This member hasn't filled in their description.
quraishakrueger's FML badges
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
It’s in the can
Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!
quraishakrueger's favorite FMLs
Today, on the bus, a delusional old man had an extremely long conversation with me, referring to me as "Leslie" and talking about "our childhood together". Not wanting to hurt his feelings I played along. At his stop he got up and grinned at me, saying "I'm kidding. I never knew a Leslie in my life. Nice rack." FML
by Anonymous / 06/26/2011 at 2:12am / United States (Indiana) / Transportation
by KillMeNow / 06/06/2011 at 2:27am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by e_edge / 06/05/2011 at 2:48am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 05/31/2011 at 7:21am / Intimacy
by trev / 05/30/2011 at 12:12pm / United States (Rhode Island) / Health
by Jess / 05/30/2011 at 11:46am / United States / Miscellaneous
by skigal24 / 05/30/2011 at 10:59am / United States (Illinois) / Health
Today, I was catching the bus to my new job. While waiting at the lights, I decided to play the staring game and ended up staring at a woman in the car next to the bus for ages, really creeping her out. It turns out she's my new boss. FML
by milkymoo / 05/29/2011 at 9:45pm / Cyprus / Work
Today, my girlfriend and I were taking a shower together. We were fooling around when she takes the shower head and starts spraying my penis with it. I asked her "what are you doing?" Her response: "I'm watering it to make it grow." FML
by Anonymous / 05/29/2011 at 10:04am / United States / Intimacy
by Derp-A-Herp / 05/27/2011 at 1:46am / United States (Texas) / Love
by Anonymous / 05/26/2011 at 1:54pm / United States (Wyoming) / Miscellaneous
Today, my 3-year-long dry spell was about to end. A lovely lady over for dinner, good food, wine and lots of laughs. Things heated up nicely in the bedroom when a playful wrestle made my bed shift, snapping two of its legs. The bed collapsed, totally ruining the mood. The dry spell continues. FML
by Badaboom / 05/23/2011 at 6:54am / Netherlands (Zuid-Holland) / Intimacy
Today, my girlfriend made me watch six hours of "Glee" with her. I don't know what I hate the most, the fact that I actually sat there and watched it or that I'm angry at Finn for breaking up with Rachel. FML
by why me / 05/22/2011 at 7:09pm / Geek
by Anonymous / 05/22/2011 at 4:31pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by hahanosirr / 05/21/2011 at 4:02pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Intimacy
- Today, we have six people living in a two bedroom apartment. This is going to last for 3 months. FML Today, is my birthday! Instead of enjoying my nice surprise birthday party my roommates threw me,… Today, my boyfriend accidentally locked me out for 3 hours, in 90 degree heat, beside a trash fire,…
- Today, on the road in China, I committed a small offense. A cop saw me, stopped me and told me that… Today, at 11:30 p.m., after a 5-hour train journey to get back to Paris carrying a suitcase that’s… Today, I’m a French teacher in Ukraine, and in class we were debating gun legislation. In order to…