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plaguer

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plaguer

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plaguerplaguer
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 27 March 1993 (21 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 6103
  • Number of comments : 170
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About plaguer : Red haired metal head gore whore video game girl. I make coffee and sell books for a living. My boyfriend is better than yours.

plaguer's page activity

Visits<b>arano</b> - 15 hours ago<b>kellilynn</b> - 15 hours ago<b>insanecutie</b> - 23 hours ago<b>stuckintime</b> - the 01/25/2015 at 9:04am<b>BloodyDemon</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 1:02am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 01/22/2015 at 9:30pm<b>ilovesoccer1610</b> - the 01/22/2015 at 12:46pm<b>marcusaaaa</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 2:22pm<b>Mynamewontfi</b> - the 01/16/2015 at 4:47pm<b>CuriousYel1ow</b> - the 01/13/2015 at 10:12am<b>camelotgrace</b> - the 01/10/2015 at 5:42am<b>Adeptus_Astartes</b> - the 01/09/2015 at 6:02pm<b>morondon000</b> - the 01/07/2015 at 9:51pm<b>enter______name</b> - the 01/03/2015 at 1:35am<b>sam9697</b> - the 01/01/2015 at 2:41pm<b>FoxHunt9119</b> - the 12/28/2014 at 8:29pm<b>tsplash3</b> - the 12/25/2014 at 3:34pm<b>Queen_Bitch69</b> - the 12/24/2014 at 5:10pm

Liked!<b>CuriousYel1ow</b> - the 01/13/2015 at 4:12pm

plaguer's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

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You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

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plaguer's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. I felt down, so I laid in bed and told my parents I needed some alone time. A couple of minutes later, one of them started blasting "All by Myself" so loud that I felt the floorboards vibrate. FML

#20420113
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34274) - you deserved it (3783)

On 12/25/2012 at 12:00am - love - by all by myself - United States (Alaska)

Today, my 14-year-old daughter came home after sneaking out and partying. She was totally drunk, and started crying on my shoulder because some boy named "Thomas" has a small dick, and she had to fake an orgasm. FML

#20419819
271 comments

I agree, your life sucks (82164) - you deserved it (25259)

On 12/24/2012 at 10:03pm - intimacy - by valnaj1 (woman) - Denmark (Syddanmark)

Today, as her parents were supposed to be out of town, I stayed over with my girlfriend, and we ended up in bed together. Later on, while poking through the fridge, I heard footsteps, so I said, "Didn't think you'd be walking after that." I closed the fridge and saw her dad. FML

#20418714
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45856) - you deserved it (25212)

On 12/24/2012 at 1:02pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. I was getting pretty horny, and I thought some dirty talk would turn him on. Amid my panting, I breathed the words, "Fuck me." He then stopped and said, "Excuse me, I don't like hearing that language." and wouldn't continue until I corrected myself. FML

#20418295
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49095) - you deserved it (10252)

On 12/24/2012 at 8:32am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, a woman at work was complaining about her weight. She looked pretty thin, so to make her feel better, I said that she looked small. She said "Well, you haven't seen me naked." For some reason, I replied, "Not that you know of." FML

#20417936
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15171) - you deserved it (35079)

On 12/24/2012 at 1:37am - work - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I took my child to the park. Having been there an hour, another mum came up to me and we started talking. She then told me that one kid had been harassing her children, pointing to my child. When she asked which one was mine I pointed to a random kid. It was hers. FML

#20415890
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16681) - you deserved it (46971)

On 12/23/2012 at 10:02am - kids - by Anonymous - Australia

Today, after sharing my first night in bed with my boyfriend, I woke up early, and decided to rouse him with some surprise oral. It didn't go so well; he woke up screaming and gasped, "OH MY GOD! I thought you were my cat!" before telling me to continue. FML

#20412240
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41865) - you deserved it (8183)

On 12/21/2012 at 8:16pm - intimacy - by anonymaiacciu (woman) - France

Today, I started a new job. I'm now trapped in a small office with a woman who says, "Oh my gravy!" constantly. In response to everything. FML

#20201125
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21372) - you deserved it (1822)

On 12/11/2012 at 9:53pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I had a presentation in French class. I was so nervous, the first thing I said when I got up there was, "Hola." FML

#20193303
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25127) - you deserved it (4781)

On 12/06/2012 at 12:35am - work - by SpanishInFrenchClass (woman) - United States

Today, my husband ran a nice warm bubble bath with extra bubbles. I undressed and slid down into the tub only to have the most ungodly pain go up my backside. Turns out he knocked his razor into the water when he added the bubbles. I now have two butt cracks. FML

#20181043
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28272) - you deserved it (1616)

On 11/27/2012 at 9:32am - misc - by Cracky - United States (Maryland)

Today, my cat was too overweight to get out of the litter box, so he gave up, and went to sleep. I had to pick him up out of his own waste and clean him up. FML

#20175044
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11512) - you deserved it (23933)

On 11/23/2012 at 10:10am - animals - by Jeanna S. - United States

Today, my friends and I were playing truth or dare game. It was late and we were drunk, so they dared me to run naked into my neighbor's yard while yelling, "Help! The pixies took my penis!" I ran screaming right into their big family reunion. FML

#20172584
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7367) - you deserved it (32442)

On 11/21/2012 at 4:06pm - misc - by nekkidness (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was severely chewed out by my boss because, according to him, I look down on him too often. I'm 6ft5. FML

#20162604
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23167) - you deserved it (1569) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 11/13/2012 at 4:23pm - work - by makiju - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was making out with my girlfriend, and things started getting pretty hot. That is, until I tried to remove her shirt. Somehow, I managed to grab her pajama shorts and give her a violent wedgie. FML

#20154996
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17251) - you deserved it (28063)

On 11/08/2012 at 1:25pm - intimacy - by shit.... (man) - Malaysia (Selangor)

Today, I decided to watch some porn to cheer myself up after having recently been dumped. Halfway through wanking the gibbon, I got a horrifyingly painful cramp in my foot, and cried out in pain. Ten seconds later, with my pants still down, my dad rushed in to see if I was okay. FML

#20135660
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24411) - you deserved it (13707)

On 10/27/2012 at 3:18pm - intimacy - by whoreticulturalist (man) - United Kingdom (Plymouth)



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