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plaguer

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plaguer

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plaguerplaguer
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 27 March 1993 (21 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 6145
  • Number of comments : 170
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About plaguer : Red haired metal head gore whore video game girl. I make coffee and sell books for a living. My boyfriend is better than yours.

plaguer's page activity

Visits<b>Arni792</b> - 5 hours ago<b>steve1122</b> - yesterday at 8:46am<b>patrickalamo</b> - yesterday at 4:13am<b>xEliteVenom</b> - yesterday at 12:00am<b>arano</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 6:53pm<b>kellilynn</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 6:47pm<b>insanecutie</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 10:24am<b>stuckintime</b> - the 01/25/2015 at 9:04am<b>BloodyDemon</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 1:02am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 01/22/2015 at 9:30pm<b>ilovesoccer1610</b> - the 01/22/2015 at 12:46pm<b>marcusaaaa</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 2:22pm<b>Mynamewontfi</b> - the 01/16/2015 at 4:47pm<b>CuriousYel1ow</b> - the 01/13/2015 at 10:12am<b>camelotgrace</b> - the 01/10/2015 at 5:42am<b>Adeptus_Astartes</b> - the 01/09/2015 at 6:02pm<b>morondon000</b> - the 01/07/2015 at 9:51pm<b>enter______name</b> - the 01/03/2015 at 1:35am

Liked!<b>patrickalamo</b> - yesterday at 10:14am<b>CuriousYel1ow</b> - the 01/13/2015 at 4:12pm

plaguer's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of plaguer's badges

plaguer's favorite FMLs

Today, my virginal girlfriend of a year graduated from veterinary school. She can shove her arm shoulder-deep up a cow's ass without blinking, but still feels too insecure to even touch my penis. FML

#20596452
230 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68799) - you deserved it (17898)

On 04/16/2013 at 1:44pm - intimacy - by Gurior - Canada

Today, when I was talking to my younger brother, he suddenly said "Oh, I was supposed to tell you that there's this girl who has a huge crush on you!" I asked who and he answered, "I totally forgot her name, that was like 2 months ago." FML

#20589493
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48843) - you deserved it (3877)

On 04/14/2013 at 3:28am - love - by MissedTheBoat (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I dressed up as Batman for a comic book convention. I was hit by a car on the way there by a man dressed up as the Joker for the same convention. FML

#20587443
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60722) - you deserved it (20262)

On 04/13/2013 at 1:04am - misc - by ironies a b*tch - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was lying in bed with my girlfriend, when she reached over and twisted my nipples to the point of tears. I'm still not sure what in the name of Dawkins I did to deserve that. FML

#20586964
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33699) - you deserved it (13089)

On 04/12/2013 at 7:57pm - misc - by SoreNips (man) - United Kingdom (Essex)

Today, my boyfriend and I went to the store to buy oranges and pick up a pack of condoms. When we were at the checkout counter, my boyfriend happily told the cashier, "The only way we can have sex is if we squeeze oranges all over our bodies." FML

#20583013
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52626) - you deserved it (11891)

On 04/10/2013 at 12:28am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I found an invisible ink pen. I drew on my arms, thinking nobody would see it. I had an allergic reaction to the ink, and I now have three very large, very visible, red penises on my forearm. FML

#20579781
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14786) - you deserved it (57996)

On 04/07/2013 at 8:30pm - health - by maturity - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I told my bald, goatee-sporting chemistry teacher that he looks like Walt from Breaking Bad. I quickly got sent to the principal's office and received a 3-day suspension for "slandering" my teacher by implying that he makes meth. FML

#20574865
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34159) - you deserved it (6011)

On 04/04/2013 at 4:07pm - misc - by me (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because I dropped our daughter. Our hypothetical daughter. Represented by a stuffed owl. FML

#20572997
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46762) - you deserved it (5551)

On 04/03/2013 at 9:32am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, a cute guy who works at the mall winked at me. When I met up with my boyfriend, I bragged to him about it. His response was, "Don't flatter yourself, he winked at me too." FML

#20550170
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31710) - you deserved it (15989)

On 03/18/2013 at 11:29pm - love - by amberrenee91 - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was dancing with an incredibly sexy man at a club. He was grinding on me when he leaned over and said, "If I was straight, I would make you my queen." FML

#20548252
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40167) - you deserved it (5740)

On 03/17/2013 at 8:10pm - love - by noooooooo (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my girlfriend was giving me head during the horror flick we were watching. Little did I know, my girlfriend isn't a big fan of horror films. It was during a sex scene that intensified the moment. The same sex scene from which emerged a sudden jump-scare. I now have bite marks on my penis. FML

#20547294
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28285) - you deserved it (49450)

On 03/17/2013 at 5:07am - intimacy - by Cliché... or Touché? -

Today, my boyfriend got angry and threatened to dump me, all because I wouldn't give in to his demands not to go to a birthday sleepover with my friends. He seriously thinks it's going to turn into some kind of lesbian orgy and that I'll cheat on him. Thanks, PornHub. FML

#20543365
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52061) - you deserved it (6694)

On 03/14/2013 at 11:43am - intimacy - by wow (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I held hands with the boy I like. Without thinking, I commented that his right hand is softer, as if he only used lotion on that one hand. And then we stood there in terribly awkward silence. FML

#20541635
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41926) - you deserved it (15719)

On 03/13/2013 at 12:57am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)

Today, our dog jumped on the bed while my fiancé and I were having sex, and let out the most horrific fart. My fiancé, like a gentleman, held my nose closed while he continued banging me. FML

Today, a technician from my ISP came to my house to replace my router. He asked for a glass of water, one thing led to another, and for some reason I'll never fully understand, we ended up having sex. Looks like porn logic is not so far off the mark after all. FML

#20537010
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21405) - you deserved it (61354)

On 03/09/2013 at 1:50pm - intimacy - by je_regrette_tout (woman) - Sent from mobile version



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