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quantumflux22

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quantumflux22
  • Town/Country : Winnipeg, Canada
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 734
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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quantumflux22's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

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quantumflux22's favorite FMLs

Today, a man pulled me violently into an alleyway and informed me I was being mugged. Being a body-builder, I said, "Oh yeah? I dare you." He kicked my ass in a matter of seconds, stole my wallet, then farted on my bruised face. He called me a wimp. FML

#14965591
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10348) - you deserved it (36053)

On 02/13/2011 at 10:25pm - misc - by NotAsToughAsHeThinks (man) - United States (Montana)

Today, my mum got an electric car. It's so quiet that we could hear the bones of my cat break as we reversed over it on the driveway. FML

#14919566
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46721) - you deserved it (6189)

On 02/10/2011 at 5:58am - animals - by flattened -

Today, I was attacked by clowns at work. I don't work at the circus. FML

#14894865
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24302) - you deserved it (2673)

On 02/08/2011 at 11:27am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, while in my room sleeping, my little brother deemed it necessary to come in and drop a book on my face. When I sat up with a now bloody nose, he looked at me, pointed, and said "You've just been facebooked" and ran away giggling. FML

#14806356
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37328) - you deserved it (7338)

On 02/02/2011 at 12:57am - kids - by Malakai - United States

Today, a cop pulled me over because there was a sign hidden behind a tree that said "No left turn". As I was getting my ticket, I watched as three cars turned left. The cop saw them, laughed, and said, "I guess you're the unlucky one." FML

#14764680
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31671) - you deserved it (2429)

On 01/29/2011 at 9:20pm - misc - by copper - United States (Texas)

Today, I got home from working late and decided to write a cute email to my girlfriend since I haven't seen her in two weeks. I was about to finish it off when my door swung open, and in a panic, I opened another tab to hide my email. It was porn. FML

#14743872
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8900) - you deserved it (28793)

On 01/28/2011 at 2:59pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, I woke up to my new roommate staring at me, just a few inches from my face. She then told me how easy I would be to kill in my sleep. Then she stood up, naked from head to toe. FML

#14719810
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35207) - you deserved it (2973)

On 01/26/2011 at 12:40pm - misc - by 123roomielover (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, in the middle of the night, my girlfriend whispered "Are you asleep?" I chose not to respond, to see what she'd do. She then let rip a loud, stinking fart, giggled, and went back to sleep. FML

#14610611
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10777) - you deserved it (27388) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 4:53am - misc - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, my dad’s best friend, who has been his business associate for the past 28 years, took me to a Star Wars store for my 18th birthday. He put on a Darth Vader helmet, and imitating his voice, said: "I am your father." I laughed. It wasn’t a joke. FML

#14610612
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36552) - you deserved it (2261) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 4:53am - misc - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, I'm getting over strep throat. The antibiotics they gave me make me have diarrhea unless I eat yogurt in between each pill. That wouldn't be so bad if I wasn't lactose-intolerant. Yogurt gives me really bad gas. So I have to choose between painful gas or diarrhea. FML

Today, I was playing hide and seek with a few friends. I hid in the bathroom, under the sink in a cabinet. I ended up having to sit there quiet as a mouse while my grandfather took an incredibly long and vile dump. I was too afraid to move. Let's just say he didn't rush it. FML

#14272041
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28536) - you deserved it (8181)

On 12/20/2010 at 12:09pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I found out that my girlfriend's parents offered her a trip to Europe if she dumped me. She accepted, and broke up with me. Her parents were lying. FML

#14271579
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31712) - you deserved it (2609)

On 12/20/2010 at 11:15am - love - by pinkfloyd777 -

Today, my boyfriend thought it would be funny to speak Parseltongue to my vagina to "prepare the Chamber of Secrets for entry". FML

#14190460
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33518) - you deserved it (8030)

On 12/13/2010 at 12:35pm - intimacy - by Wisconsin love - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I found my iPhone. Too bad it was when I was getting my clothes out of the washer. FML

#14108522
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8886) - you deserved it (17616)

On 12/06/2010 at 3:31pm - misc - by Kris - United States

Today, I caught my daughter attempting to stick pencils up our cat's butt. FML

#14029442
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31686) - you deserved it (3698)

On 11/29/2010 at 10:03pm - kids - by Laura -



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