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reapfml

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 12177
  • Number of comments : 88
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 17 posted

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reapfml's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at the mall shoplifting when a girl who looked my age pointed to a shirt I had in my bag. "Stole that, huh?" she asked smiling. She looked pretty cool, so I nodded and asked if she stole the jeans she was wearing, which were from the store. Turns out she didn't, she's the manager. FML

#843065
682 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33383) - you deserved it (484424)

On 04/06/2009 at 8:41pm - misc - by blovesg (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I went to buy beer underage for a party to impress a girl. I picked up the case of beer and went to the cashier, he ran it through without asking for ID. I left the store with a smirk on my face, I arrived at the party and showed the case to the girl. It was non-alcoholic. FML

#825703
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9567) - you deserved it (90165)

On 04/05/2009 at 10:22pm - love - by Triedtobecool (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I found out that I'm failing this semester because I've missed too many classes. I've missed the classes because I've been having panic attacks, a symptom of my anxiety disorder. I got the anxiety disorder because I was so afraid of failing school. FML

#592595
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (99036) - you deserved it (26032)

On 03/25/2009 at 12:12am - work - by disfordiploma (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, it's my 18th birthday. My parents got me a $5 gift certificate to iTunes. It came for free with the iPhone they just bought my sister for her middle school graduation. FML

#580113
484 comments

I agree, your life sucks (602655) - you deserved it (38017)

On 03/24/2009 at 5:15pm - misc - by happybirthday (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I had an elaborate plan to ask this girl to Prom, and it was going to take a few minutes to set up. I asked my friend to distract her. He decided to distract her by asking her to Prom. She said "Yes". FML

#574471
264 comments

I agree, your life sucks (253204) - you deserved it (42910)

On 03/24/2009 at 11:41am - love - by Kaeyne (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was with my girlfriend and she was making me listen to one of her recordings for chorus. As I was listening to it a solo came on, and i turned to her and said "This is the worst F*ing solo I've ever heard in my life." Little did I know, it was her solo. FML

#539195
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13631) - you deserved it (79914)

On 03/22/2009 at 8:38pm - misc - by anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my parents were out so I invited my girlfriend over. It was the afternoon, and things started to heat up. We were having sex, and I was about to finish. Then I looked through the window, to see a construction worker (who was fixing the house next to mine) giving me a thumbs up. He's her dad. FML

#527563
373 comments

I agree, your life sucks (174255) - you deserved it (30377)

On 03/22/2009 at 9:04am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Malta

Today, my boyfriend was really stressed about a guy he works with being a jerk. I told him "if you ignore something long enough, it won't bother you anymore." His response was "I've ignored my herpes for a long time but it still bothers me." We've been having sex for 3 months now. FML

#511174
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (126516) - you deserved it (20376)

On 03/21/2009 at 3:03pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I had to sleep in the same room as my grandparents. They checked to see if I was asleep, so I pretended to be to avoid getting scolded for staying up. Turns out they were checking so that they could make love. I witnessed two 70-year-olds have sex in the bed next to me for 20 minutes. FML

#507959
296 comments

I agree, your life sucks (216135) - you deserved it (27980)

On 03/21/2009 at 11:38am - intimacy - by Mike (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I went over to surprise my girlfriend of two years with flowers and dinner at her apartment. After I knocked, a handsome young man answered the door. Thinking I had the wrong apartment, I apologized, only to hear my girlfriend's voice call from the background, "Baby, who's there?" FML

#504108
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (147337) - you deserved it (7120)

On 03/21/2009 at 1:33am - intimacy - by willywonks (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I decided to surprise my boyfriend at his college and when I walked into the dorm he was lying in his bed with another girl. When he saw me he simply said, "April Fool's!" It's March 19th. FML

#461201
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (138983) - you deserved it (8576)

On 03/19/2009 at 3:40am - intimacy - by cmerr (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I texted my boyfriend of 6 months saying that I was in the mood, and that I was in bed, and naked. He texted back saying "U got fingers, use them, im going to bed xoxo". FML

#405303
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (136925) - you deserved it (36912)

On 03/17/2009 at 1:06am - intimacy - by princess (woman) - Canada (Quebec)



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