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porkchops878

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porkchops878

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 987
  • Number of comments : 11
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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porkchops878's page activity

Visits<b>wackadoodle103</b> - the 07/29/2013 at 6:39pm<b>aliadream</b> - the 04/03/2013 at 8:07pm<b>_1296</b> - the 02/07/2013 at 2:49pm

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porkchops878's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to my regular pharmacist of three months, and since I've always seen him on a crutch, I asked him how his leg was. His response: "Still missing". FML

#19903690
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21944) - you deserved it (6212)

On 07/07/2012 at 3:26am - misc - by sozzy - United States (California)

Today, I found out just how easy it is to be launched against the wall and sucker-punched into oblivion by a 200-pound former Marine turned professional body-builder. I discovered this after I told my fiancée's dad that we were expecting a baby. FML

#19867923
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25079) - you deserved it (4166)

On 06/29/2012 at 7:57pm - health - by fuckjuggalos (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was babysitting a little girl, and we were playing with dolls. After we fed her babies, we put them down for a nap. After a few minutes, I asked if they'd had enough sleep. She looked at me like I was a freak and said, "Uh, they're not real babies, you know..." FML

#19867200
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21311) - you deserved it (3128)

On 06/29/2012 at 4:48pm - kids - by friend (woman) - Israel (HaMerkaz)

Today, I shaved my legs. I received endless compliments about how great they looked, and how jealous all the girls were. I'm a guy who shaved them for a themed party, for which I dressed up as a girl. FML

Today, my parents felt the need to lecture me about how people who "smoke the reefer" are a "waste of life" and will never amount to anything. I was baked during the entire conversation, and actually ended up breaking down in tears, because I realized they were totally right. FML

#19840334
497 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8723) - you deserved it (44431)

On 06/24/2012 at 5:45pm - kids - by :( (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I was having a funny conversation with a guy I had met on Xbox. I told him the state I lived in, and he said, "Don't tell me that, I might stalk you." He wasn't kidding. He has somehow found out my phone number, and my address. He says he's going to send me flowers. FML

#19828397
272 comments

Today, I got into a huge fight with a girl at school. My mom and dad decided to punish me by letting my three older brothers pick out my wardrobe for the next week. FML

#19812569
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22768) - you deserved it (15134)

On 06/19/2012 at 12:38pm - misc - by Shelby - United States (Illinois)

Today, the Jehovah's Witnesses witnessed me whacking off on my couch. FML

Today, I was getting dirty with my boyfriend. It was the first time he had fingered anyone, and the only thing he said was, "It feels like the inside of my asshole." FML

#19810073
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42798) - you deserved it (3916)

On 06/18/2012 at 11:33pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my dad approached two girls at a store and told them I'd crashed into their car. They didn't find it funny either. FML

#19804025
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18182) - you deserved it (1582)

On 06/17/2012 at 9:57pm - misc - by annonymous - United States

Today, I kindly asked my boyfriend to shave his pubic hair to make oral sex more enjoyable for me. He declined, saying, "Think of it as flossing your teeth. I'm doing you a much needed favor." FML

#19803721
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28501) - you deserved it (5008)

On 06/17/2012 at 9:00pm - intimacy - by turnedoff (woman) - United States

Today, I went to see my dermatologist friend for a free consultation on my terrible acne. During my visit, she said I probably won't be getting any more pimples. Excited, I asked her how she could tell. She replied, "There's no more room for it." FML

#19787608
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26640) - you deserved it (2223)

On 06/14/2012 at 3:34pm - health - by ultraattitude - United States

Today, I woke up to the sight of my boyfriend playing a game on my iPhone with his penis. FML

#19781755
222 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30571) - you deserved it (4622)

On 06/13/2012 at 12:07pm - intimacy - by Rosie (woman) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)

Today, I came home to my boyfriend emptying his bowels into my aquarium. FML

#19775676
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27074) - you deserved it (2668)

On 06/12/2012 at 9:02am - love - by fledermausi (woman) - Hungary (Budapest)

Today, I came home to my boyfriend emptying his bowels into my aquarium. FML

#19775676
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27074) - you deserved it (2668)

On 06/12/2012 at 9:02am - love - by fledermausi (woman) - Hungary (Budapest)



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