Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

powerkeep

Online | Search for a member

powerkeep

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 556
  • Number of comments : 19
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

powerkeep's page activity

Visits<b>oathkeeper99</b> - the 12/19/2014 at 2:29pm<b>AU_Lovebird</b> - the 12/18/2014 at 2:02am<b>littlekellilee</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 9:53am<b>Larissa24</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 3:18am<b>ihavenolifehaha</b> - the 12/09/2014 at 2:05pm<b>Murkyy</b> - the 12/08/2014 at 5:33pm<b>demi94</b> - the 11/26/2014 at 1:43pm<b>Meowdisen</b> - the 10/21/2014 at 6:31pm<b>DestinyNiya</b> - the 10/20/2014 at 10:35am<b>boring_boredom</b> - the 09/25/2014 at 11:28pm<b>azelk</b> - the 09/12/2014 at 3:00pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 07/27/2014 at 7:16am<b>krupa1017</b> - the 12/10/2013 at 2:05pm<b>PlutoPrincess222</b> - the 07/27/2013 at 4:10am<b>Zoeythedinosaur</b> - the 06/23/2013 at 3:48pm<b>eeppiicc</b> - the 05/22/2013 at 9:49pm<b>NinjaJellyfish</b> - the 05/14/2013 at 12:29pm<b>SouthernSweetie</b> - the 05/06/2013 at 9:06pm

powerkeep's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of powerkeep's badges

powerkeep's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend went down on me. I don't know why, but my mind wandered. He now thinks that he has the skills of a porn star, while I'm pretty sure that finally solving a mathematical problem I've been working on for a week caused me to orgasm. FML

#20963297
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48331) - you deserved it (8048)

On 11/19/2013 at 12:13pm - intimacy - by you+me-clothes=53>< (woman) - Austria (Wien)

Today, I witnessed an elderly lady getting mugged. I ran over to the guy mugging her and offered him the money in my wallet in return for him leaving her alone. The old lady snatched my money and ran away with the mugger. What the hell just happened? FML

#20733745
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53111) - you deserved it (8728)

On 06/18/2013 at 6:01pm - money - by No money, mo' problems - United States

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. She pulled down my trousers, saw my Poke-ball boxers, and absolutely lost it. I had to lie next to her in bed for the next 10 minutes hearing her howl with laughter while crying "Dickachu, I choose you!" FML

#20711208
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55156) - you deserved it (64261)

On 06/07/2013 at 3:10am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, the crazy son of a bitch who lives next door to me once again got into a loud, rather one-sided argument with his cat. 20 minutes later, he knocked on my door, asking if he could stay at my place for a couple of days. The look he gave me when I said no has me fearing for my life. FML

#20708003
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53450) - you deserved it (4048)

On 06/05/2013 at 6:09pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, I was visiting my new in-laws for the first time. During an awkward silence, I took my phone and figured I'd send my friend a text jokingly saying "Mayday, mayday! Somebody save me!" My mood lightened up a little and I felt quite well until my mother-in-law's phone beeped. Yep. FML

#20690847
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23000) - you deserved it (43997)

On 05/28/2013 at 7:12am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Norway (Sor-Trondelag)

Today, my doorknob broke. While trying to impress my dad and show that I can fix things for girls, I somehow managed to lock myself in my room, with the doorknob on the other side of the door. When my dad finally heard my screams, he let me out. He had to take the whole door off. FML

#20662901
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33983) - you deserved it (18431)

On 05/14/2013 at 1:03pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, at work at a farm, we got a new calf. It looked like it had to poop, but was having difficulty. About four hours later it still hadn't pooped. Turns out it was born without an actual butthole. It was there, just sealed up by skin. I literally had to cut this poor calf a new butthole. FML

#20617044
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (81294) - you deserved it (4207)

On 04/23/2013 at 10:01pm - animals - by halliemarie1818 - United States

Today, I learned that my parents are planning to divorce. My dad said, "I'll take Rachel." Rachel isn't even his daughter; I am. Rachel is my mom's daughter with her first husband. FML

#20567711
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37406) - you deserved it (2450)

On 03/31/2013 at 12:14am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I learned that my parents are planning to divorce. My dad said, "I'll take Rachel." Rachel isn't even his daughter; I am. Rachel is my mom's daughter with her first husband. FML

#20567711
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37406) - you deserved it (2450)

On 03/31/2013 at 12:14am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I learned that my parents are planning to divorce. My dad said, "I'll take Rachel." Rachel isn't even his daughter; I am. Rachel is my mom's daughter with her first husband. FML

#20567711
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37406) - you deserved it (2450)

On 03/31/2013 at 12:14am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I learned that my parents are planning to divorce. My dad said, "I'll take Rachel." Rachel isn't even his daughter; I am. Rachel is my mom's daughter with her first husband. FML

#20567711
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37406) - you deserved it (2450)

On 03/31/2013 at 12:14am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I learned that my parents are planning to divorce. My dad said, "I'll take Rachel." Rachel isn't even his daughter; I am. Rachel is my mom's daughter with her first husband. FML

#20567711
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37406) - you deserved it (2450)

On 03/31/2013 at 12:14am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I lit my beard on fire while trying to light a cigarette driving to work. I got fired from work when I got there because of my appearance. FML

#20507167
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12903) - you deserved it (40499)

On 02/14/2013 at 8:55pm - money - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Xmas illustrated FML
  • Here we go, final lap before Christmas is finally upon us. Although, you could say we've been subjected to quite a few strains of Christmas already. The decorations are up since mid-August, and certain family…

Friday 19 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: