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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1041
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About pyromaniac9 : I like messaging random people.

pyromaniac9's page activity

Visits<b>DavidGraves3</b> - the 11/22/2016 at 8:14pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 11/21/2016 at 11:54am<b>tiredstudent</b> - the 11/20/2016 at 9:17pm<b>Juls464</b> - the 11/19/2016 at 9:32pm<b>monyluv1</b> - the 11/18/2016 at 9:20pm<b>wheresmymary</b> - the 11/16/2016 at 11:46pm<b>hmrhoades</b> - the 11/16/2016 at 12:03am<b>saruhhh</b> - the 11/14/2016 at 2:19pm<b>Tiaxlnr</b> - the 11/14/2016 at 10:19am<b>sweetie808</b> - the 11/13/2016 at 5:03pm<b>Beautymarked</b> - the 11/13/2016 at 4:48pm<b>TheyKilledKemmy</b> - the 11/12/2016 at 8:24pm<b>caroline43872</b> - the 11/07/2016 at 5:27am<b>whatahatuis</b> - the 11/06/2016 at 7:10pm<b>angiesluvstacooo</b> - the 11/06/2016 at 12:03pm<b>ThePaperDragon</b> - the 11/03/2016 at 9:33pm<b>hardesty2904</b> - the 11/03/2016 at 3:54pm<b>backyardhulk</b> - the 11/03/2016 at 7:22am

Fucked!<b>platypus546</b> - the 09/19/2016 at 12:38pm<b>fishinpink</b> - the 09/06/2016 at 8:20am<b>emlizcat</b> - the 06/20/2016 at 6:44am<b>im_a_squid</b> - the 04/26/2016 at 2:40pm<b>shebewoofle</b> - the 03/28/2016 at 12:36pm<b>Xx_dankdoge_xX</b> - the 01/10/2016 at 12:24am<b>W31rdG1rl</b> - the 01/05/2016 at 3:35pm<b>xsaladsandwich</b> - the 09/02/2015 at 10:36am<b>LadyLuck93</b> - the 08/04/2015 at 1:16am<b>TeenieRee_2032</b> - the 06/19/2015 at 8:36am

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pyromaniac9's favorite FMLs

Today, my son had a secret party. At first I was mad, then I had a complete and total Incredible Hulk meltdown when I realized that he had opened a bottle of very expensive whisky, originally bottled by my great great grandfather in Scotland, and used it as a mixer with fucking Pepsi. FML

by Angus / 09/17/2015 at 3:48pm / France / Kids

Today, I had to call a parent and tell them that their special needs daughter is pregnant. FML

by Anonymous / 06/23/2015 at 11:16pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to say to my 23-year-old son that it's not a compliment to tell a woman that he wants to jam his cock down her throat. FML

by dadoftheyear / 05/06/2015 at 11:27pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I got banned from my favourite online video game for calling a person on my team a "Baked Potato". FML

by NoCnNoJustice / 04/17/2015 at 9:49am / Australia (Queensland) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my colleagues were excitedly talking about going for drinks after work. I heard one of them ask, Is Sam coming?' and shortly after leave without me. I'm Sam. FML

by Sam / 04/01/2015 at 7:37am / Netherlands (Groningen) / Work

Today, my girlfriend asked me to take my belt off as the buckle was hurting her leg. I didn't have a belt on. FML

by zetuga / 04/01/2015 at 3:40am / United Kingdom (Luton) / Intimacy

Today, on my day off, I received a call from my boss asking why I wasn't at work yet. After getting dressed and an hour-long train ride later, I got there only to find out that it was an April Fool's prank. I had to take the train back home. FML

by IDontGetPaidEnoughForThisShit / 03/31/2015 at 10:15pm / Australia (Victoria) / Work

Today, my dad and grandpa came to a charity event that I helped set up for people who have autism. I appreciated their support, until I heard my dad say "Man, some of these 'tards are pretty hot." and my grandpa replying "Yeah. Probably like dead fish in bed, though." FML

by ashamed / 12/13/2014 at 9:02pm / Australia (Queensland) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boss at my new call center job said he'd gotten complaints about me. Apparently I sound "too black" and it's "upsetting" some of our customers. I don't know what that even means, but my boss said I need to "tone it down or we're gonna have some problems". FML

by WTF / 12/03/2014 at 4:21pm / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, I almost got fired from work because a customer complained that I "threw up gang signs" at him. I was blocking the sun from my eyes. FML

by MaddyN / 07/08/2014 at 12:26am / United States (Oregon) / Work

Today, I was going to the bathroom at work. When I stood up, I noticed a little button on the side. I pressed it and the toilet flushed. I've worked there for nine months and just found out today that our toilets don't flush automatically. FML

by Anonymous / 06/16/2014 at 10:45pm / United States (Missouri) / Work

Today, one of my year 9 students finished the test an hour early. He decided to spend the time by "stealthily" whacking off. His entire desk was shaking in a silent room. FML

Today, someone on Instagram posted a picture of himself with gym lifting straps around his neck. I commented "autoerotic asphyxiation" and now a 250-pound bodybuilder wants to kill me. FML

by athletiks / 03/26/2014 at 6:39pm / United States (Washington) / Health

Today, my boyfriend dragged me to the local McDonald's, refusing to drive me home until he ate. When I mentioned how dangerous that part of town is, he stopped and went all Walter White on me in front of everyone, spouting lines like "I AM the danger" and "I'M the one who knocks, babe." FML

by that's methed up, darling / 08/16/2013 at 5:33pm / United Kingdom / Love

Today, I was at Basic Training for the Army when I got a package in the mail from my friends back home. You are required to open your packages in front of your drill sergeants and peers at Basic. When I opened it, it was a dildo. FML

by zackeryburch / 08/03/2013 at 9:01am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous