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Today, I asked my 2 year old son to clean up his toys. When I bent down to give him a good job kiss afterwards, he punched me in the nose. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24727) - you deserved it (8348)
On 04/02/2011 at 3:35am - kids - by Viciousvixen_21 (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I found out that my dog is so lazy, she doesn't even get out of my bed in the morning to poop. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11843) - you deserved it (2178)
On 04/01/2011 at 5:12pm - animals - by poopybed - United States (Illinois)
Today, I was dumped by my boyfriend. We're currently sharing a room on a cruise ship. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31535) - you deserved it (4056)
On 04/01/2011 at 1:35pm - love - by gRRRrr (woman) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, I caught my boyfriend secretly using my hair straightener while I was in the other room. Too embarrassed to talk to him about it, I left and came back later, only to discover him slipping on a pair of my panties. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38370) - you deserved it (5679)
On 04/01/2011 at 11:55am - misc - by WTF? - United Kingdom (London)
Today, just a few minutes after I got to work, my usually laconic boss came into my office and said, "Pack your stuff and get the f*ck out." Apparently, half my department was being downsized. Thinking it was an April Fool's, I burst out laughing and told him how funny the prank was. He wasn't kidding. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24809) - you deserved it (3041)
On 04/01/2011 at 10:19am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, my dad came home drunk and called me hot. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41369) - you deserved it (4054)
On 03/31/2011 at 11:18pm - misc - by paige - United States (Ohio)
Today, I was trying to replace the lightbulb in my bedroom. Since I couldn't reach it by myself, I grabbed and stood on a chair. After I got two broken bones, and had stitches in my forehead, I figured that using a chair with wheels probably wasn't the best idea after all. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7222) - you deserved it (50472)
On 03/31/2011 at 10:23pm - misc - by owies :( - United States (Florida)
Today, my girlfriend tearfully complained that I was smothering her to death with my clinginess, and that I should learn to respect her boundaries. This is after she complained I wasn't giving her enough attention. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26517) - you deserved it (3591)
On 03/31/2011 at 5:53pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Arkansas)
Today, I managed to stab myself with a knife while trying to open something without a can opener. After getting stitches and returning back home, I went to make a cup of coffee. I found the can opener in the cutlery drawer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12441) - you deserved it (16280)
On 03/31/2011 at 3:18pm - misc - by nicky (woman) - United Kingdom (Surrey)
Today, a guy who I have known for a long time confessed his love to me. It would have been sweet except that he will become my stepbrother in 3 days. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26470) - you deserved it (1994)
On 02/26/2011 at 9:03am - love - by welcometothefamily - United States (Georgia)
Today, I painted an area I had carefully sanded, cleaned, and taped off. I pulled a fan out of the closet to help dry it faster. I turned the fan on, and a million dust particles flew off onto the wet paint. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8443) - you deserved it (18093)
On 02/26/2011 at 8:57am - misc - by Carmen - United States (Ohio)
Today, I cheated on my math exam. I still failed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8156) - you deserved it (48599)
On 02/26/2011 at 1:49am - misc - by hopeless (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I had to present a powerpoint in front of my class. When I was finished, no one clapped. On my way back to my seat, I slipped on a pencil and fell straight on my face. That's when everyone clapped. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27398) - you deserved it (3074)
On 02/26/2011 at 12:34am - misc - by Franigirl - United States (Virginia)
Today, my fiancé and I were cuddling on the couch watching TV when we started kissing. As I crawled onto his lap and started to unzip his pants, he said, "You're blocking the TV." FML
I agree, your life sucks (28402) - you deserved it (4791)
On 02/25/2011 at 1:36pm - intimacy - by unwantedlove (woman) - France
Today, while having sex, I found out that I'm so flexible that when I bend over backwards, the backs of my knees can touch my shoulders. My boyfriend is now extremely jealous and is debating about breaking up with me. Even I don't get it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35730) - you deserved it (3125)
On 02/25/2011 at 11:03am - intimacy - by inder (woman) - United Kingdom (Stoke-on-Trent)
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