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quantumflux22's FML badges
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.
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quantumflux22's favorite FMLs
Today, when I got home, I went into my room to find a Bratz doll and a Ken doll laying naked, on top of each other on my bed. Attached to them was a note that stated, "Please, use your imagination and find other ways besides porn to get excited. The computer keeps getting viruses. Love, Mom." FML
by sydysyd / 11/21/2010 at 6:43pm / United States (Washington) / Intimacy
Today, I got my science test back. I thought I did a horrible job on it, but only three were circled. I was happy but doubtful that I did so well, so I asked my teacher just to make sure. He said it was faster to circle the correct answers. FML
by lovemyteacher / 11/14/2010 at 12:33am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, at work, I accidentally walked into a meeting at which the whole company was there but me. The meeting was about how they could legally fire me while paying as little severance as possible. I'm the CEO and the founder of the company. FML
by everythingWASperfect / 11/13/2010 at 9:43am / Canada (Ontario) / Work
by blueheron93 / 11/13/2010 at 9:25am / Germany (Hessen) / Kids
by Anonymous / 11/13/2010 at 2:14am / United States / Intimacy
Today, I went to the waterpark and my kids were fighting so I grounded them both. We concluded the day by boogey boarding on a mechanical wave. There was so much water I didn't realize my boobs had completely fallen out of my bikini. As revenge, my kids didn't tell me. FML
by sandyseashells10 / 11/13/2010 at 1:29am / United States (Colorado) / Kids
Today, my six year old daughter discovered the family's pet rabbit in the basement freezer. The rabbit had died almost a year ago, and we'd stored it in the freezer, intending to bury it later. Here's to the trauma of losing the family pet. Twice. FML
by Anonymous / 11/12/2010 at 1:23pm / United States / Animals
Today, I was sitting at a traffic light when a cute girl appeared at the side of the road. I sat and watched her until she had crossed, when I realised that I had missed the light. A large queue of cars had built up behind me, yet none of them used their horn because I was driving my police car. FML
by Anonymous / 11/10/2010 at 10:29am / United Kingdom (York) / Transportation
by Anonymous / 11/09/2010 at 12:32am / United States (New York) / Kids
Today, my stalker - an annoying guy who's dedicated the past three years of his life to stalking me at every turn - somehow got a hold of my number and started texting me at 10pm about how I have no life. FML
by nolife / 11/05/2010 at 7:14pm / United States (California) / Love
by Anonymous / 11/05/2010 at 5:09pm / United Kingdom (Birmingham) / Animals
by Anonymous / 11/04/2010 at 7:54pm / United States (Texas) / Kids
by mr_p / 11/01/2010 at 3:39pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
Today, I met my roommate for the first time. I walked in the door to see him in full Roman gladiator gear, screaming at the computer because he lost 18 knights. He also told me he wakes up every 3 hours to make sure his army is still intact. FML
by Anonymous / 10/20/2010 at 3:00am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
Today, whilst I was working in McDonald's, a customer threw their Quarterpounder at me because it had pickles and he said he didn't want any pickles in his burger. I didn't even serve him. I'd just started my shift. FML
by Anonymous / 08/18/2010 at 6:31am / United Kingdom (London) / Work
- Today, I received an e-mail from my girlfriend's parents telling me that all the dirty e-mails I've… Today, I was diagnosed with strep throat. My mom wasted no time accusing me of whoring around and… Today, while enjoying a truly epic move from my wife in the hotel shower, I managed to accidentally…