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picturescrazy's favorite FMLs
Today, a person came into McDonald's, where I work. They ordered a happy meal. As they were an adult, I assumed the meal was for their child, who wasn't with them. When I asked if the toy was for a boy or a girl, they said the toy was for them. I still had to ask if it was for a boy or a girl. FML
by paris78 / 10/17/2009 at 8:04pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was playing FarmTown and got into a fight with a 14 year old boy. I threatened him with physical violence, and he reported me. I'm 23 years old and got banned from a virtual farming game for threatening children. FML
by hatelittleboys / 10/15/2009 at 1:04pm / United States (Colorado) / Kids
Today, my dad took a call while driving. He always yells and curses at people who talk on their cell while driving. I asked him to get off the phone because it's dangerous, and told him he's being a hypocrite. He shook his head at me and continued talking. Seconds later, we got into an accident. FML
by Irony / 10/08/2009 at 7:40am / United States (New Jersey) / Transportation
Today, I was locked inside my dorm room. Yeah, inside. How? Some of my floormates decided to stick pennies in the door frame, which jammed the handle. I was stuck inside my room and had to pee really bad. I couldn't call an RA to get me out either. Why? I am the RA. FML
by pennyhater / 10/07/2009 at 4:43pm / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
by Icy / 10/01/2009 at 2:59am / United States (Washington) / Love
Today, I open my front door and saw a covered basket with a card from my girlfriend on it. I picked it up and read, "Hope this cheers you up." I uncovered the basket to find a golden labrador puppy. Its eyes were closed and it wasn't breathing. FML
by rainedaddy / 09/29/2009 at 12:17am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
by screwwyou / 09/27/2009 at 9:16pm / United States (Michigan) / Love
by Anonymous / 09/10/2009 at 2:02am / United States (Washington) / Work
Today, I was walking on a busy street. I saw this beautiful blonde walking across the street and a car was coming. I wanted to be like in the movies where the guy pushes the girl out of the way so she doesn't get hit. I accidentally pushed her the wrong way. Right into the car. FML
by ilovefootball / 09/07/2009 at 3:21pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous
Today, my mum grounded me for going to my boyfriend's house instead of the library. She said my boyfriend's mum phoned up because she could hear us having it off in his room. When I denied it my mum shouted at me for being a liar as well as a slut. I did go to the library. FML
by SingleGirl / 09/07/2009 at 11:39am / United Kingdom (York) / Love
Today, I went out with my family and boyfriend for dinner. We were all having a good time, and suddenly at the end of dinner he decides to kneel down on one knee, take out an engagement ring, and say "I choose you, Pikachu," with a straight face. He was serious. FML
by mandy / 09/04/2009 at 10:19pm / United States (California) / Love
Today, I was walking with my boyfriend down the street and a really hot guy walked past with no shirt on. While distracted by his hardened stomach muscles, I promptly walked into a pole, then became single. FML
by Anonymous / 09/02/2009 at 5:21am / Australia / Miscellaneous
by Misterhippo / 09/01/2009 at 8:04pm / United States (California) / Health
by shaggy / 08/30/2009 at 5:26pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love
Today, my friend and I were making sandwiches at his house. His family's dog wandered over just as I dropped a large chunk of cheddar on the floor. The dog snatched it up and ran away with it. I yelled after it, jokingly, that I hoped it would choke and die. It did. FML
by lily / 08/30/2009 at 4:17pm / United States (California) / Animals
- 1Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 2Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say… 3Today, I was eating my lunch. When I opened my mouth to eat a spoonful of rice, a bee flew right…