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reapfml
  • Town/Country : San Diego, USA
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 11315
  • Number of comments : 88
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 17 posted

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reapfml's favorite FMLs

Today, I was texting the girl I am in love with. I was dropping hints about liking someone who I didn't know if they liked me back. Flirting a little. And just when I thought she'd say she liked me too, she said "Don't worry, if you were straight, I would definitely date you!". FML

#3186990
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41931) - you deserved it (4536)

On 06/24/2009 at 9:15pm - love - by fml7458364838 (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to write "Happy Bday, I Love You" on my girlfriend's car windows to surprise her when she woke up. I was the one who got the surprise when I saw her, in her backseat, having sex. FML

#3165290
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70155) - you deserved it (2967)

On 06/24/2009 at 2:13am - intimacy - by anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was shopping for my little sister's birthday. She loves manga. I've never read manga, so I bought a couple of novels from the "popular" shelf. Turns out if they have white covers it means they are "adult" books. I bought my sister a "lolicon" manga - filled with prebuscent naked girls. FML

#3097066
252 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30890) - you deserved it (18358)

On 06/21/2009 at 6:10pm - kids - by loli-conned (man) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, I thought I saw a woodchuck far out in my yard. I wanted to take a cool picture of it so I slowly crept closer and closer to it. I spent half an hour sneaking up on a log. FML

#2900113
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14941) - you deserved it (46158)

On 06/14/2009 at 11:37pm - misc - by thelarkscaw (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I found out that my 'girlfriend', who I've been emailing with, was really my friend playing a prank on me. He asked me for naked pictures of myself and I sent them to him. FML

#2842632
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18779) - you deserved it (66288)

On 06/12/2009 at 9:47pm - love - by Paco4242 (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I signed up for an online dating service, a couple of days after my divorce. I got my first batch of matches, and number one was a smiling picture of the woman who had just divorced my ass after 20+ years together. Her profile shows she has to have been active there for months. FML

#2827492
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64240) - you deserved it (3577)

On 06/12/2009 at 11:05am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was babysitting my 5 month old nephew who hasn't pooped in 2 days according to his mom. Well, he pooped. I accidentally stuck my finger in it. While I was wiping my finger off, he rolls over and pees on my new carpet. I roll him over to clean the pee and he opened fire and pooped again. FML

#2816506
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44390) - you deserved it (4502)

On 06/11/2009 at 10:39pm - kids - by chuchie (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my mom's will was read to the rest of the family. I helped my mom write it a couple years ago, and I was to get funds to pay off school loans. She revised it and put in a note saying I was to get nothing because I was "lazy." The executor read it out loud. FML

#2796619
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (90713) - you deserved it (7759)

On 06/11/2009 at 7:51am - money - by TSampson (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I heard my daughter scream at my son through the bathroom door, "Are you jacking off in there or something?" and him scream back at her "Shut up you fucking cunt!" My daughter is 7 and my son is 8. FML

#2772494
813 comments

I agree, your life sucks (113719) - you deserved it (71758)

On 06/10/2009 at 2:09pm - intimacy - by badmom (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my boyfriend of 4 years proposed to me. I wasn't expecting anything too romantic, but I would have liked something more than an email from Facebook, requesting my confirmation that we were engaged. FML

#2713255
307 comments

I agree, your life sucks (84430) - you deserved it (5027)

On 06/08/2009 at 6:41am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Singapore

Today, I checked my bank account that i've been saving money in since I was a kid for college. I have $100 left out of the $10,000 I had last month. Apparently my parents thought buying a pool and an HDTV for themselves was more important than my college education. FML

#2645679
411 comments

I agree, your life sucks (109939) - you deserved it (5002)

On 06/05/2009 at 10:24pm - money - by ExtemelyBroke (man) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, at a party, my three friends and I thought it would be fun to urinate in a jug. We dislike the neighbours, so decided to throw the contents of the jug over the fence into their garden. It hit a tree and splashed back. I ended up covered in our piss. FML

#2592984
375 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9343) - you deserved it (158931)

On 06/04/2009 at 6:38am - misc - by Unluggee (woman) - United Kingdom (Liverpool)

Today, I was cleaning my father's study room and wondering why I did not receive my acceptance/rejection letter from a college I really wanted. I found the acceptance letter, on his desk, also approving of a full scholarship. The deadline to confirm was a month ago. FML

#2545642
308 comments

I agree, your life sucks (172563) - you deserved it (8242)

On 06/02/2009 at 8:10pm - misc - by guamfml - Guam

Today, my boyfriend and parents went out to dinner. As we started the meal, my boyfriend proposed and the restaurant burst into applause. My mother said without hesitation and a large scowl, "If you say yes, I'm leaving." FML



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