pizzaboterham

Search for a member

pizzaboterham

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2351
  • Number of comments : 8
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About pizzaboterham : I've got no idea what to write here, so I'm not going to write anything at all. Oh wait, I just did... PARADOX!!! DAAAAAAAAHHH

pizzaboterham's page activity

Visits<b>_kyleG_</b> - the 03/22/2015 at 3:47pm<b>EverythingNerdy</b> - the 12/25/2013 at 9:36pm

pizzaboterham's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

See all of pizzaboterham's badges

pizzaboterham's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend called me into the bathroom after he had been in there awhile. I found him with his pants down, looking at a pimple on his butt in the mirror. He asked me for "help". FML

by Anonymous / 12/19/2010 at 12:24am / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I found out that my husband's secretary named her new baby boy after my husband. Everyone at the office thinks it's funny. My husband says it's a coincidence. FML

by momoffour / 12/05/2010 at 4:30am / United States (Nebraska) / Love

Today, I was eating dinner with a friend when a really hot guy came up and introduced himself. He told us he was vegetarian, and I wanted to impress him so I told him I was too. I was eating a steak. FML

by Anonymous / 12/05/2010 at 12:13am / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was mad at my mother. Why? We went to parent-teacher interviews, and she told my math teacher that she should allow bathroom breaks because I have a "very heavy menstrual flow." My teacher suggested I eat more red meat. They got into a seven-minute argument about this. FML

by noname / 11/07/2010 at 12:04am / Canada (British Columbia) / Health

Today, I was so lonely that I had a 3 hour conversation with a one-legged cricket I found in my room. I'm keeping him. He has a name. FML

by nk / 11/03/2010 at 12:39am / United States (Kentucky) / Animals

Today, I was told I look like Susan Boyle. FML

by Anonymous / 10/15/2010 at 7:44pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that the blind man I've been helping for months at the grocery store by carrying his shopping around and stuff was actually faking his blindness. FML

by Anonymous / 10/14/2010 at 4:19am / United States (Ohio) / Work

Today, I spent an hour and a half washing my car. As I was driving down the highway, a large bird flew over my car and accidentally dropped the dead animal he was about to have for dinner. It landed on my windshield. FML

by andrea99 / 10/03/2010 at 5:35am / United States / Animals

Today, I married the woman I love. I wasn't the groom, I was the minister. FML

by Pr unlucky / 10/02/2010 at 4:07am / Australia (Western Australia) / Love

Today, I found out my older brother put tanning lotion in the lotion I use to masturbate with. Now I have orange palms and an orange penis which won't go away for weeks. FML

by caughtorangehanded / 10/01/2010 at 6:12pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy

Today, I got a surprise call from LA Fitness saying I've been signed up for a two week pass. It's from my boyfriend. Didn't see this one coming. FML

by Andiii / 07/26/2010 at 1:09pm / United States (California) / Health

Today, while I was driving my 27 year old boyfriend 8 hours to a Pokémon event, he realized he didn't bring his DS with him. He cried about it. FML

by juli / 07/24/2010 at 1:47pm / Taiwan (T'ai-pei) / Love

Today, I was driving back home after hanging out with some friends. I drove pass a woman standing next to a broken down car. I felt bad, so went back and offered her a ride home. Turns out it wasn't her car and she was a hooker. FML

by Anonymous / 03/09/2010 at 2:47am / United States (North Carolina) / Transportation

Today, I was bored at work looking at a sex offender list of my area. After a couple pages, I saw my uncle. FML

by grossuncle / 02/25/2010 at 12:44pm / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy

Today, I was woken up by my own fart. FML

by Wowsers. / 01/30/2010 at 3:47am / United Kingdom (Blackpool) / Miscellaneous