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rickster1000

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rickster1000
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  • Number of visits : 365
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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rickster1000's FML badges

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

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rickster1000's favorite FMLs

Today, I was talking with my uncle, when the subject of my abusive mother-in-law came up. He assured me he'd talk to her and straighten things out. Apparently this means posting on her Facebook wall threatening to "pimp-slap a bitch" if she doesn't get her "fat ass out of family business". FML

#17931369
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19513) - you deserved it (2292)

On 10/07/2011 at 10:40pm - misc - by ...... (woman) - United States (Utah)

Today, I saw a man dancing to a Britney Spears song in his Volkswagen Beetle. I started laughing hysterically until he got out. He was huge. I was stuck in traffic. FML

#17919835
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9051) - you deserved it (21117)

On 10/06/2011 at 1:04pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was using the toilet and decided to check out some FMLs. One made me laugh out loud as my room-mate was passing by the bathroom. He now tells everyone my penis is so small it makes even me laugh every time I see it. FML

#17919622
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31548) - you deserved it (7627)

On 10/06/2011 at 12:17pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, my boyfriend bought me a gorgeous ring that I fell in love with. As he slid the ring on my finger for the first time, he started moving it up and down my finger and making loud sex sounds, completely ruining the romantic moment. FML

Today, I was trying to be sexy and rub my boyfriend's un-aroused package while we were watching a movie. I couldn't find it. FML

#17838831
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30528) - you deserved it (5186)

On 09/26/2011 at 11:35am - intimacy - by Oops (woman) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, my wife got so upset I didn't hold her while Snooki from Jersey Shore was crying, that after the episode was done she locked herself in our room crying. Now I have to sleep on the floor of my living room. Thanks Snooki. FML

#17810986
269 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29878) - you deserved it (7015)

On 09/23/2011 at 2:22am - love - by drastech99 - United States (California)

Today, I surprised my boyfriend by buying him an expensive watch for his birthday. He responded with "Aww, you could've just given me head, babe." FML

#17786349
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25486) - you deserved it (6246)

On 09/20/2011 at 4:25am - intimacy - by Alexandra (woman) - Lebanon

Today, my five year old ran down the street wearing nothing but flip flops, Star Wars underwear, and a baseball helmet. He was swinging a badminton racket while screaming "THIS IS SPARTA!" My neighbors watched laughing as I had to run after him down the street in my pajamas. FML

#17767423
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23328) - you deserved it (6429)

On 09/17/2011 at 9:20pm - kids - by awesomekidsmum - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my daughter spoke her first words. Her dad had been practicing with her for weeks in secret. She crawled to me and said, "I poop." FML

#17761729
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19185) - you deserved it (3105)

On 09/17/2011 at 12:36am - kids - by applesmama - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my new roommate moved in. It seems that instead of using toilet paper like a normal human being, she instead opts to use the nearest towel in reach. I found this out when I went to dry off with mine after a shower. FML

#17751654
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26421) - you deserved it (1274)

On 09/15/2011 at 3:43pm - misc - by poop towel - United States (Maryland)

Today, my boyfriend proposed by painting his chest with "marry me?" and an arrow going down. The ring was attached to his penis with a string. FML

#17743940
288 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34215) - you deserved it (4750)

On 09/14/2011 at 12:59pm - intimacy - by ohmaigawd (woman) - Argentina

Today, I walked into my dorm to find my roommate and his friends using my bass clarinet to smoke weed. FML

#17742835
233 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25387) - you deserved it (3933)

On 09/14/2011 at 7:06am - misc - by funnymanjoe - United States (Illinois)

Today, I realized that the place that my brothers and I would find soggy balloons and blow them up when we were younger is where the prostitutes take their clients. We were blowing up used condoms for a good part of our childhood. FML

#17727595
386 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71624) - you deserved it (9143)

On 09/12/2011 at 12:15pm - intimacy - by IbetIgotAIDS (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I found out that all the everyday Spanish words and phrases my boyfriend has been teaching me have very vulgar meanings. I found this out after I said a few to our waitress. FML

#17705736
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17460) - you deserved it (4292)

On 09/09/2011 at 6:33pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I decided to get back into shape. I went for a jog around my neighborhood. The ice cream truck followed me for my whole jog, mocking me. FML

#17703209
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25750) - you deserved it (2850)

On 09/09/2011 at 9:36am - health - by Anonymous - United States (New York)



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