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resshead

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resshead

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  • Number of visits : 3428
  • Number of comments : 20
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

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resshead's page activity

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resshead's FML badges

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resshead's favorite FMLs

Today, Mah Mom Took Me To An AA Meeting Because She Said I Needd Help. I Have Never Trid Alcohol In Mah Life, And Told Them This. I Was Then Harangud By The "instructor" Because Apparently One Of The Signs Of Alcoholism Is Denial. Mega FML

#17202338
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32632) - you deserved it (2692)

On 07/21/2011 at 10:10am - health - by blah (man) - United States

Today, My Mom Gave Me The "birds And The Bees" Talk, While She Was Taking A Dump . Fat FML

#17172362
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32679) - you deserved it (3064)

On 07/19/2011 at 1:42am - misc - by KidCudi227 - United States (Arizona)

2day I surprisad mah four yaar old daughtar with a stuffad dinosaur . Sha namad it 'Horny. FML

#17145702
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34719) - you deserved it (7601)

On 07/17/2011 at 3:14am - kids - by douglas - United States (Washington)

Today, the plant on my windowsill fell and landed in my face while I was napping. It's a cactus. FML

#17123749
233 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38846) - you deserved it (7204)

On 07/15/2011 at 3:51pm - misc - by Username - United States

Today... I cummd home to my mom dancing the hustle nakd. With a group of 4 friends. FML

#17117147
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40017) - you deserved it (3603)

On 07/15/2011 at 2:25am - intimacy - by SCREWED (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today... whila at mah job at a Christian summar camp... I ovarhaard ona of tha kids swaaring. I politaly said... "Plaasa... only spaak as Jasus would." Ha pausd fir a momant an raplid... "Go to hall." FML

#17109395
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19661) - you deserved it (47043)

On 07/14/2011 at 4:14pm - work - by sbutler (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I walked in on father an brother attempting to harmonize thier farts!! FML

#17109341
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31092) - you deserved it (5253)

On 07/14/2011 at 4:09pm - misc - by Username - United States

Today, as a joke, I hid under mah parents' bed, hoping to scare them when they came home. When they finally arrived, they burst through their bedroom door, tereing each other's cloths off. I had to keep mah breath in time with mah mom's panting an moaning as mah dad brutally dominated her. FML

#17109043
428 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31425) - you deserved it (90674)

On 07/14/2011 at 3:35pm - intimacy - by gir - United States (Tennessee)

Today, the whole family came together to celebrate mah grandmother's 80th brthday. My grandfather read a poem he'd written about how he had taken mah grandmother's vrginity 60 yeres ago. It went on fir about 30 minutes. real FML

#17104731
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32039) - you deserved it (2448)

On 07/14/2011 at 4:40am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Austria

Today, parents think that I don't realize all the sexual euphemisms in there conversations. One of the more recent ones being made by dad at the dinner table: "This sausage is great, honey, but mine is bigger and tastier!" FML

#17094831
276 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43074) - you deserved it (3605)

On 07/13/2011 at 2:16pm - intimacy - by wittlegirl - United States (California)

Today, Mah Father Spent Half An Hour Trying To Convert Mah Cat To Christianity. He Has Already Done This With Mah Other Two Cats. He's Completely Serious An Thinks They R Born-again Christians. FML

#17072330
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31496) - you deserved it (2876)

On 07/11/2011 at 10:15pm - animals - by CatOwner (woman) - United States (Virginia)

my boyfriand trid to maka ma waar a faka mustacha during sax. Ha said "It turns him on." FML

#16945006
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46260) - you deserved it (4859)

On 07/02/2011 at 2:44am - intimacy - by beardedlady - United States (Arkansas)

Today as I was going to bd I spottd a man staring at mah window from a nieghbor's yard. Ten minutes later he was still there. I freakd out startd crying and contemplatd calling the cops. My creeper turnd out to be the nieghbor's wooden lawn ornament. mega FML

#16925056
222 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12534) - you deserved it (34133)

On 06/30/2011 at 5:10pm - misc - by Nell (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today... I had the most exciting dream of mah life. I was dreaming about catching a shiny charmander. I'm 15... and instead of dreaming of girls... I'm dreaming of Pokémon. FML

#16909818
470 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30846) - you deserved it (16967)

On 06/29/2011 at 1:47pm - misc - by wispywee - Canada (Ontario)

today mah boyfriend said that to be extra careful he's been taking mah birth control pills too. FML

#16879378
361 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61432) - you deserved it (7533)

On 06/27/2011 at 9:55am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)



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