- Town/Country : Not specified
- Title : Not specified
- Birth Date : Not specified
- <3 status : Single
- Number of visits : 4019
- Number of comments : 0
- Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted
About rainbowdeathray : ...?
About rainbowdeathray : ...?
This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
Checking you out
You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.
You have shared 20 FMLs on Twitter, your followers love you and we can understand why.
Today, my husband went nuts. He's quit his job and set out building an amateur bomb shelter in our backyard. According to him, there's "substantial evidence" that cannibalism is on the rise across the country, and that "it's gonna be like Resident Evil out there, babe." FML
by why... / 06/05/2012 at 1:21pm / United States (New Jersey) / Love
by Scared / 06/04/2012 at 8:54pm / United States (Virginia) / Animals
by unacceptable / 06/04/2012 at 11:02am / Australia / Miscellaneous
by boohoo / 06/04/2012 at 8:45am / Netherlands (Noord-Holland) / Love
by Former Drummer / 06/03/2012 at 5:23pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Health
Today, I was operating on a young girl, when she began to awaken during the surgery. We quickly put her back under, of course, but now I'm terrified that she'll remember my profuse cursing and get me in the shit with my curmudgeonly killjoy of a boss. FML
by Anonymous / 06/03/2012 at 4:27pm / United States / Work
Today, Child Protective Services came to my house, because my 7-year-old son told people at school that he was uncomfortable sleeping in his uncle's bed. I had to explain to them that the uncle in question died 2 years ago, and that's why it felt weird. FML
by Anonymous / 06/01/2012 at 3:02am / United States / Kids
Today, I found out that my colleagues had replaced my email auto-responder with a message saying, "I'm away for two weeks in Brazil. Due to the surgery, when I return, please address me by my new name: Crystal." FML
by Monsieur-Madame / 05/31/2012 at 4:19pm / France (Champagne-Ardenne) / Love
Today, while sitting in my Forensic Psychology class, my professor listed all of the main traits that indicate someone may very well be a sociopath. Every single trait described my fiancé perfectly. FML
by Getmeout / 05/31/2012 at 2:50am / United States (Virginia) / Love
Today, after a surprise candlelit dinner and a two bottles of wine for my birthday, my boyfriend and I decided to take a sexy shower together. It ended with us both drunk, naked, and crying, wedged into a small tub together, talking about our dead pets. FML
by Anonymous / 05/30/2012 at 1:46am / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, I had a babysitting job. When I got there, the parents were rushing out the door and told me they'd left instructions for the kids on the table. The first bullet point stated that the oldest was convinced she is possessed by the devil, but just to ignore it. Three more hours to go. FML
by Anonymous / 05/29/2012 at 9:55pm / United States (Iowa) / Kids
Today, I had to get the manager of a grocery store to explain to his employee how coupons work. The employee had refused to accept the coupons I was using, for fear that, "they will be deducted from my paycheck." FML
by brunurb / 05/29/2012 at 7:40am / United States (Massachusetts) / Money
by Anonymous / 05/24/2012 at 9:37pm / United States (Kansas) / Kids
by littlebigbrother / 05/23/2012 at 2:13am / Japan / Miscellaneous