3:21pm<b>yellow33</b> - the 01/31/2016 at 11:46pm<b>kzarecor2019</b> - the 11/02/2015 at 7:54pm<b>AZTEC_WARRIOR</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 7:28pm<b>lizbeth26</b> - the 06/20/2015 at 8:55am<b>invadermaythe1st</b> - the 03/03/2015 at 11:53am<b>amanda1472</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 2:23pm<b>LeavenSilva</b> - the 01/21/2015 at 12:50am<b>PurpleVixen</b> - the 01/13/2015 at 8:18am<b>dude_itskayley</b> - the 12/30/2014 at 1:22am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 12/26/2014 at 2:45pm<b>rocker_chick23</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 3:30pm<b>countryb_cth</b> - the 08/31/2014 at 5:01am

safaeita's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Keen reader – Level: godlike ninja

You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

The Thumb returns

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

See all of safaeita's badges

safaeita's favorite FMLs

Today, I was run over by my own car as I tried to push it out of a snowbank. FML

by drew / 12/18/2010 at 3:22pm / United States (Michigan) / Health

Today, at work, I handed an old man his drink, and our fingers accidentally brushed. He gave me a creepy wink and a smile, but I ignored it. He's now been sitting in the store for two hours watching me. Only 4 hours to go until I get off. FML

by Username / 11/23/2010 at 3:53pm / Work

Today, I decided to sleep in for 5 extra minutes. Those 5 extra minutes became 55 minutes, which, coincidentally, was roughly the length of the midterm I missed. FML

by Anonymous / 11/10/2010 at 11:32pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to sneeze really bad in a restaurant. To avoid sneezing on everybody's food, I turned my head to the side and sneezed, it just so happens a waitress was there serving a table. My nose went straight into her ass. FML

by Embarrassed / 10/01/2010 at 9:06am / United States / Health

Today, I went to visit my aunt who recently was released from an institution. She had leftover Christmas cookies so I began snacking on them. They tasted a bit off so I inquired about the ingredients. She told me they only had white icing so she used Crayola markers to give them color. FML

by Anonymous / 01/02/2010 at 8:33am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out my mom is getting rid of cable TV. My dad and I bought her a 700 dollar plasma screen TV for Christmas. FML

by Anonymous / 12/24/2009 at 2:45pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Money

Today, my boss called me into his office. He had a huge smile on his face, so I assumed I was going to get promoted. He then sat down, and told me that he had been sleeping with my wife for the last three months. He still had a huge smile on his face. FML

by smiletellsall / 08/06/2009 at 7:41pm / United States (California) / Work

Today, my sister thought it would be funny to spray my face with my new tanning spray, which is only supposed to be used on arms and legs. I woke up and looked in the mirror to see an orange blotchy face staring back at me. My parents can't look at me without laughing. FML

by blotchy-girl / 07/15/2009 at 12:00am / New Zealand (Auckland) / Miscellaneous

Today, I planned a romantic dinner with rose petals, the whole lot, for my ex-girlfriend to win her back. When I took her to my house I told her to guess what I had planned, to which she replied "I hope it's not a stupid romantic dinner with rose petals and shit." FML

by ipopnlok / 06/29/2009 at 2:31am / Australia (Victoria) / Love

Today, after buying the plane ticket to Glendale, CA to visit 17 year old Courtney who I met on a dating website, she called me for the first time to say that she was actually 19 year old Seth from Atlanta, GA. FML

by gabe8 / 06/15/2009 at 1:42am / Mexico (Nuevo Leon) / Love

Today, I had to water my entire garden. After an exhausting hour of watering hundreds of plants, I turned off the hose and started to feel good about the grueling job. That is, until it started pouring rain. FML

by Rainman / 06/14/2009 at 4:39pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was babysitting. I was sitting on the sofa when I felt that I need to ajust my sitting arangment. After moving, I felt a small toy snap under me. The little boy said it was fine. One hour later he snuck up on me and beat me with an umbrella for breaking his toy. FML

by KPKallery / 06/05/2009 at 1:25am / United States (Tennessee) / Kids

Today, I went for a hike with the local search and rescue volunteer group that I recently joined. I got lost and spent 5 hours wandering aimlessly. FML

by Wouldntitbeniceif / 04/30/2009 at 11:13pm / United States (New Mexico) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had a going-away party because I am leaving the country forever. Out of the 130 people invited, 60 were a resounding "Yes! of course I will go!". After paying $300 for everything needed at the party, 2 ended up coming. And left because nobody else was there. FML

by Anonymous / 04/25/2009 at 7:50pm / Brazil (Parana) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was studying for a midterm, so I put my computer on the side of my desk to make more room for my books. My roommate came in while I wasn't paying attention and tackle-hugged me from behind - I fell over, knocking my computer out the window. I live on the 8th floor. FML

by avanti / 04/24/2009 at 2:41am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous