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randombleeps

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 458
  • Number of comments : 10
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About randombleeps : I LOVE MY MUSIC LOUD!!!!!

randombleeps's page activity

Visits<b>Juicenub</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 8:35am<b>wysteria14</b> - the 09/24/2014 at 2:44pm<b>Dchag117</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 12:42pm<b>wolfgold2</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 8:23pm<b>professorstark</b> - the 06/16/2014 at 2:12am<b>billionair11</b> - the 06/07/2014 at 9:51pm<b>Ellie323</b> - the 05/26/2014 at 7:49pm<b>KhazKhazz</b> - the 05/15/2014 at 3:31am<b>Rababco</b> - the 02/13/2014 at 10:03pm<b>Plumshot</b> - the 10/26/2013 at 10:09am<b>Wizardo</b> - the 06/11/2013 at 11:13am<b>PleaseStayChill</b> - the 05/10/2013 at 3:58pm<b>Dennisse_47</b> - the 05/08/2013 at 11:21pm<b>ambitiousnygrl</b> - the 05/03/2013 at 7:06pm<b>tlodge78</b> - the 05/01/2013 at 1:55pm<b>NotSoHigh</b> - the 05/01/2013 at 3:42am<b>hama806</b> - the 05/01/2013 at 1:26am<b>Bunchofdipsticks</b> - the 04/30/2013 at 9:51pm

randombleeps's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

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randombleeps's favorite FMLs

Today, I was playing World of Warcraft, when all of a sudden, I remembered I was supposed to be at a wedding. I was 25 minutes late to my own wedding. FML

#20880446
282 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22192) - you deserved it (89209)

On 09/14/2013 at 1:23am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, a week after my dad discovered Family Guy and started mindlessly repeating catchphrases from it 24/7, I finally lost my temper and told him how incredibly annoying it is. He just paused, turned to look me in the eyes, and said, "Shut up, Meg." FML

#20870528
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51565) - you deserved it (18775)

On 09/06/2013 at 6:56pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I'm trapped in my apartment. My new cat won't let me leave. Every time I try, he blocks the door, hisses and tries to savage me. I'm my own cat's bitch. FML

#20864719
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45200) - you deserved it (19230)

On 09/02/2013 at 3:22pm - animals - by aherdofpigs - United States

Today, I was visiting my cousin's farm. Going out for a morning stroll, I took an apple with me to munch along the way. As I was eating it, I heard a distant thumping sound and was suddenly slammed into the ground. When I looked up, a horse was eating my apple. I got mugged by a horse. FML

#20836718
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54226) - you deserved it (6162)

On 08/14/2013 at 5:11am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was at a job interview for a position I really needed. Somehow, the interviewer and I started talking about fishing. I joked, "I'm a master baiter." Needless to say, I didn't get the job. FML

#20833743
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28302) - you deserved it (39547)

On 08/12/2013 at 1:11pm - work - by master baiter - United States (New York)

Today, my 14-year-old daughter convinced my son that when he was born, he was actually born as a girl, but we wanted a boy so bad we had his gender changed. Now he wants to change back to a girl because now he doesn't feel right as a boy. Last year, she got her other brother to cross dress. FML

#20832766
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49244) - you deserved it (5203)

On 08/11/2013 at 8:58pm - kids - by mydaughterisdisturbed - United States (Indiana)

Today, I walked in on my husband putting my anti-wrinkle cream on his balls. He said, "I thought it'd help." FML

#20822001
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48553) - you deserved it (4905)

On 08/05/2013 at 12:41pm - intimacy - by Serum - United States (Kansas)

Today, I was washing up in a public bathroom, when I looked up for a second and saw a kid in the mirror staring back at me. I gasped, as I thought the place had been empty. He whispered, "It's time to die." I screamed and ran out, only to hear him burst out laughing behind me. FML

#20817313
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49748) - you deserved it (8432)

On 08/02/2013 at 4:57pm - misc - by lights on forever (woman) - Turkey (Istanbul)

Today, after more than six years of working my ass off, I finally summoned the courage to ask my boss for a raise. She just chuckled, "I'm gonna need you to eat a dick, John." and stared at me unblinking until I awkwardly left. FML

#20790691
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46561) - you deserved it (3798)

On 07/18/2013 at 3:53pm - work - by no new apartment for me (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my girlfriend guilted me into roleplaying as Justin Bieber before and during sex. I now feel physically ill. FML

#20788707
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62293) - you deserved it (22187)

On 07/17/2013 at 4:27pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I took my boyfriend to meet my family. Over the next hour, a huge religious debate erupted, and my grandfather drunkenly told us all how he almost killed himself once while experimenting with auto-erotic asphyxiation. My boyfriend called us all crazy and seems to have dumped me. FML

#20788678
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45412) - you deserved it (4946)

On 07/17/2013 at 4:13pm - love - by fuck family (woman) - Poland (Dolnoslaskie)

Today, trying to be funny in front of some friends, I held my cat above my head Lion King style. The height must have made him nervous, because he shat on my head. FML

#20788265
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27934) - you deserved it (49825)

On 07/17/2013 at 12:02pm - animals - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had to pull one of those toy stretchy hands out of my dog's butthole. It slapped me in the face when I finally got it out. FML

#20787584
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56399) - you deserved it (6676)

On 07/17/2013 at 12:48am - animals - by anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my grandmother, who has Alzheimer's, cornered me in the kitchen and called the cops. My crime? Robbery, of my own house. FML

#20786208
64 comments

Today, I knocked over a display case at a mall, shattering hundreds of dollars in goods. Embarrassed, I tried to scurry out of the nearest door without being seen. I scuttled right into the janitor's closet, the door automatically locking behind me. I waited for an hour to be let out. FML

#20784911
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22228) - you deserved it (43517)

On 07/15/2013 at 7:36pm - money - by Jer (man) - United States (Kentucky)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

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FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

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