About plaguer : Part time barista, tattoo parlor rest of the time. My dog's name is Bowser. I'm not naked in that first picture, sorry.
plaguer's FML badges
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plaguer's favorite FMLs
Today, I experienced the most intense pain I have ever had in my life. I was eating blueberries when my sister made a comment which sent me into hysterics. The force of having a bullet-like berry violently shoot out your nostril is more painful than it sounds. FML
by Anonymous / 12/26/2011 at 4:41pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymoose / 12/25/2011 at 6:39am / Switzerland (Zurich) / Animals
by Anonymous / 12/21/2011 at 1:18am / Canada (Quebec) / Intimacy
by bathtime / 12/20/2011 at 11:32pm / United States (Kentucky) / Intimacy
Today, I dropped my 7-year-old son off at school. He decided to have fun and step out of my car screaming "Stranger danger" while running away and pointing at me. I then had to get out of my car to shut the door he'd left wide open. This caused 20 other kids to scream "Stranger danger" as well. FML
by dealingdave / 12/19/2011 at 7:24am / United States (Missouri) / Kids
by blondie101 / 12/09/2011 at 1:11am / United States / Miscellaneous
by skidmark / 12/08/2011 at 9:48am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
Today, some friends and I were pulled over on our way back from a party. We'd had a few drinks, so we tried to play it cool just in case we were over the limit. The cop didn't seem to want to breathalyze us, until my really high friend in the back seat said, "These are not the droids you are looking for." FML
by Notadrinkanddriveidiot / 12/07/2011 at 9:46am / United States / Miscellaneous
by wayne / 12/07/2011 at 5:28am / New Zealand (Auckland) / Miscellaneous
Today, my husband and I got into an argument. I tried to assault him with a laptop. He yelled, "Don't hit me with the computer." My apartment neighbor yelled through the wall, "Do what you gotta do, girl." FML
by Anonymous / 12/05/2011 at 9:31pm / United States / Love
Today, I played Taboo with my boyfriend and my conservative family. It was my boyfriend's turn and his word was "cherry". His only clue to me was, "I popped your..." He was the only one who found it funny. FML
by Anonymous / 12/04/2011 at 12:44am / United States (California) / Intimacy
by waterbottlehit / 12/02/2011 at 12:23am / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous
by unknown52 / 12/01/2011 at 9:02pm / Netherlands (Overijssel) / Health
by tireedddddd / 11/25/2011 at 11:24am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
- Today, my child support payment got sent to my daughter's father's other child's mother, so she not… Today, I realized that my favorite sex position is trying to sleep and hopes he finishes soon. FML Today, for her birthday my girlfriend wanted a night of long steamy sex. But her rarely being so in…