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Today, I pulled someone over for speeding. He was only 10 over the speed limit so I gave him an $84 fine. It turns out he is a workplace Occupational Health and Safety officer and because I wasn't wearing my high visibilty vest while standing on the side of the road he gave me a $250 fine. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17937) - you deserved it (61042)
On 09/17/2009 at 6:57am - work - by auscop (man) - Australia (Western Australia)
Today, I was called by my son's school. They said he'd been forging my signature and comments in his reading book. He didn't forge them. I don't know what's worse: my handwriting looking like a 6 year old's, or being too cowardly to admit it. He has a week of lunch detention, but I still have my dignity. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6477) - you deserved it (79370)
On 09/16/2009 at 1:05pm - kids - by Mac - Sent from mobile version
Today, I was first in line at a stoplight. After five minutes, with a line of cars behind me, the light was still red. People behind me started honking, so I decided to just go. Halfway across the way, I was greeted by a camera flash. Nobody else went. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9161) - you deserved it (36689)
On 09/15/2009 at 8:16am - misc - by publicenemy (man) - United States (California)
Today, I got 4 "photo enforced" speeding tickets in the mail. It was from the car that was stolen from me three weeks ago. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31384) - you deserved it (1749)
On 09/11/2009 at 5:47pm - misc - by SlowLane (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I found out that on Wednesday, when I have 2 exams, I'm called to testify in court. If I go to court, I cannot make the exams. If I take the exams, I'll be held in contempt and arrested. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34329) - you deserved it (4156)
On 09/11/2009 at 2:10am - misc - by livin (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I was walking with my very attractive friend who I like a lot. She then told me that her roomate wouldn't be home tonight, and if I wanted, I could come over and study history. I didn't get it. I told her no thanks, that I was covered, and it was chem I needed to study. An hour later, I understood. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9730) - you deserved it (53695)
On 09/10/2009 at 7:17pm - love - by itisthedude (man) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I was driving my new car home when I came around a sharp turn to see a groundhog in the road. I kindly stopped and allowed it to cross when all of the sudden a car slammed into the back of mine. Then, another car went flying around us. That car hit and killed the groundhog. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32456) - you deserved it (8659)
On 09/10/2009 at 2:46pm - misc - by hatecolin (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I was driving in the left lane and was suddenly hit by a woman who was in the right lane. I ran off the road, taking out a fence and totaling my car. When the cops asked the woman what happened she responded, "My tom-tom told me to turn left." FML
I agree, your life sucks (42050) - you deserved it (1567)
On 09/10/2009 at 12:36pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Montana)
Today, I yelled at my dog for waking me up growling and barking out the window. He was doing it at the person stealing my car. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8001) - you deserved it (34349)
On 09/09/2009 at 9:21am - animals - by GoodDog (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, it was the first day of my job at a kindergarten. A boy fell over in the playground, so I ran over to see if he was OK. He got up and had a huge red mark on the side of his face. Shocked, I yelled "Oh my god, your face!" Turns out it's a very large port-wine birthmark and now he won't stop crying. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31964) - you deserved it (11398)
On 09/08/2009 at 12:42am - kids - by GhettoBeast (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)
Today, I found out my mom was getting remarried, to my dad. He's been in prison for five years because he pushed her out a window. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47188) - you deserved it (1530)
On 09/07/2009 at 10:28pm - misc - by kennedygeeee (woman) - United States (Georgia)
Today, at work, I accidentally got ink on my white dress shirt - right by my left nipple. Absentmindedly, I licked my finger and tried rubbing the stain out. When I looked up, the Vice President was staring at me in disbelief. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28809) - you deserved it (4638)
On 09/07/2009 at 6:19pm - work - by CMANIA (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I had a great time with a girl I liked. I asked her out and she said yes. She also said she cuts herself and if I ever broke up with her, I'll be responsible for her death. FML
I agree, your life sucks (57088) - you deserved it (4578)
On 09/07/2009 at 2:33am - misc - by BoredRunner42 - United States (California)
Today, I took a look at my boyfriend's videocamera. On it were several videos of me on the toilet. My boyfriend has been hiding the videocamera in the bathroom airvent, and taping me taking dumps for the past three months. FML
I agree, your life sucks (61804) - you deserved it (3172)
On 09/07/2009 at 2:05am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)
Today, when I was finished eating at McDonalds, I went to Shoppers to pick up a new toothbrush. I got back to my car only to find the windows smashed in. The only thing that was missing from my car was the Hello Kitty toy I got from McDonalds. Someone broke into my car for a 10 cent toy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38357) - you deserved it (2426)
On 09/06/2009 at 7:12pm - money - by effmylife (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Monday 20 May 2013
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