About racerapj : Man a bio. I usually have nothing to write here. I'm going to try this...
Hi you found me and I'm not here. Please leave your name and phone number and I'll get back to you later. *beep*
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Today, I witnessed a robbery as a teenager ran out of a Walgreens with stolen goods in his hands. The manager was running after him. Trying to be helpful, I pulled forward to block the thief from getting away. The cops showed up and arrested me for hitting a pedestrian. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18116) - you deserved it (3083)
On 11/19/2012 at 1:18am - misc - by ausmill12 (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, my laptop got hit by a Trojan. Not the malware, but a used condom thrown from a car driving past as I sat on a street bench. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23364) - you deserved it (1466)
On 09/28/2012 at 4:24am - intimacy - by iNearlyHurled - United States
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. It would have been a lot sexier had our chihuahua not decided to rim his ass as he thrust into me, causing him to break out into a case of the giggles. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16933) - you deserved it (4047)
On 09/13/2012 at 1:30am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I found out that my crush didn't remember calling me beautiful, telling me he liked me, or any of the other romantic things he said to me while drunk last night. He did however remember me promising to bake him cookies. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16295) - you deserved it (1792)
On 08/25/2012 at 2:53am - misc - by coolcocoxxx (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was at a barbecue with my extended family. I was chatting to my grandma, when my idiotic brother decided to douse the grill with his cola. The hissing sounded so much like a Minecraft creeper that I instinctively screamed and practically shat my pants. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6750) - you deserved it (17228)
On 07/30/2012 at 6:21pm - misc - by NaKreen (man) - Sweden (Vastra Gotaland)
Today, my girlfriend called and said she had great news. Turns out I've cured her of that illness she gets every month. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22484) - you deserved it (12952)
On 03/14/2012 at 3:51am - misc - by daddy-o - United States (Utah)
I agree, your life sucks (6130) - you deserved it (16619)
On 03/11/2012 at 7:19pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, I met my brother for the first time in 20 years. Everything was going great, until he tried to make out with me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35524) - you deserved it (1974)
On 02/16/2012 at 4:13pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, I found my lost iPhone earbuds. In the cat litter box. I am 100% sure that they passed through my cat to get there. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24556) - you deserved it (3795)
On 07/20/2010 at 12:34pm - animals - by brentkd - United States
Today, while making out with my boyfriend, he started playing with my nipples. Suddenly he stops kissing me, looks at my nipples and says, "Have they always been like this? They look like joysticks!". He then started singing the Super Mario Brother's theme song and playing the game with my nipples. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20714) - you deserved it (3896)
On 03/14/2010 at 10:09pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I came down with sudden diarrhea while at taekwondo practice. I discreetly called my dad for a pickup, but on our way out, he told my instructor that I had to go because I was "shitting my pants with fear". He did this in front of all my classmates. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17423) - you deserved it (1693)
On 03/04/2010 at 1:52pm - health - by GoDiarrhea (woman) - Argentina (Distrito Federal)
Today, I was about to take a crap when the smoke alarm went off. I ran out of the bathroom and tried to run downstairs. I tripped and shit on myself. The alarm had gone off cause my kid put my wallet in the toaster. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28368) - you deserved it (3391)
On 02/09/2010 at 1:20pm - kids - by justme - Sent from mobile version
Today, my boyfriend of six months dumped me for his girlfriend on Grand Theft Auto because he was "tired of having to please two women at once." FML
I agree, your life sucks (23538) - you deserved it (3045)
On 02/08/2010 at 9:17pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, I learned that if you stare at your cat and her eyes suddenly get really big, it means she's going to maul your face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11833) - you deserved it (20748)
On 11/18/2009 at 4:01pm - animals - by nycplywood (man) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, a Milkbone commercial came on TV. At the end of it, they whistle and throw a Milkbone across the screen, prompting my 100lb German Shepherd to leap off the couch and run head on into my new plasma screen TV. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39595) - you deserved it (3777)
On 11/03/2009 at 1:11pm - misc - by doglover (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
