About pizzaboterham : Hello people who are reading this! Of hallo op z'n Hollands! I am pizzaboterham, or pizzabread in English.
Bye
Groetjes
Up and coming moderator
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
Beginner
You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.
Consolation prize
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
Today, my boyfriend took me to meet his friends at one of his exclusive "clubs." Expecting it to be his old friends from college, I agreed to go. Apparently, I've been dating a member of the Ku Klux Klan for 2 years. FML
I agree, your life sucks (53894) - you deserved it (6264)
On 01/16/2010 at 4:24pm - love - by Awkward (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I went to the DMV to renew my license. When I gave the woman behind the desk my name and social security number she looked confused. She then called over her manager, who did the same thing. Getting nervous, I asked what was wrong. Apparently according to the state of Illinois I'm dead. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38261) - you deserved it (1572)
On 01/06/2010 at 9:55am - misc - by driver (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I found out that shutting off the heat in the rental property my parents owned was a bad idea. The water froze and the pipes burst, causing the whole kitchen ceiling to fall down. The water ruined the wood floors and the appliances. I turned off the heat to save money. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8258) - you deserved it (22617)
On 01/04/2010 at 2:20pm - money - by WorkSexMonkey (man) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I pretended to smoke a bread stick that looked like a cigar. It made me feel cool. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8019) - you deserved it (25727)
On 12/07/2009 at 1:06am - misc - by CH (man) - United States (Missouri)
Today, I realized I've lived alone too long. I read 'How the Grinch Stole Christmas' to my cat. I used expression in my voice, and I made sure he could see the pictures. My son called, and I told him about it. He gave me the number for the local psychiatric ward. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18490) - you deserved it (6521)
On 12/05/2009 at 11:30pm - animals - by JC (woman) - United States (Iowa)
Today, my friend found a picture of herself on a website filled with pictures of thin people. I was in the picture, also. I was crossed-out with the word, "EWW" written next to me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23784) - you deserved it (2958)
On 11/30/2009 at 12:09pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I woke up and looked in the mirror and noticed that my face was covered in glitter. I asked my wife about it and she said she put it on me while I was sleeping so that I would sparkle like Edward from Twilight when I'm in the sunlight. FML
I agree, your life sucks (53535) - you deserved it (5831)
On 11/28/2009 at 12:32pm - love - by IB6UB9 - United States
Today, I woke up in a closet of a four star hotel, having spent the night drinking. I am a secondary school teacher and I have been visiting this place on a school trip. My flight left at 4am this morning and it's now 1pm in the afternoon. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4601) - you deserved it (39488)
On 11/23/2009 at 1:29pm - misc - by Nicholasand (woman) - United Kingdom (Staffordshire)
Today, I auditioned for a part and made it because the director thought I would be "perfect" for the part and I was "just like the character in every way." The part is for a schizophrenic drug addict who everyone hates and is stabbed to death in the second scene. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20102) - you deserved it (2870)
On 11/12/2009 at 4:37pm - work - by Falafax (man) - United States
Today, when going to fill up the kettle, I noticed a bad smell and pieces of something coming out of the tap. Turns out there was a dead snake in my water supply. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27462) - you deserved it (1205)
On 10/30/2009 at 1:08am - misc - by seriousdubsteplover (man) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, the Fire Department found my car overturned in a ditch and on fire. It was two miles away from where I parked it about three hours ago. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29939) - you deserved it (1417)
On 10/04/2009 at 1:48am - money - by ThatTrafficCone (woman) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I found out that my whole family thinks my girlfriend is imaginary. I sent her a text in front of them telling her that. She never responded. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36158) - you deserved it (4197)
On 09/21/2009 at 12:16am - love - by Imaginary girlfriend - Sent from mobile version
Today, during gym class, my teacher insisted that everyone should to relieve some stress by throwing a basketball at the wall. I wound up and hurled the thing at the wall, it bounced back and hit me in the stomach. I began to vomit uncontrollably. Even my teacher laughed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31946) - you deserved it (7419)
On 09/17/2009 at 5:17pm - misc - by sara (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, as I was walking through the park I had to yawn. In mid-yawn, with my mouth wide open, I walked right through a spider web getting both the spider and the prey it was eating stuck in my mouth. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36069) - you deserved it (5645)
On 09/08/2009 at 3:02pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Tennessee)
Today, I was walking on a busy street. I saw this beautiful blonde walking across the street and a car was coming. I wanted to be like in the movies where the guy pushes the girl out of the way so she doesn't get hit. I accidentally pushed her the wrong way. Right into the car. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9169) - you deserved it (54522)
On 09/07/2009 at 3:21pm - misc - by ilovefootball (man) - United States (New Jersey)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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