Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

sacrosanct2

Online | Search for a member

sacrosanct2

6Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2713
  • Number of comments : 33
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About sacrosanct2 : Nothing is sacred

sacrosanct2's page activity

Visits<b>avadakedabra</b> - yesterday at 10:52am<b>weveallbeenthere</b> - yesterday at 8:11am<b>morondon000</b> - yesterday at 2:19am<b>ktm71125</b> - yesterday at 10:42pm<b>ChristianH39</b> - the 10/22/2014 at 10:18am<b>Holmes27</b> - the 10/21/2014 at 10:50pm<b>shay_serendipity</b> - the 10/21/2014 at 10:32pm<b>spockadelic</b> - the 10/21/2014 at 8:02pm<b>adamxxx2567</b> - the 10/21/2014 at 1:09am<b>lkfldal</b> - the 10/20/2014 at 9:56pm<b>wisesombrero</b> - the 10/20/2014 at 1:02pm<b>mattc99</b> - the 10/20/2014 at 7:51am<b>iJamal</b> - the 10/20/2014 at 12:50am<b>Journiexo</b> - the 10/19/2014 at 3:58pm<b>akforthree</b> - the 10/19/2014 at 1:42pm<b>vegasked</b> - the 10/19/2014 at 8:17am<b>TheMistarrT</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 2:36pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 12:29pm

Liked!<b>morondon000</b> - yesterday at 8:19am<b>spockadelic</b> - the 10/22/2014 at 2:03am<b>wisesombrero</b> - the 10/20/2014 at 7:02pm<b>lkfldal</b> - the 10/20/2014 at 5:43am<b>RocketmanWelbz</b> - the 10/17/2014 at 9:35pm<b>Alicestraza</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 11:18am

sacrosanct2's FML badges

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of sacrosanct2's badges

sacrosanct2's favorite FMLs

Today, I started my shift as a cop, patrolling the streets on a bicycle. Everywhere I went, gangs of youths yelled stuff out at me, like "Bike twat", "Pig on wheels", "That's a girl's bike you muppet" and "Go on wanker, do a wheelie." FML

#17607153
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28259) - you deserved it (7887)

On 08/28/2011 at 6:37pm - work - by Andrew - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I'm sitting in a public toilet when a guy kicks the door in and shoves a police badge in my face, screaming for me to tell him "the path of Lemmiwinks". After a whole minute of me shitting my balls off, he bursts into laughter and tells me I've been pranked. I was too embarrassed to report him. FML

#17522944
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27152) - you deserved it (3671)

On 08/19/2011 at 8:23pm - misc - by shitless88 (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my 3 year old son's tricycle was stolen. I looked up the street and saw a neighbour's kid riding it. I marched up, gently lifted him off it, gave him a stern lecture about stealing and brought the tricycle back home. The cops then showed up. Apparently, the kid has an identical tricycle. FML

#17481344
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12880) - you deserved it (34242)

On 08/15/2011 at 3:14pm - kids - by ollie179 - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)

Today, after pulling an all-nighter, I fell asleep at the beach. My friends took the opportunity to bury me in the sand, place food all around me, and wait for a flock of hungry seagulls to attack me. To top it off, they taped it all. FML

#17460856
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28422) - you deserved it (5711)

On 08/13/2011 at 3:12pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, while stuck in traffic on the highway, my 5 year old in the back seat asked me why the man in the car next to us was pulling on the other man's "peepee". FML

#17361677
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43586) - you deserved it (2767)

On 08/04/2011 at 12:04am - intimacy - by whatnot - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my little brother came into my room and hit me over the head with his baseball bat. He then dropped the bat onto my floor and ran crying into my mother's room proclaiming I stole his bat and beat him with it for fun. FML

#17304859
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34713) - you deserved it (2716)

On 07/30/2011 at 1:15am - kids - by NaomiMadison - United States

Today, someone had the unique opportunity to be able to say to me, "Excuse me, your pants are on fire." FML

#17270186
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27058) - you deserved it (4916)

On 07/26/2011 at 5:22pm - health - by smokin (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, the only thing that managed to get me out of bed was scrambling to watch my neighbours have a screaming match in the middle of our street about which one of their brain-dead kids spray-painted "CUNT FLAPS" and a rudimentary knob on the communal garage door. FML

#17266152
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19793) - you deserved it (2547)

On 07/26/2011 at 10:05am - health - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, in front of family and friends, as I got down on one knee, my girlfriend fainted. Her father, a lawyer, rushed over and said, "Anything she says for the next 72 hours is not legally binding" and whisked her away. FML

#17147393
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38462) - you deserved it (2722)

On 07/17/2011 at 8:34am - love - by bigjohn106 - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was so hungover, I started yelling at inanimate objects. My mom walked in on me calling my cereal a "worthless piece of shit sent from the bowels of Hell." FML

#16950938
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10232) - you deserved it (43114)

On 07/02/2011 at 4:54pm - misc - by Cowgirl_Up37 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to my high school reunion. I was super excited to see what everyone had done in their lives. The nerdy guy I bullied is now a U.S. Marine and already has two deployments in Afghanistan under his belt. He looked at me in his dress blues and said, "I remember you." FML

#16519347
463 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10529) - you deserved it (117036)

On 06/05/2011 at 8:52pm - misc - by kringr (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my mom looked through my browser history and saw Chatroulette. She thought I'd gotten into online gambling, and wouldn't believe me when I explained what it really was. After I insisted on showing her, the first chat window to open contained cocks as far as the eye could see. FML

#16488839
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21579) - you deserved it (37984)

On 06/03/2011 at 8:41pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was slammed onto my car, thrown on the ground, and arrested for outstanding warrants from 1979. I was born in 1992. FML

#16449288
277 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65317) - you deserved it (3608)

On 06/01/2011 at 9:30am - misc - by aarone23 - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, my girlfriend and I were driving to a costume party. On the way, we got into an argument and she kicked me out of her car. I had to walk around the city center in an Iron Man outfit trying to find the party venue. FML

#16446584
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27029) - you deserved it (8640)

On 06/01/2011 at 1:43am - misc - by 2ndplacechamp - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was playing at a bingo hall, when I got a bingo for $50. I got so excited that I accidentally yelled, "Holy fuck!" They kicked me out. I didn't get the money. FML

#16381910
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17161) - you deserved it (41623)

On 05/28/2011 at 1:27am - money - by greenhide8 - United States (North Dakota)



FML's blog

  • Krumla's Illustrated FML
  • It's Friday, so a bold font is required. I was sitting in my caravan by the side of busy road cooking cocktail sausages over a gas stove when I realised it was time to start writing something about this…

Friday 24 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: