About plaguer : I'm the Devil, I love metal. Actually I'm just a normal girl named Rina. If you message me, please be aware I am not, nor will I ever be interested in you. I don't mind being your friend though. (I do mind, go away)
I'm an avid video gamer and a mommy to two perfect pugs.
Socialite
You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…
YDI master
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
Today, I got kicked in the crotch. It popped my cherry. I lost my virginity to a shoe. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47880) - you deserved it (4812)
On 09/19/2011 at 10:39am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, on my way to a concert, some guy told me I had cool sunglasses. I was about to thank him until he punched me in the face. I woke up with no sunglasses and no ticket. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27267) - you deserved it (2124)
On 09/18/2011 at 9:36am - misc - by incaseudidntkno - United States (Illinois)
Today, desperate after a very painful breakup, I poured my heart and soul out to my old teddy bear. When I finished, I asked what he would do in my situation. Right on cue, a gust of wind came through the window and sent him falling off the windowsill and crashing head-first onto the floor. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29276) - you deserved it (5426) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
Today, my neighbor declared his love for me via "the medium of interpretative dance." FML
I agree, your life sucks (21168) - you deserved it (2483)
On 09/02/2011 at 2:54am - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, my wife told our six year old daughter that the devil beats his wife whenever there's a rainbow. Now she won't stop crying. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26803) - you deserved it (2671)
On 09/01/2011 at 2:02pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I was out shopping when an old lady bumped into me and dropped her purse. Trying to help, I bent over to pick it up, at which point she battered the shit out of me, called me a "filthy thief" and threatened to open an umbrella in my ass. What the fuck has the world come to? FML
I agree, your life sucks (30519) - you deserved it (1872)
On 08/25/2011 at 5:17pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my brother told the family that if you pull on the dog's back foot then she always obeys. I later found my mom tugging on the dog's foot whispering "jump off a cliff" repeatedly. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20935) - you deserved it (1480)
On 08/20/2011 at 7:02pm - misc - by lala7 - United States
Today, the guy at Subway asked if I wanted to make my sandwich a footlong. I'm not sure what came over me, but before I realized what I was saying, I'd told him that I couldn't handle 12 inches. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20668) - you deserved it (6989)
On 08/14/2011 at 1:44pm - misc - by Username - United States (New York)
Today, I was using a public urinal when a man came up to use the one next to me. As he approached, he said, "Friendly spy plane inbound" and pretended to look at my knob. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20684) - you deserved it (1812)
On 08/12/2011 at 6:40am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, my son drew in Sharpie all over the wall, so I spanked him as punishment. When my boss came over for dinner, my son shouted, "Daddy made me take my punishment in the butt." FML
I agree, your life sucks (36282) - you deserved it (10747)
On 08/02/2011 at 12:58am - kids - by ohcrap - United States (Colorado)
Today, my six year old son came up to me with his arms spread and said, "I feel like a hug." I got really excited and hopeful because he is very anti-social and hates physical contact. As soon as I stood up to hug him he said "Feeling's gone" and walked away. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33973) - you deserved it (3821)
On 07/16/2011 at 9:28am - kids - by Rejected (man) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, my friends and I went to the park for some planking. Trying to find a daring spot, I climbed a tree and laid down on a branch. While I was waiting for my friends to take a picture, the branch gave out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7253) - you deserved it (40160)
On 07/14/2011 at 3:17pm - misc - by Stephanie - United States (California)
Today, I was hanging out with a guy that I really like. When he gave me a hug goodbye, he slid his hand into the back pocket of my jeans. It was glorious until I farted on his hand. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32434) - you deserved it (16294)
On 07/12/2011 at 1:09pm - misc - by couldntholdit (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my girlfriend and I were making out while she was laying on me. Her little brother walked in, saw us and yelled, "Mom they're swallowing each other!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (21170) - you deserved it (17390)
On 07/11/2011 at 5:08pm - intimacy - by tony456 (man) - United States (Vermont)
Today, I went to an amateur baseball game with some family and friends. When our team hit a home run, my grandpa took it upon himself to start screaming wildly, removing his prosthetic leg and waving it jubilantly in the air. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24567) - you deserved it (4471)
On 07/08/2011 at 9:24am - misc - by Username - United States
Friday 24 May 2013
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