Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

sacrosanct2

Offline (one hour ago) | Search for a member

sacrosanct2

7Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3346
  • Number of comments : 34
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About sacrosanct2 : Nothing is sacred

sacrosanct2's page activity

Visits<b>badmandilon</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 11:37pm<b>jerryj</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 6:11am<b>TysonHolgate</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 2:07pm<b>Queen_Bitch69</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 11:14am<b>lex1459</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 4:35am<b>Larissa24</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 4:33am<b>LittleRed79</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 12:32am<b>mommy2cassidy</b> - the 12/13/2014 at 10:49pm<b>quickit</b> - the 12/13/2014 at 8:01pm<b>alexmisty88</b> - the 11/25/2014 at 1:21am<b>sarah5745</b> - the 11/22/2014 at 10:18am<b>M_F06_25</b> - the 11/18/2014 at 9:58pm<b>wanted_2_want</b> - the 11/11/2014 at 1:09am<b>lkfldal</b> - the 11/06/2014 at 11:22pm<b>ODST_Panda</b> - the 11/04/2014 at 6:12pm<b>SirMiniHobbit</b> - the 11/04/2014 at 5:44am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 11/03/2014 at 5:08pm<b>cornyrob</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 7:05am

Liked!<b>Edogg215</b> - the 10/30/2014 at 9:10am<b>morondon000</b> - the 10/23/2014 at 8:19am<b>spockadelic</b> - the 10/22/2014 at 2:03am<b>wisesombrero</b> - the 10/20/2014 at 7:02pm<b>lkfldal</b> - the 10/20/2014 at 5:43am<b>RocketmanWelbz</b> - the 10/17/2014 at 9:35pm<b>Alicestraza</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 11:18am

sacrosanct2's FML badges

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of sacrosanct2's badges

sacrosanct2's favorite FMLs

Today, my brother was arrested for starting a fistfight at a funeral. He didn't even know the deceased; he's just been crashing funerals recently, hoping to hook up with mourners. I'm not sure who's more pathetic: him for doing such a thing, or me for bailing his fucking dumb arse out of jail. FML

#20509476
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29598) - you deserved it (6923)

On 02/16/2013 at 1:03pm - money - by an idiot (man) - Australia

Today, I unknowingly bought a house next to a former toxic waste dump. I found out by reading an article in the paper where residents are claiming that they are experiencing cancer and birth defects. FML

#20503049
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29287) - you deserved it (6594)

On 02/11/2013 at 11:18pm - health - by toxic waste - United States (New York)

Today, I attended my first surgery as part of my program at med school. I found out that when I see someone's intestines, I vomit. Even if I'm still wearing a surgical mask. There goes the thousands of dollars I spent on college. FML

#20495058
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28969) - you deserved it (6102)

On 02/05/2013 at 10:08pm - health - by A troubled ex med school student - United States (Ohio)

Today, while on the bus, the guy sitting beside me let out the vilest and most nauseating fart I've ever encountered, the kind that could retroactively sterilize five generations of one's ancestors with the smell alone. As I gagged, he smirked and said, "That's Taco Bell for ya." FML

#20466884
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35659) - you deserved it (3475)

On 01/18/2013 at 8:32pm - misc - by methane overload (man) - United States

Today, my husband and I found the perfect house, in our price range and everything we wanted in a house. However, the street it's on is called "Arbour Butte Road". My husband refuses to buy it because he doesn't want it to sound like he lives "in a tree's ass." I'm married to an idiot. FML

#20451265
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29418) - you deserved it (5715)

On 01/10/2013 at 12:53am - misc - by it's just a name (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I found out I'm pregnant. My husband reacted by going out and smoking weed, then getting completely shitfaced, and having his buddies drag his nearly-comatose carcass back home from a strip club. FML

#20442898
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24622) - you deserved it (4509)

On 01/04/2013 at 7:56pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Netherlands (Groningen)

Today, I gave my girlfriend an orgasm. It was great until mid-gasm when she swung her arm out and knocked me out. She still can't stop laughing. FML

#20418972
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39899) - you deserved it (5770)

On 12/24/2012 at 2:44pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, I gave my girlfriend an orgasm. It was great until mid-gasm when she swung her arm out and knocked me out. She still can't stop laughing. FML

#20418972
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39899) - you deserved it (5770)

On 12/24/2012 at 2:44pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, I gave my girlfriend an orgasm. It was great until mid-gasm when she swung her arm out and knocked me out. She still can't stop laughing. FML

#20418972
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39899) - you deserved it (5770)

On 12/24/2012 at 2:44pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, I went on a cruise. I gave my bags to a porter, and tipped him $5. Later that night, my bags still hadn't arrived at my room, and that's when I realized that I'd paid a fake porter to steal my bags. FML

#20397361
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22591) - you deserved it (4678)

On 12/12/2012 at 10:43pm - misc - by McFizzy321 - United States (Florida)

Today, my drunk girlfriend maxed out my credit card, on an "authentic" Jesus Christ autograph on eBay. FML

#20397287
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27831) - you deserved it (4714)

On 12/12/2012 at 9:14pm - misc - by maxedoutidiot - United States

Today, my mom hung her new "Christmas Clock" on the wall. It plays a different Christmas carol every hour, on the hour. It's only December 2nd and I'm already starting to understand why suicide rates sky rocket this time of year. FML

#20188746
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23175) - you deserved it (2351)

On 12/02/2012 at 11:06pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I've been on duty at the hospital for just three hours so far, and I've already pulled five carving forks out of four different people. Good job, everybody. FML

#20174027
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22404) - you deserved it (1523)

On 11/22/2012 at 4:03pm - work - by DocFUCKINGHATESSTUPIDPEOPLE (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I found my childhood diary stashed in a box in the attic. I flipped to the last page and noticed a little note written by my now deceased father. It read, "Well son, this diary proves that you're a whiny asshole - Dad." Thanks Dad, from beyond the grave. FML

#20161095
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23639) - you deserved it (3973)

On 11/12/2012 at 9:47pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Vermont)

Today, I delivered a pizza to a guy so high out of his mind that I had to let myself in and set it down on a table, because he'd forgotten how to walk, and was on the ground sobbing. FML

#20157750
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25719) - you deserved it (1863)

On 11/10/2012 at 4:14pm - misc - by anon - United States (Washington)



FML's blog

  • Malec's illustrated FML
  • Life is like a box of chocolate full of piece of rabbit droppings sometimes, isn't it? OK, I'll admit that's a weird way to start an article a few days before Christmas. Let me explain: you try and get…

Friday 12 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: