Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

pokefan813

Offline (the 04/03/2014 at 1:37am) | Search for a member

pokefan813

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 13 August 1997 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1230
  • Number of comments : 277
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 18 posted

About pokefan813 : I haven't been on this site for about 2 years now. Funny how time flies. ._.

My favorite commenters ( no particular order) are:
Docbastard
Kyleekay
Ebonyirony
Noorfml
Predix
Walmartpaysme

pokefan813's page activity

Visits<b>WoldowJR</b> - the 09/11/2014 at 8:44am<b>AHotCupOfCoffee</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 6:24pm<b>vivian_rae</b> - the 08/20/2014 at 9:55pm<b>hannah_bug28</b> - the 08/14/2014 at 11:51am<b>DarksideDoll</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 11:34pm<b>stormcreator</b> - the 08/07/2014 at 1:17am<b>Vitrolicz</b> - the 07/31/2014 at 3:07pm<b>yoursmileishawt</b> - the 07/11/2014 at 2:44am<b>silverfox323</b> - the 07/11/2014 at 2:23am<b>anormalperson</b> - the 07/11/2014 at 2:18am<b>tchatfield9413</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 2:57pm<b>LovelyStones</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 9:28pm<b>melody309</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 9:31pm<b>FanOfAnimations</b> - the 06/14/2014 at 8:41am<b>GarJon13</b> - the 06/03/2014 at 5:51pm<b>Eivana</b> - the 05/31/2014 at 3:35pm<b>Spellsman</b> - the 05/21/2014 at 5:52pm<b>YashiMoshi</b> - the 05/10/2014 at 10:08pm

pokefan813's FML badges

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

See all of pokefan813's badges

pokefan813's favorite FMLs

Today, my dad saw on TV that in some parts of Africa, it's not uncommon for people to attach make-shift flamethrowers to their cars to defend against carjackers. He's now lost his mind and is forcing me to help him put one together to scare off Jehovah's Witnesses. FML

#20124199
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17721) - you deserved it (1998)

On 10/19/2012 at 5:39pm - misc - by Watchtower? More like fortress. (man) - Norway (Oslo)

Today, I woke up after having a dream which included sex with a very hot guy. I realized it's about time I get laid, because the hot guy was Brock from Pokémon. FML

#20119984
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30364) - you deserved it (6122)

On 10/16/2012 at 6:59pm - intimacy - by L (woman) - Norway (Sor-Trondelag)

Today, after great sex with my boyfriend, I lay in my bed while he went to get a drink from downstairs. Hearing someone come up, I shouted out as a joke, "Damn babe, I'm covered in cum, was there a hole you didn't fill?" It wasn't my boyfriend, it was my dad. FML

#20109762
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16133) - you deserved it (60953)

On 10/09/2012 at 10:32pm - intimacy - by cumhole (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was pulled over. The cop stated that he "couldn't see" me because I had "blended in with the dark car background", and that it looked like no one was driving. I was literally pulled over for being black. FML

#20068526
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44559) - you deserved it (3887)

On 09/12/2012 at 3:00am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I told a girl that she had very pretty eyes. I then had to rinse pepper spray from my own. FML

#20059533
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22284) - you deserved it (2287)

On 09/05/2012 at 9:34pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, I fainted during my sister's wedding because my dress was too tight. When I woke up, she slapped me hard across the face. Why? Because I "took all the attention away" from her. FML

#20041726
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24377) - you deserved it (6842)

On 08/25/2012 at 9:58pm - health - by brylynn - United States

Today, while I was at work, my wife sent me a few pictures of her in a new lingerie, to "spice up" my day. She didn't realize that I have iCloud turned on so I can share files with my colleagues. My boss and a dozen other employees received the same pictures. FML

#20040897
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11948) - you deserved it (22541)

On 08/25/2012 at 12:06pm - work - by Michael D. (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I met a girl I used to make fun of in high school. She was taking my fingerprints after I was arrested. FML

#20037281
216 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6388) - you deserved it (71642)

On 08/23/2012 at 9:42am - misc - by TheBeautifulOne (woman) - United Kingdom (South Ayrshire)

Today, my house got broken into. They just made a mess. I saw a note on the kitchen table that read "There's nothing good here. You have shitty stuff." FML

#20025968
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23876) - you deserved it (2640)

On 08/17/2012 at 3:45am - misc - by Sarah - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my fiancée showed me her wedding plans. It will be themed on one of her video games, the best man will be dressed as an alien warlord, and the vows talk about how we'll beat the odds and be blessed by the "Goddess Kalahira". Apparently, I have no say in this. FML

#20021119
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21549) - you deserved it (5432)

On 08/14/2012 at 6:50pm - love - by cestquoicebordel?? (man) - France

Today, I was at a concert. It was dark and everyone was singing and waving their lit-up phones in the air. I was having a great time, until someone snatched my £200 phone out of my hand. FML

#20016571
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18760) - you deserved it (10246)

On 08/12/2012 at 7:03am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, at work, I was forced to nod and smile as a pregnant, fifteen-year-old, brain-dead Jersey Shore wannabe cussed me out for being rude by using words from a "foreign language" during our conversation. I used the word "pretentious." FML

#20015372
314 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33364) - you deserved it (2061)

On 08/11/2012 at 3:37pm - work - by mikeissad (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I came out to my parents. I don't really fit any stereotype, I'm just an average guy who happens to be into guys. Ten minutes later, I overheard my mother say to my step-dad, "Should we redecorate his room pink?" FML

#20008307
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26973) - you deserved it (5664)

On 08/07/2012 at 8:11pm - misc - by ohai95 (man) - United Kingdom (West Sussex)

Today, I realized that whenever I use emoticons, I tend to make the same face in real life. My coworkers gleefully showed me various pictures with my tongue out, face scrunched up, and so on, while staring at my phone. They've already made their way around the office. FML

#19967913
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7837) - you deserved it (17651)

On 07/21/2012 at 12:24pm - misc - by dawn (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I found out my late grandfather left me a significant amount of money in his will. I thought it was weird because he always acted like he hated me. When I got the envelope, there was $500,000 inside, all in Monopoly money. FML

#19961966
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34437) - you deserved it (3002)

On 07/20/2012 at 1:13am - money - by Rachel - United States



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: