poppyseed420

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Offline (the 11/18/2015 at 9:07am)

poppyseed420

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Thursday 25 July 1991 (25 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1833
  • Number of comments : 105
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

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poppyseed420's page activity

Visits<b>Dalboz</b> - 10 hours ago<b>sophiehelen</b> - the 02/07/2016 at 12:57pm<b>ananicosia</b> - the 01/31/2016 at 2:01pm<b>konan__</b> - the 01/04/2016 at 5:37am<b>mcronin</b> - the 11/21/2015 at 1:29am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/03/2015 at 11:59pm<b>kukumber</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 10:04pm<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 04/12/2015 at 2:38am<b>rocker_chick23</b> - the 10/13/2014 at 2:45pm<b>bmmondi95</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 9:15pm<b>Odao</b> - the 10/10/2014 at 7:13pm<b>paskievitchjack</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 1:10pm<b>blakebit</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 2:18pm<b>persianninja</b> - the 06/28/2014 at 5:44am<b>yellowchocobo</b> - the 03/27/2014 at 4:28pm<b>Rozza17</b> - the 03/27/2014 at 3:33pm<b>parism143</b> - the 03/22/2014 at 4:04pm<b>iLike2Teabag</b> - the 02/11/2014 at 5:03am

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 5:59am<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 04/12/2015 at 8:38am

poppyseed420's FML badges

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poppyseed420's favorite FMLs

Today, I failed hard at a color test. I thought it was a joke because most of the colors looked the same to me. Now I know why people laugh at my clothes color choices. FML

by Anonymous / 10/28/2013 at 12:51am / United States (California) / Health

Today, I was visiting my cousin's farm. Going out for a morning stroll, I took an apple with me to munch along the way. As I was eating it, I heard a distant thumping sound and was suddenly slammed into the ground. When I looked up, a horse was eating my apple. I got mugged by a horse. FML

by Anonymous / 08/14/2013 at 5:11am / United States (Florida) / Animals

Today, while at a pool party, I found out the reason I got my new, white bikini at such a bargain price; it goes completely transparent when wet. I only realized this after everyone was staring at me and whistling. FML

by bargainshopper / 10/16/2012 at 7:28am / South Africa (Western Cape) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend's transition into an annoying hipster is complete. It started with the not-really-necessary nerd glasses and the Mötley Crüe t-shirt, the final straw being the affected British accent. I'm considering where to dump the body. FML

by Anonymous / 09/24/2012 at 1:07am / Canada (British Columbia) / Love

Today, while working at the pet store, I had to feed the snakes. I'd thawed too many mice, so instead of wasting one, I fed it to our turtles. They decided to play tug of war with it, ripping it in half in front of several terrified children. FML

by Anonymous / 08/23/2012 at 12:50pm / Canada (Ontario) / Animals

Today, my recently ex-girlfriend's mother called me regarding her baby girl, saying, "If you mess with the chicklet, you mess with the momma hen." I have no idea what the hell this means for my future, but I'm a bit scared. FML

by roadkill0321 / 11/07/2011 at 2:20am / United States / Love

Today, I went to the hospital with a broken hand. They gave me a cast and some prescription pain medication. The only problem is that the bottle of medication is child-proof, I live alone and I can't open it with one hand. FML

by charlotte9338 / 10/23/2011 at 7:32pm / Canada (Ontario) / Health

Today, it was our 5th anniversary, so I decided to play a little joke on my girlfriend. Before I gave her the real present, an engagement ring, I gave her a gift-wrapped rolling pin instead. I ended up in the hospital. FML

by Awie / 10/20/2011 at 4:26am / Austria (Wien) / Love

Today, my friends told me all five of us should bring sleeping bags on our field trip; I brought mine only to find out they had told me that so they would get the four beds to themselves. They all 'forgot' to bring them and its only fair that I should sleep on the floor. We are here for a week. FML

by bananagurl4242 / 07/16/2011 at 1:34am / United States (Oklahoma) / Holidays

Today, my boyfriend tried to tell me that he was worried our child might not be mine because he was cheating on me when I got pregnant. FML

by Anonymous / 06/29/2011 at 7:52pm / United States (Indiana) / Intimacy

Today, in science, we were studying reproduction. Our teacher was reading out the notes and claimed that 'the female's penis stiffens to enter the male's vagina.' I'm supposed to be learning stuff from this woman. FML

by girlshavepenises / 06/28/2011 at 2:39am / New Zealand (Auckland) / Intimacy

Today, my daughter turned 18. She decided to use this day to tell me everywhere her and her boyfriends have had sex in my house to get revenge for being overprotective. FML

by Anonymous / 06/01/2011 at 2:06pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my professor's son died in a car accident and class has been cancelled until further notice. All my friends were delighted and cheered about it in front of me. I was dating my professor's son. FML

by Anonymous / 02/10/2011 at 1:38pm / Ireland (Dublin) / Miscellaneous

Today, as I left my house, the front door slammed shut behind me, causing an entire roof-length of snow to slide over the edge and land directly on my head. FML

by snowball / 12/29/2010 at 6:32pm / Switzerland (Zurich) / Miscellaneous

Today, I visited my vacation cabin. I've been planning to sell it, and it was in perfect condition when I last visited about 6 months ago. I walked in the door to find the floor covered in muddy pawprints and bloody remainders of meals. It appears some bears moved in during my absence. FML

by screwthewilderness / 10/04/2010 at 2:46am / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous