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plaguer

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plaguer

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plaguerplaguer
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 27 March 1993 (21 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 5565
  • Number of comments : 170
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About plaguer : Red haired metal head gore whore video game girl. I make coffee and sell books for a living. My boyfriend is better than yours.

plaguer's page activity

Visits<b>mfaizsiddiqui</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 2:13pm<b>adrianvons</b> - the 12/13/2014 at 10:55am<b>Shadowvoid</b> - the 12/11/2014 at 11:07am<b>dreamsofdisney</b> - the 12/10/2014 at 11:39pm<b>shivamtrivedi</b> - the 12/07/2014 at 10:06am<b>vaxc</b> - the 12/02/2014 at 9:01pm<b>maxyutd</b> - the 11/27/2014 at 9:13pm<b>nightfire2258</b> - the 11/27/2014 at 12:45am<b>Zman2017</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 9:55am<b>youremyhouse</b> - the 11/18/2014 at 2:18pm<b>Daschundman</b> - the 11/18/2014 at 10:42am<b>JustForRetorts</b> - the 11/16/2014 at 10:36pm<b>annarcheer</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 10:13pm<b>lpaz</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 7:12pm<b>Trace01m</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 12:16am<b>baconsdelight701</b> - the 11/05/2014 at 5:10am<b>imshadyxo</b> - the 10/07/2014 at 1:44am<b>jgilmanx13</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 11:49pm

plaguer's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

You sure know how to party?

You posted a comment on the 31st of December between 11pm and 1am. Happy New Year!

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of plaguer's badges

plaguer's favorite FMLs

Today, while I was sleeping, apparently I rolled over towards my fiancé and told him "We gotta save the turtles!" and had a five seconds long fart. Now he won't stop making fun of me. FML

#20861263
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43104) - you deserved it (7344)

On 08/31/2013 at 2:04am - misc - by fartz (woman) - United States

Today, I was visiting my cousin's farm. Going out for a morning stroll, I took an apple with me to munch along the way. As I was eating it, I heard a distant thumping sound and was suddenly slammed into the ground. When I looked up, a horse was eating my apple. I got mugged by a horse. FML

#20836718
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54290) - you deserved it (6169)

On 08/14/2013 at 5:11am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, in the middle of examining me, my gynecologist suddenly took a sharp intake of breath and vomited on the floor. FML

#20826932
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56558) - you deserved it (15934)

On 08/08/2013 at 7:10am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Latvia (Jelgavas)

Today, I woke up to my girlfriend grinning at me, her hand on my junk. I grinned back, then looked down and saw blood smeared all over her hand and my junk. After I started screaming and crying, she laughed and said it was fake blood. She recorded everything. FML

#20820496
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68390) - you deserved it (9015)

On 08/04/2013 at 3:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I discovered that my wife named our kids after her former lovers. We have two sons and a daughter. FML

#20819538
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48687) - you deserved it (4870)

On 08/03/2013 at 11:29pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Delaware)

Today, I had to pull one of those toy stretchy hands out of my dog's butthole. It slapped me in the face when I finally got it out. FML

#20787584
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57223) - you deserved it (6782)

On 07/17/2013 at 12:48am - animals - by anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend was sitting on my lap at a birthday party. She thought it would be funny to fart. I came instantly. FML

#20785133
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59582) - you deserved it (21013)

On 07/15/2013 at 9:42pm - intimacy - by needsnewshorts (man) - United States (California)

Today, my husband's recent obsession with The Sopranos since James Gandolfini died went a step further into the ridiculous, when he tried to encourage some ducks to land in our swimming pool by throwing loaves of bread into it, while bellowing at them with a 'Noo Joisey' Wise Guy accent. FML

#20770230
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31687) - you deserved it (3119)

On 07/08/2013 at 7:57am - misc - by Not Mrs Soprano (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I saw a little girl digging in the gravel inside the fireworks tent I work in. After she and her family left, I went and used my foot to smooth out the mound she'd made. In doing so, I discovered that she wasn't digging, she was burying. She'd pooped. FML

#20762850
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46511) - you deserved it (4401)

On 07/04/2013 at 1:18am - kids - by brokeandhungry - United States

Today, it's been weeks since some asshat started placing gnomes in my front and back yards. I resorted to setting up cameras, which I thought had deterred the idiot, until I walked into my kitchen this morning and found two gnomes on the counter. Nothing on the tapes. I'm freaking out here. FML

#20742609
219 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58697) - you deserved it (3823)

On 06/23/2013 at 1:02pm - misc - by ilivealoneandwhatthefuck (man) - Guam

Today, my husband was in our newborn's room, holding and talking to him. I guess he forgot the baby monitor, because I overheard him say, "Wanna know a secret? Daddy kills people." I really hope he was just quoting Dexter. FML

#20732635
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58408) - you deserved it (4178)

On 06/18/2013 at 1:01am - kids - by imarriedanaxemurderer (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my grandma's new dildo arrived in the mail. We buried her yesterday. FML

#20731352
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69078) - you deserved it (3966)

On 06/17/2013 at 12:43pm - intimacy - by hinting (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I went fishing with my dad. I figured, since we were out on the dock, I may as well get rid of my farmer's tan. I fell asleep in the sun and woke up to a fishing net draped over me. I now have a fishnet pattern down the front of my body. FML

#20730236
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39230) - you deserved it (11189)

On 06/16/2013 at 9:39pm - misc - by jhughes1997 (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I uttered the phrase "the pot calling the kettle black" in class. Moments later, I'd been called a "racist twerp" and kicked out of class by the same English teacher who once tried to have another kid suspended for using the word "titillate", because apparently it's "pornographic". FML

#20695090
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47289) - you deserved it (3917)

On 05/30/2013 at 11:20am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Northamptonshire)

Today, I was walking down the stairs with my guitar in hand, singing "I Don't Wanna Miss a Thing" to my wife. I sang, "I don't wanna close my eyes, I don't wanna fall". Before I could say "asleep", I fell down the stairs. My wife almost pissed her pants laughing. My bum hurts. FML

#20691071
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63375) - you deserved it (14432)

On 05/28/2013 at 12:37pm - love - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)



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