plaguer

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plaguer

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plaguerplaguer
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 27 March 1993 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 11226
  • Number of comments : 176
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About plaguer : Part time barista, tattoo parlor rest of the time. My dog's name is Bowser. I'm not naked in that first picture, sorry.

plaguer's page activity

Visits<b>TheTshirt</b> - 2 hours ago<b>IsathatSo</b> - 4 hours ago<b>TheDarkLight</b> - the 07/24/2016 at 9:51pm<b>MitchRapp</b> - the 07/19/2016 at 10:03pm<b>jbuckets_404</b> - the 07/19/2016 at 11:33am<b>whydough</b> - the 07/18/2016 at 5:56am<b>nicolai44</b> - the 07/16/2016 at 5:24pm<b>Cocoapelli</b> - the 07/15/2016 at 2:59pm<b>arkh_angel</b> - the 07/15/2016 at 1:02pm<b>Unlovable_Me</b> - the 07/15/2016 at 10:18am<b>Aky0n</b> - the 07/15/2016 at 5:19am<b>NNOTCHO</b> - the 07/15/2016 at 3:30am<b>sawtooth</b> - the 07/15/2016 at 1:51am<b>Destroyer_2_2</b> - the 07/15/2016 at 12:52am<b>smallandroid</b> - the 07/15/2016 at 12:35am<b>Much2Much4U</b> - the 07/14/2016 at 11:33pm<b>ARetardedSeal</b> - the 07/14/2016 at 11:09pm<b>maximus_prime</b> - the 07/14/2016 at 7:21pm

Fucked!<b>nicolai44</b> - the 07/16/2016 at 11:24pm<b>Cocoapelli</b> - the 07/15/2016 at 8:59pm<b>DeadxManxWalking</b> - the 07/13/2016 at 11:18pm<b>jbuckets_404</b> - the 06/08/2016 at 10:03am<b>Jonjon554</b> - the 05/16/2016 at 1:20am<b>alex_gen</b> - the 05/02/2016 at 9:03pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 05/02/2016 at 3:28pm<b>alphasmartass93</b> - the 05/02/2016 at 2:48pm<b>sugarshugar</b> - the 04/30/2016 at 7:29pm<b>stuckintime</b> - the 04/30/2016 at 2:29pm<b>tengo</b> - the 04/30/2016 at 6:29am<b>prophetsam</b> - the 04/29/2016 at 7:38pm<b>SorrowsReward</b> - the 03/17/2016 at 8:20am<b>SpawnofAthena</b> - the 03/15/2016 at 4:51am<b>sdlr32787</b> - the 03/12/2016 at 5:53pm<b>FFStepchild283</b> - the 03/12/2016 at 6:53am<b>DrSirSexyLegs</b> - the 03/08/2016 at 9:22am<b>Wane8822</b> - the 03/05/2016 at 5:27pm

plaguer's FML badges

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You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

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plaguer's favorite FMLs

Today, my mom accused my cat of being a "manipulator", and said that we should get rid of him. FML

by seriously / 05/24/2013 at 3:04am / United States / Animals

Today, my brother broke his mountain bike, so he stole mine, and managed to break it as well. Then he made some kind of franken-bike out of parts from both, and messed that one up too. FML

by jfc, how just how / 05/19/2013 at 3:56pm / United Kingdom (Milton Keynes) / Miscellaneous

Today, at work, I was trying to get the octopus out of its tank to transfer it to another one. It instantly latched to my face and sprayed ink all over me. My boss told me to stop playing with the animals. FML

by FenRackety / 05/10/2013 at 8:37am / Canada / Animals

Today, I woke up to the sound of my newborn screaming. I frantically hopped out of bed and stumbled into the nursery where I was met by the priceless sight of my five-year-old daughter attempting to breastfeed her understandably frustrated little brother. FML

by SkeetinKeaton / 05/06/2013 at 2:29am / United States / Kids

Today, I was out with my grandma when a pair of very shady guys approached us in the street, hands in their pockets. Without breaking stride, she pulled a knife out of her handbag and told them they'd better keep walking. They did. What the fuck, gran? FML

by emasculated 10000% / 05/04/2013 at 1:05pm / Sweden (Kronobergs Lan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I finally started exercising. I'm a rather obese person and I'm super pumped up to finally get off my lazy butt and lose some weight. Locking myself in my room, I first started with a very simple exercise: jumping jacks. I farted each time I jumped. I jumped 10 times. FML

by thatonesilentkidinclass / 05/04/2013 at 4:11am / Philippines (Batangas) / Health

Today, my wife shaved her pubic hair so that it resembles Hitler's mustache. She won't stop referring to it as "the Clitler". FML

by Anonymous / 05/02/2013 at 8:50pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, my sister texted me, saying she was about to go into surgery. It's been a long time coming, and we've both been worried about what could happen. I texted "good luck" back. My phone autocorrected it to "goodbye" and I didn't even notice. FML

by Anonymous / 05/02/2013 at 12:49pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my mum asked me, "Shouldn't you be cleaning your room?" On impulse, I replied, "Shouldn't you be in the kitchen?" I've never been hit so hard in my life. FML

by Anon / 04/22/2013 at 3:19am / Singapore / Miscellaneous

Today, my long-distance girlfriend drunk dialed me and told me she was horny. Surprised, I exclaimed, "You're horny?" without realizing my boss was right next to me. FML

by Wallz99 / 04/19/2013 at 2:00am / Pakistan (Azad Kashmir) / Intimacy

Today, at the exact moment that I leaned over to show my dad a picture on my phone, my boyfriend texted me: "I'm no weather man, but you can expect a few inches tonight." FML

by Anonymous / 04/17/2013 at 1:39am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my virginal girlfriend of a year graduated from veterinary school. She can shove her arm shoulder-deep up a cow's ass without blinking, but still feels too insecure to even touch my penis. FML

by Gurior / 04/16/2013 at 1:44pm / Canada / Intimacy

Today, when I was talking to my younger brother, he suddenly said "Oh, I was supposed to tell you that there's this girl who has a huge crush on you!" I asked who and he answered, "I totally forgot her name, that was like 2 months ago." FML

by MissedTheBoat / 04/14/2013 at 3:28am / Canada (Alberta) / Love

Today, I dressed up as Batman for a comic book convention. I was hit by a car on the way there by a man dressed up as the Joker for the same convention. FML

by ironies a b*tch / 04/13/2013 at 1:04am / United States (Illinois) / Transportation

Today, I was lying in bed with my girlfriend, when she reached over and twisted my nipples to the point of tears. I'm still not sure what in the name of Dawkins I did to deserve that. FML

by SoreNips / 04/12/2013 at 7:57pm / United Kingdom (Essex) / Miscellaneous