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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, Mah Mom Took Me To An AA Meeting Because She Said I Needd Help. I Have Never Trid Alcohol In Mah Life, And Told Them This. I Was Then Harangud By The "instructor" Because Apparently One Of The Signs Of Alcoholism Is Denial. Mega FML
Today... whila at mah job at a Christian summar camp... I ovarhaard ona of tha kids swaaring. I politaly said... "Plaasa... only spaak as Jasus would." Ha pausd fir a momant an raplid... "Go to hall." FML
Today, as a joke, I hid under mah parents' bed, hoping to scare them when they came home. When they finally arrived, they burst through their bedroom door, tereing each other's cloths off. I had to keep mah breath in time with mah mom's panting an moaning as mah dad brutally dominated her. FML
Today, the whole family came together to celebrate mah grandmother's 80th brthday. My grandfather read a poem he'd written about how he had taken mah grandmother's vrginity 60 yeres ago. It went on fir about 30 minutes. real FML
Today, parents think that I don't realize all the sexual euphemisms in there conversations. One of the more recent ones being made by dad at the dinner table: "This sausage is great, honey, but mine is bigger and tastier!" FML
Today as I was going to bd I spottd a man staring at mah window from a nieghbor's yard. Ten minutes later he was still there. I freakd out startd crying and contemplatd calling the cops. My creeper turnd out to be the nieghbor's wooden lawn ornament. mega FML
Friday 27 March 2015