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pinkiepiexd99's favorite FMLs

Today, I was dying my hair a subtly different color. It was only supposed to turn my hair a shade or two lighter, but it seems someone at the store thought it would be funny to switch the dye in the boxes around. My hair is purple. FML

Today, I came home in tears over finding out my boyfriend has been cheating on me. I told my seemingly sympathetic dad everything. His advice was to lure them both to our house with the promise of a three-way, after which he'd "kill the shit" out of them. Real mature, dad. FML


I agree, your life sucks (37575) - you deserved it (6693)

On 03/31/2013 at 1:55pm - love - by immaturity all around (woman) - United States

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She didn't say no, she didn't faint, and she didn't cry. She just stared at me blankly and said, "But... why...?" FML


I agree, your life sucks (45924) - you deserved it (3873) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/29/2013 at 9:29pm - love - by Badam - France (Aquitaine)

Today, I felt frisky, so I went over to my boyfriend's place, hoping to have some fun. I brought over a movie, and part-way through it, I started feeling him up. He responded by sighing, "That's really fucking annoying, babe. Cut it out, yeah?" FML


I agree, your life sucks (40547) - you deserved it (8922)

On 03/29/2013 at 5:36pm - love - by sarajj (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I spent the whole night and day painting a portrait of my girlfriend. Being proud of it, I sent it to her hoping she would appreciate it. I spent hours working on that picture only for her to reply with, "That's not me, is it?" FML


I agree, your life sucks (34808) - you deserved it (4297)

On 03/29/2013 at 7:12am - love - by artist (woman) - Czech Republic (Hlavni mesto Praha)

Today, my now ex-girlfriend posted on Facebook that I called her a "fucking bitch". Our mutual friends were all outraged, and demanded that I treat her with respect. What she failed to mention was that I said it after finding out that she's been sleeping with my "best friend" for the past year. FML


I agree, your life sucks (49671) - you deserved it (3494)

On 03/28/2013 at 6:35pm - love - by Hellosinglelife (man) - Trinidad and Tobago (Saint George)

Today, I held hands with the boy I like. Without thinking, I commented that his right hand is softer, as if he only used lotion on that one hand. And then we stood there in terribly awkward silence. FML


I agree, your life sucks (45413) - you deserved it (16814)

On 03/13/2013 at 12:57am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)

Today, I awoke to the sound of my dad knocking on my dorm room door for a surprise visit. He's barely outside the door and I pull the door open and say hey, when my roommate strips naked pulls the door open, kisses me on the cheek, says in an uber-gay voice, "Thanks for last night", and leaves. FML


I agree, your life sucks (264885) - you deserved it (35178)

On 03/22/2009 at 6:38am - intimacy - by konens_dick (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML


I agree, your life sucks (255704) - you deserved it (87424)

On 02/16/2009 at 9:29pm - kids - by offbeans (man) - United States (California)

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