About rawr_iliketacos : BEAST MODE! :D
My name is Taylor Slaughter, and I'm an xbox addict. Ive been sober for 20 minutes.
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, my cousin came to visit from America. While out shopping, she said loudly that she was having trouble finding clothes to fit around her huge fanny, causing a lot of people to stare in our direction. I had to explain to her that "fanny" in the UK means "vagina." FML
I agree, your life sucks (27635) - you deserved it (2871)
On 09/09/2010 at 10:00am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London)
Today, I got food poisoning and have had the worst diarrhea ever. I laid down in bed, hoping to get some rest when my dad thought it'd be a good idea to sneak into my room and scare the shit out of me. Literally. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25252) - you deserved it (1573)
On 03/08/2010 at 12:34am - misc - by itsEVERYWHERE (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, at lunch, a fly was buzzing around my food. I managed to kill the fly in my napkin in midair. I continued my lunch, pleased with my amazing ninja skills. When I was done with my lunch, I wiped my mouth with the napkin. I can still taste bug guts. Karma. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7550) - you deserved it (22961)
On 10/22/2009 at 12:19am - animals - by munckncruncj15 (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I thought it would be funny to bother my friend Emily. I kept punching her. She asked if I wanted to fight. I agreed because she's a 15 year old skinny girl and I'm 17 year old buff guy. She beat the crap out of me until I cried. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13278) - you deserved it (104270)
On 05/24/2009 at 5:49am - misc - by AyoitsSteveo (man) - United States (California)
Today, a 7 year old girl came up to me and told me to fuck myself. I told her to watch her language or else I'd tell her parents. Her mom happened to be nearby and actually heard this conversation, she came up to me and told me to fuck myself as well. FML
I agree, your life sucks (192793) - you deserved it (18017)
On 03/30/2009 at 1:06am - kids - by Wmsys32pr9 (man) - United States (Washington)
Today, I decided to call my wife while she was having a private lunch with my parents. I began to tell her all the nasty things I was going to do to her in bed. Halfway through my fantasy, she giggled and told me that she was going to take me off speakerphone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26337) - you deserved it (59577)
On 03/11/2009 at 3:49pm - intimacy - by SoggyPancakes (man) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I drove to Bank of America to deposit money. Upon returning to my car I saw some new scratches on the front. I kicked and rubbed it to try and get rid of it. Then I notice someone in the car staring at me in bewilderment. I'd parked 2 spaces away. We have the same car. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10747) - you deserved it (29170)
On 03/06/2009 at 7:09pm - misc - by 1 Giant Cupcake (man) - United States (California)
Today, I came home from work. I crept up to the bedroom to gently wake up my girlfriend. I touch her shoulder and slowly leant in to give her a tender kiss. She suddenly wakes up and grabs me by the throat... I keep forgetting she's in the army. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19485) - you deserved it (5603)
On 01/09/2009 at 10:23pm - love - by Cùchulainn - Sent from mobile version
Today, I played a table tennis final in public. After winning, I went to shake my opponent's hand. He doesn't react or move. It was only the first set. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8668) - you deserved it (6553)
On 12/21/2008 at 2:00am - misc - by Bito - Sent from mobile version
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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