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planetsmurf's favorite FMLs
by I'm stupid / 11/25/2012 at 10:08am / United States (Illinois) / Health
by Jocelyn / 11/25/2012 at 2:12am / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous
Today, my "friend" thought it'd be absolutely hilarious to use my phone to text my girlfriend, bragging that I'd found a new "slampiece" and that she's "fukcin dumpd". Now I'm single, her dad keeps making threatening calls to me, and nobody will even listen to my side of the story. FML
by jakeson12 / 11/23/2012 at 7:38pm / United Kingdom (Dundee City) / Love
by Jo / 11/21/2012 at 12:42am / United States (California) / Geek
Today, after finally falling asleep, my boyfriend woke me up and got extremely mad at me. My offense? My pillow was touching his side of the bed. After yelling at me, he's now sleeping on the couch, and I'm lying in bed wide awake. FML
by Anonymous / 11/11/2012 at 5:26am / United States (Virginia) / Love
Today, I was playing Apples to Apples with my girlfriend and a few others. The card that was drawn was labeled "pathetic". Among other cards that were laid down in attempts to be similar to "pathetic" was my girlfriend's card. She won with a create-a-card labeled "my sex life". FML
by anonymous / 11/10/2012 at 6:02am / United States / Love
Today, I was told I look like a Simpson. I don't have blond hair, or any of the features of them. So I asked which one. I was told Homer because we both could use Weight Watchers and an education. FML
by Kyle / 11/09/2012 at 1:57am / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 11/07/2012 at 10:44am / United States / Miscellaneous
by stuck / 11/07/2012 at 10:00am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Money
Today, I woke up with a vague memory of buying something last night while drunk. According to my credit card summary I made a $270 purchase from a home shopping channel. I guess in 5-7 days I'll find out what it was. FML
by fnfantastic / 11/04/2012 at 11:37am / United States (Indiana) / Money
by Midnightpearls / 11/02/2012 at 11:39am / United States / Health
Today, I went to a big family dinner. I didn't realize I hadn't been invited until we were about to sit down to eat. There were 12 chairs, 12 plates, 12 forks, and 12 glasses. I was the 13th person to arrive. FML
by Anonymous / 10/31/2012 at 10:37am / United States / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 10/31/2012 at 2:18am / United States / Love
by poorkids / 10/31/2012 at 1:01am / United States (Washington) / Kids
by Wubba87 / 06/27/2012 at 6:32am / United Kingdom (Liverpool) / Work
- Today, the baby I nanny peed all through my clothes. I can't take a shower or change my clothes for… Today, both of my parents made me teach them how to use snapchat. I later found out they were using… Today, my best friend begged me to go with him to have his wisdom teeth removed, and to make sure…