resshead

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resshead

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 5410
  • Number of comments : 20
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

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resshead's page activity

Visits<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 08/03/2016 at 5:08pm<b>Dalboz</b> - the 05/20/2016 at 12:46pm<b>obewonstrangeone</b> - the 03/18/2016 at 2:05am<b>epicgamer</b> - the 03/10/2016 at 8:00pm<b>junjunbun</b> - the 01/25/2016 at 5:07pm<b>AnxietyQueen</b> - the 10/25/2015 at 12:55pm<b>yorkie_16</b> - the 09/10/2015 at 6:42pm<b>Pikathedoge</b> - the 08/22/2015 at 3:45pm<b>slushey</b> - the 03/20/2015 at 4:48pm<b>mrseppski18</b> - the 08/01/2014 at 1:24am<b>tynudy123</b> - the 07/02/2014 at 12:56am<b>Damafia</b> - the 07/01/2014 at 9:17am<b>Drag0nb0rn</b> - the 06/10/2014 at 10:07pm<b>oops6663</b> - the 04/24/2014 at 4:38pm<b>kino22x</b> - the 04/20/2014 at 4:24pm<b>nerdtron430</b> - the 03/07/2014 at 7:52pm<b>zimmerman8297</b> - the 12/15/2013 at 9:02pm<b>grogers311</b> - the 11/29/2013 at 2:32pm

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 08/03/2016 at 11:08pm

resshead's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

resshead's favorite FMLs

Today, I'm cheering myself up about being newly single by having a sleepover with my best friends. Their boyfriends have all decided to sleep over as well though, so I'm currently alone in a corridor with nothing but the sound of all my friends having loud sex to keep me company. FML

by coffeeshopgirl / 05/07/2012 at 8:25pm / United Kingdom / Intimacy

Today, I got an inconvenient erection while at my girlfriends house, so I tried to think of something stupid to get rid of it. I tried thinking of Pokémon, which actually made me harder. FML

by me / 05/07/2012 at 4:38pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, while showering with my boyfriend, he asked if something was weird about his penis. Naturally, I looked closer. As soon as I did, he sprayed my face with urine. This is only the beginning; we just moved in. FML

by quirrus / 05/07/2012 at 5:42am / United States / Intimacy

Today, my dad found a couple of coins on the floor next to my desk, and gave me a lecture about how money doesn't grow on trees and how irresponsible I am when it comes to money. They were Chuck E. Cheese tokens. FML

by rofindie / 05/07/2012 at 12:12am / United States (New York) / Money

Today, my girlfriend gave birth to our first child. Our nurse was the lady I had a one night stand with 3 nights ago, and yes she remembered me. FML

by T3STI / 05/06/2012 at 9:44pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, while at the store, I realized how socially inept I am when I said "excuse me" to a shopping cart because it was in my way. FML

Today, I got tasered by a cop. It was his second day on the job. My crime? Sneezing during a sobriety test. FML

by Anonymous / 05/05/2012 at 7:44am / United States / Health

Today, I was at the gym trying to impress a hot girl, so I put an extra 30 pounds on the bar, I lowered, pushed... and pooped. FML

by authorsubmit / 05/04/2012 at 8:49am / United States / Health

Today, while I was sneaking a boy out of my room at 2am, I ran into my mom sneaking a man into her room. FML

by dentistrygirl / 05/03/2012 at 3:41pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I sarcastically pointed out a book to my mom, titled "Living Successfully With Screwed Up People." She already has it. FML

by screwedupkid / 05/03/2012 at 1:45pm / Miscellaneous

Today, I went on a picnic with my boyfriend's family. I thought it would be nice to wear my sundress and cowgirl boots. The wind repeatedly picked up my dress in front of everyone, including my boyfriend's seedy grandpa, who I have to admit can do a pretty good wolf-whistle. FML

by EyeSeeYou / 05/02/2012 at 2:34pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out the guy I've been crushing on for many years thinks he's a werewolf. FML

by Anonymous / 04/27/2012 at 11:24am / United States / Love

Today, my boss overheard me singing, "I need a shit, I need a shit" on my way to the bathroom. FML

by NoPrivacy / 04/26/2012 at 6:44am / United States / Work

Today, I was trolling in a chat room when someone said, quote: "He's just a no-life, unemployed loser still living in his mom's basement. Probably spends all day stroking his tiny dong and fantasizing about having a real girlfriend." I actually started crying because it was so accurate. FML

by pathetic / 04/23/2012 at 6:06pm / Poland (Mazowieckie) / Geek

Today, I woke up to a really cold feeling down below. I opened my eyes and saw my girlfriend grinning like a maniac and holding my crotch-sausage between two scissor blades. I screamed in terror like a little bitch, and she says I'm never gonna live this down. FML

by Hakimstah / 04/21/2012 at 1:38pm / Lebanon / Intimacy