plaguer

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plaguer

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plaguerplaguer
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 27 March 1993 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 10506
  • Number of comments : 175
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About plaguer : Part time barista, tattoo parlor rest of the time. My dog is part reindeer, part fox.

plaguer's page activity

Visits<b>nickbuckley</b> - 12 hours ago<b>Jonjon554</b> - the 05/17/2016 at 12:23pm<b>waterless323</b> - the 05/17/2016 at 11:34am<b>CreepinCow</b> - the 05/11/2016 at 6:19pm<b>CamBamShamDaMan</b> - the 05/10/2016 at 11:34am<b>delichick</b> - the 05/06/2016 at 6:18pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 05/04/2016 at 3:58pm<b>frankmz</b> - the 05/04/2016 at 3:37pm<b>manuelg1095</b> - the 05/03/2016 at 1:49am<b>HelloKiittyy</b> - the 05/02/2016 at 7:47pm<b>sdlr32787</b> - the 05/02/2016 at 7:07pm<b>alex_gen</b> - the 05/02/2016 at 3:03pm<b>AnOriginalName</b> - the 05/02/2016 at 11:34am<b>Sandman0351</b> - the 05/02/2016 at 9:10am<b>OmgimBored</b> - the 05/02/2016 at 8:54am<b>alphasmartass93</b> - the 05/02/2016 at 8:48am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/02/2016 at 8:25am<b>jbuiel123</b> - the 05/02/2016 at 7:51am

Fucked!<b>Jonjon554</b> - the 05/16/2016 at 1:20am<b>alex_gen</b> - the 05/02/2016 at 9:03pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 05/02/2016 at 3:28pm<b>alphasmartass93</b> - the 05/02/2016 at 2:48pm<b>sugarshugar</b> - the 04/30/2016 at 7:29pm<b>stuckintime</b> - the 04/30/2016 at 2:29pm<b>tengo</b> - the 04/30/2016 at 6:29am<b>prophetsam</b> - the 04/29/2016 at 7:38pm<b>SorrowsReward</b> - the 03/17/2016 at 8:20am<b>SpawnofAthena</b> - the 03/15/2016 at 4:51am<b>sdlr32787</b> - the 03/12/2016 at 5:53pm<b>FFStepchild283</b> - the 03/12/2016 at 6:53am<b>DrSirSexyLegs</b> - the 03/08/2016 at 9:22am<b>Wane8822</b> - the 03/05/2016 at 5:27pm<b>tin_cup</b> - the 01/25/2016 at 7:05pm<b>emilyh7689</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 3:07am<b>joco4</b> - the 01/18/2016 at 6:43pm<b>2C0OL4SCH0OL</b> - the 10/31/2015 at 4:12pm

plaguer's FML badges

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of plaguer's badges

plaguer's favorite FMLs

Today, I was in a heated debate about climate change. I got so flustered that I forgot the word "volcano" and ended up calling them "exploding mountain things". End of the debate. Shame. FML

by WalkTheOtherWay / 01/31/2015 at 9:29pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had a sneeze attack while my nose was bleeding. Now my living room looks like a crime scene. FML

by MonsterProblems / 01/07/2015 at 2:07am / Croatia / Health

Today, on a first date with a guy, I spilled ice cream all over my pants. He bought me some more, and as I was thanking him, he said, "You've never had a guy treat you right, have you?" I said no and started crying. FML

by Soulara89 / 12/22/2014 at 8:28pm / United States (Florida) / Love

Today, while hanging out with this guy I'm interested in, we turned and made eye contact. We were face to face and I thought he was finally going to kiss me. He decided to lick my face from chin to forehead instead. FML

by qyx3lmnop24 / 12/20/2014 at 2:33am / United States (California) / Love

Today, my mom found my dildo, and got so angry that she beat me with it. FML

by Anonymous / 12/01/2014 at 12:55pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend broke the bed pretending to be a caterpillar. FML

by tine / 11/16/2014 at 4:44am / Australia (New South Wales) / Love

Today, I excitedly told my mom that I'm pregnant with my second child. She shot back, "You know what's a REAL achievement? Jacking your dad off in church last week without anyone noticing. Aim higher." I really didn't need to know that. FML

by jennabee97 / 11/08/2014 at 6:02pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids

Today, I took my girlfriend for what I thought would be a romantic horse-drawn carriage ride. We didn't expect the horse to die in the middle of it. FML

by subduedbeast / 10/27/2014 at 2:48pm / United States / Love

Today, I was giving lifeguard instructions to a couple of teens. When I quizzed them about what they should do when someone is choking, one of them said, "Take a step back" and winked at me. FML

by Australian Lifeguard / 10/21/2014 at 11:18pm / United States (Arizona) / Work

Today, I walked into my house and saw it was flooded. I went upstairs to the bathroom to see the toilet overflowing and my boyfriend holding my dog over it so he could drink it. My boyfriend said he didn't know what else to do. FML

by anonymous / 10/16/2014 at 4:53pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, coming home, I opened up my door to find my drunk boyfriend trying to teach our three baby parakeets to perch on his erect penis. FML

by facepalm / 10/15/2014 at 7:36pm / United States (Florida) / Love

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend in the missionary position. Once again, our cat decided to crawl onto his back and stare at me. FML

by Drafrica / 10/13/2014 at 6:20am / South Africa / Intimacy

Today, I got married. It was a beautiful ceremony with all of our family and friends. Too bad it ended with us leaving the reception before dancing even started, since my groom couldn't stop bawling his eyes out from all the stress. FML

by mdwillow / 10/12/2014 at 3:46am / United States (Alaska) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, as always, I have Tourette's syndrome. It causes me to occasionally make a beeping noise. My boyfriend just figured out that if he beeps back, it makes me beep again. He thinks it's hilarious and won't stop. FML

by Beeper / 10/11/2014 at 3:07pm / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, I was sitting on a bench at the local park, eating a banana. A guy old enough to be my grandfather walked by, turned to look at me, then said "Young man, I wish I were that banana." He walked away, and I almost blacked out choking on it in shock. FML

by Operation Yewtree here I come / 09/26/2014 at 4:40pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Miscellaneous