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pizzaboterham

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pizzaboterham

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1300
  • Number of comments : 8
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About pizzaboterham : I've got no idea what to write here, so I'm not going to write anything at all. Oh wait, I just did... PARADOX!!! DAAAAAAAAHHH

pizzaboterham's page activity

Visits<b>EverythingNerdy</b> - the 12/25/2013 at 9:36pm

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pizzaboterham's favorite FMLs

Today, after eighteen years of living with my adoptive parents, I met my biological mum for the first time. She's a forty year old, 300lb American woman who wears 'Twilight' t-shirts and will be spending the rest of her visit to the UK trying to find Robert Pattinson. She says I remind her of herself. FML

#16301651
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47696) - you deserved it (3679)

On 05/22/2011 at 7:09pm - kids - by Adoptee (woman) - United Kingdom (Leicestershire)

Today, after eighteen years of living with my adoptive parents, I met my biological mum for the first time. She's a forty year old, 300lb American woman who wears 'Twilight' t-shirts and will be spending the rest of her visit to the UK trying to find Robert Pattinson. She says I remind her of herself. FML

#16301651
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47696) - you deserved it (3679)

On 05/22/2011 at 7:09pm - kids - by Adoptee (woman) - United Kingdom (Leicestershire)

Today, after eighteen years of living with my adoptive parents, I met my biological mum for the first time. She's a forty year old, 300lb American woman who wears 'Twilight' t-shirts and will be spending the rest of her visit to the UK trying to find Robert Pattinson. She says I remind her of herself. FML

#16301651
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47696) - you deserved it (3679)

On 05/22/2011 at 7:09pm - kids - by Adoptee (woman) - United Kingdom (Leicestershire)

Today, I noticed an extremely large bug buzzing around my room. After several attempts, I stomped on it with my shoe. I was trying to get a closer look at my victory when it flew into my nostril. Turns out it was just playing dead. FML

#16201073
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28068) - you deserved it (7876)

On 05/16/2011 at 2:26am - misc - by bugnose (woman) -

Today, I was at a local talent show and during a piano performance I had to go to the bathroom. I sang along in the bathroom but was unaware how loud I was until I walked out and everyone started applauding me while the pianist was still playing. FML

#15661071
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7690) - you deserved it (24006)

On 04/06/2011 at 2:19am - misc - by American idol -

Today, I fell going down the stairs to the subway platform during rush hour. Someone was kind enough to help me up and someone else was kind enough to steal my iPhone which had fallen out of my pocket and landed nearby. FML

#15581921
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31133) - you deserved it (3333)

On 03/31/2011 at 10:42pm - money - by blegh - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, at the Mommy and Me dance class that I take my four year old daughter to, the instructor had us do a stretch, telling us to pretend we're mermaids. My daughter said to me, "But you're not a mermaid, you're a whale!" FML

#15385688
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37208) - you deserved it (6977)

On 03/19/2011 at 5:04pm - kids - by Abby_gummibear (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, my mom banned me from watching The Simpsons and Family Guy because apparently, they're part of "the Devil's plan to corrupt God's children". FML

#15370334
368 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39755) - you deserved it (8943)

On 03/18/2011 at 5:40pm - misc - by Jonathan (man) - Denmark (Midtjyllen)

Today, I had a violent coughing fit while at the store, which caused a lady to think I was choking, grab me from behind and start doing the Heimlich maneuver incorrectly. She broke two of my ribs. FML

#15334781
288 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39006) - you deserved it (3223)

On 03/16/2011 at 8:53am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I found out my friends call me 'Shamu the whale' behind my back. FML

#15139956
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23724) - you deserved it (5123)

On 02/27/2011 at 2:28pm - misc - by Shamu (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I asked my dad what his plans for Friday were. Apparently, he's going to a concert with my step-mom all evening. It's been their plan for months. Friday is my birthday. That's been set since the day I was born. FML

#15099453
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29493) - you deserved it (6155)

On 02/24/2011 at 5:34am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, I found out that the mysterious smell from under my bed was my cats collection of dead mice. FML

#15066024
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28434) - you deserved it (5854)

On 02/21/2011 at 2:20pm - animals - by Giggity - United States (Missouri)

Today, I had to babysit two kids. I told them to stop fighting, or to sit on separate couches. They stopped. I asked why nobody would sit on the other couch, where I'd been sitting. They told me it was the couch their autistic brother often pees on. FML

#14792187
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25598) - you deserved it (2941)

On 01/31/2011 at 10:11pm - misc - by joxerthemighty39 (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, in dance class, the instructor asked me to demonstrate the splits to the group. I slid down, my legs opening wider as I descended. I then loudly farted for the full 5 seconds it took to reach the ground. FML

#14613104
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28328) - you deserved it (5119) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 11:44am - misc - by SkinsCastSelection - Switzerland - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, I found out that my beautiful engagement ring is a remake of the late Princess Diana's engagement ring. I also found out my fiancé bought it from an infomercial, for $19.95. FML

#14447328
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31118) - you deserved it (6790)

On 01/03/2011 at 1:52am - love - by puggles (woman) - United States (Texas)



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