Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

quraishakrueger

Search for a member

quraishakrueger

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 27 October 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4458
  • Number of comments : 62
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

quraishakrueger's page activity

Visits<b>ZombieSazza</b> - the 06/11/2015 at 3:19am<b>mazdatuner09</b> - the 02/13/2015 at 5:33pm<b>Nailpolishaholic</b> - the 02/06/2015 at 6:18am<b>Superdouchebag</b> - the 05/04/2014 at 6:10pm<b>FuckkSam</b> - the 03/06/2014 at 11:47pm<b>ActionFearo</b> - the 02/26/2014 at 11:29pm<b>scrapedforward</b> - the 02/06/2014 at 9:55am<b>lilabbs</b> - the 12/30/2013 at 9:22pm<b>ghiman</b> - the 09/29/2013 at 10:23pm<b>GodOfCybertron</b> - the 04/21/2013 at 1:23pm<b>smr167</b> - the 01/08/2013 at 11:39am<b>khaya</b> - the 01/25/2012 at 12:53am<b>youtubetre</b> - the 11/30/2011 at 12:37pm<b>Riiley</b> - the 11/24/2011 at 1:15pm<b>fthislyfe</b> - the 09/29/2011 at 10:49am<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:28pm<b>jren207</b> - the 07/31/2011 at 6:56pm<b>Lorysa</b> - the 07/31/2011 at 6:10pm

quraishakrueger's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

See all of quraishakrueger's badges

quraishakrueger's favorite FMLs

Today, I ran into one of my teachers from high school. When I told her I just recently graduated college and was starting graduate school in the fall, she said "you don't have to lie, some people just are not cut out for college. There is no shame." I wasn't lying, I graduated with honors too. FML

#15142777
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31175) - you deserved it (2551)

On 02/27/2011 at 7:29pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my mom got me a job working for the man she's cheating on my dad with. My dad doesn't know that she's cheating, and my mom doesn't know that I know. It's just awkward. FML

#15136903
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49659) - you deserved it (3820)

On 02/27/2011 at 7:39am - misc - by awkward (woman) - Finland (Southern Finland)

Today, I married a wonderful man. Even though both of us were no longer virgins, we decided to wait until marriage to sleep together. He just told me I was the worst he's ever had. FML

#15133415
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47619) - you deserved it (12502)

On 02/27/2011 at 12:18am - intimacy - by newlywed - United States (Utah)

Today, I found out why my cell phone has been going missing every night for the last few months. My sister has been "borrowing" it so she can hold it against her crotch and repeatedly push the vibrate button. FML

#15127410
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56370) - you deserved it (4897)

On 02/26/2011 at 3:19pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my fiancé and I were cuddling on the couch watching TV when we started kissing. As I crawled onto his lap and started to unzip his pants, he said, "You're blocking the TV." FML

#15114672
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36360) - you deserved it (6334)

On 02/25/2011 at 1:36pm - intimacy - by unwantedlove (woman) - France

Today, I took a picture of myself and put it on Facebook. After I did so, I realized that in the background, you can see my crush's Facebook page up on my laptop. He tagged himself. FML

#15105515
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16410) - you deserved it (47947)

On 02/24/2011 at 7:37pm - misc - by verasam01 (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I went to Victoria's Secret to get fitted for a new bra since mine weren't fitting properly. To my amazement, I wasn't a 32A, but a 32AA. I might as well have craters on my chest. FML

#15103887
462 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34200) - you deserved it (5063)

On 02/24/2011 at 5:09pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I had to sell my phone to pay for the phone bill. FML

#15087655
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21214) - you deserved it (26399)

On 02/23/2011 at 4:18am - money - by suzyyy (woman) - Netherlands (Noord-Brabant)

Today, after some passionate love making with my husband, I accidentally farted on his leg. He shrieked and frantically began shaking his leg while screaming, "Get it off! Get it off!" FML

#15079652
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22162) - you deserved it (33929)

On 02/22/2011 at 4:02pm - intimacy - by CutieBooty (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I got up in the middle of the night to get a glass of water. I felt something get caught in my throat so I coughed and spluttered a bit. When I turned on the lights I discovered I'd coughed up a cockroach. FML

#15075987
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48608) - you deserved it (4443)

On 02/22/2011 at 7:25am - misc - by no name -

Today, I had to get into my house via the dog flap because my mom changed the locks. FML

#15029276
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30009) - you deserved it (4195)

On 02/18/2011 at 4:18pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I brought home a ukulele I had just bought. Excited, I showed my dad. He then looked at me, smirked, and said "Just like everything else you have, it's a bit smaller than normal." FML

#15024724
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32971) - you deserved it (5286)

On 02/18/2011 at 2:55am - misc - by Austyn -

Today, at the library, somebody left themselves logged in to Facebook on a public computer after they had left. Trying to teach them a lesson, I updated their Facebook status to something outrageous. That's when they came back to the computer after getting something from the printer. FML

#15005478
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6182) - you deserved it (60695)

On 02/16/2011 at 6:16pm - misc - by fail (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my girlfriend said "It's funny how every time we have sex I'm wearing these panties." We've been having sex every day for the last six days. FML

#15002281
252 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47299) - you deserved it (6439)

On 02/16/2011 at 12:51pm - intimacy - by Lovenem (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I woke up to a bloody nose. Instead of rushing to the bathroom, I creatively dripped the blood over a knife for photography class because the assignment was to show emotion. So many of the students and faculty were disturbed that I'm now forced to talk to the school psychologist. FML

#15000344
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25755) - you deserved it (38679)

On 02/16/2011 at 7:56am - misc - by rhartnett11 -



FML's blog

  • Pauline's illustrated FML
  • Come on, no need to make that face ! Yep, it's sadly the last, mournful days of Summer. People are packing up their beach balls and flip flops, putting their caravans back into storage and trying to forget…

Friday 28 August 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: