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pizzaboterham

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pizzaboterham

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1437
  • Number of comments : 8
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About pizzaboterham : I've got no idea what to write here, so I'm not going to write anything at all. Oh wait, I just did... PARADOX!!! DAAAAAAAAHHH

pizzaboterham's page activity

Visits<b>EverythingNerdy</b> - the 12/25/2013 at 9:36pm

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pizzaboterham's favorite FMLs

Today, I brought my Japanese girlfriend home for dinner with my family for the first time. They all got drunk and made heaps of racist jokes right in front of us. My dad forgot her name and started calling her "Rice Ball" instead. FML

#20858245
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55880) - you deserved it (4422)

On 08/28/2013 at 6:35pm - love - by Thanks everyone (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I won a lottery at my local grocery store. Excited, I went to claim my prize, only to discover it was a bottle of red wine. I'm a recovering alcoholic. FML

#20858175
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41160) - you deserved it (3023)

On 08/28/2013 at 5:47pm - misc - by notsolucky - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I caught my sister eating crayons. She's 19. FML

#20858152
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38759) - you deserved it (2734)

On 08/28/2013 at 5:29pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my sister announced that she and her boyfriend are getting married. Her boyfriend is my husband. We're not even legally divorced yet. FML

#20857902
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64835) - you deserved it (3889)

On 08/28/2013 at 1:47pm - love - by still together (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I went down on my boyfriend, and tried out a new trick I learned. I read in a magazine that if you hum while giving oral, it's supposed to feel good. My boyfriend started laughing and told me to stop after 30 seconds because I reminded him of his singing toothbrush. FML

#20857818
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49540) - you deserved it (9257)

On 08/28/2013 at 12:11pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, my first date in years cancelled on me because she has to "wash the horse's hair." The date was arranged for 9:30pm. FML

#20857695
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37806) - you deserved it (3073)

On 08/28/2013 at 9:25am - misc - by AtLeastHaveADecientExcuse -

Today, my neighbor's daughter started learning how to play the trombone. FML

#20857611
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41530) - you deserved it (4902)

On 08/28/2013 at 6:33am - kids - by Alice (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I turned around after loading the washing machine to discover my husband's 89-year-old grandmother dropping her pants. She looked at me and said, "I hope you don't mind but when you got to go, you got to go." She then sat down on the toilet and let out a loud, long fart. FML

#20857413
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35536) - you deserved it (3144)

On 08/28/2013 at 12:48am - misc - by Grandmas lost it - United States (New York)

Today, I walked into my new office for the first time after receiving the promotion I've been trying for. Someone took a dump on my desk. FML

#20857349
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44643) - you deserved it (3273)

On 08/28/2013 at 12:06am - work - by DefinitelyNotDogshit (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I asked my boss for a raise, explaining that another shop offered me a job at a higher rate, but I would stay if he would offer me the same. Instead, he fired me then called the other shop and said I was fired for failing a drug test. FML

#20857270
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53176) - you deserved it (6908)

On 08/27/2013 at 11:21pm - work - by nowork - United States (New York)

Today, I learned that the girl I've been seeing for 6 months is actually married. She just dates me when her husband is pissing her off. FML

#20857254
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46558) - you deserved it (3480)

On 08/27/2013 at 11:11pm - love - by the other man - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I finally accepted my grandma's friend request on Facebook. I commented on a family photo album she'd uploaded, joking that the quality would greatly improve once she added pictures of me. My comment was met with, "Shut up you sewage rat". FML

#20857055
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38134) - you deserved it (7561)

On 08/27/2013 at 9:29pm - misc - by sweetnan (woman) - Chile (Region Metropolitana)

Today, I came into the kitchen to see how dinner was coming along. My mother was milling the meat around the skillet with the cat's poop scooper as a spatula. FML

#20856980
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40389) - you deserved it (2521)

On 08/27/2013 at 8:32pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Nebraska)

Today, it was the day of my wedding. I had a massive headache a couple of hours before the ceremony so I decided to take a nap. I told my brother to wake me up an hour before it started. He forgot. Now everyone thinks I ran out on my wife. FML

#20856967
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45363) - you deserved it (6602)

On 08/27/2013 at 8:23pm - love - by dhskkf (man) - United States

Today, my son told his 8-year-old sister that since she swallowed an apple seed, that a tree is going to grow in her stomach and kill her. She's inconsolable and won't believe that she'll be fine, because "they say that to all the dying people on TV". FML

#20817414
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43511) - you deserved it (3896)

On 08/02/2013 at 5:54pm - kids - by ulisha5 (woman) - Bulgaria (Burgas)



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