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This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Today, I went to the emergency room for busting my lip open, I had to lie and tell them I slipped and fell. In reality I was singing with the soap bottle and slammed it into my lip. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14368) - you deserved it (8469)
On 10/12/2011 at 4:05pm - misc - by Nickname (woman) - United States (Arizona)
Today, I met an old friend, with whom I have a complicated history and we hooked up. He came before we even started. In his sleep, he pushed me out of the bed. When I woke up, he had peed himself in his sleep. Glad I let that ship sail. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13811) - you deserved it (17675)
On 10/11/2011 at 10:51am - intimacy - by CC (woman) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)
Today, my mom instructed me to never scream when being attacked by a rapist. Apparently it would only anger him, causing him to chop my boobs off and superglue my eyes shut. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28874) - you deserved it (2345)
On 09/28/2011 at 2:47am - intimacy - by Sabraynay -
Today, my boyfriend cheated on me. But he justified it by saying she was a ginger. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25052) - you deserved it (3000)
On 09/13/2011 at 8:07pm - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Tennessee)
Today, while flicking my bean, I was thinking about my boyfriend who moved to California last week. Before I came, I had to stop because I started crying. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22176) - you deserved it (6813)
On 08/14/2011 at 8:25pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, my boyfriend tried to tell me that he was worried our child might not be mine because he was cheating on me when I got pregnant. FML
I agree, your life sucks (54315) - you deserved it (4979)
On 06/29/2011 at 7:52pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Indiana)
Today, my boyfriend tried to tell me that he was worried our child might not be mine because he was cheating on me when I got pregnant. FML
I agree, your life sucks (54315) - you deserved it (4979)
On 06/29/2011 at 7:52pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Indiana)
Today, my boyfriend said that to be extra careful he's been taking my birth control pills too. FML
I agree, your life sucks (51996) - you deserved it (5654)
On 06/27/2011 at 9:55am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, my boyfriend came before I'd even unbuttoned my pants. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47503) - you deserved it (5422)
On 06/27/2011 at 4:56am - intimacy - by Username - United States
Today, my 400 pound roommate brought home a 400 pound guy. Now there's 800 pounds of sex going on in the next room, and it sounds like the invasion of Normandy in there. FML
I agree, your life sucks (59843) - you deserved it (5172)
On 02/04/2011 at 12:42am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)
Today, my brother's girlfriend and my girlfriend went out shopping. My brother's girlfriend bought a pair of killer black heels and a box of condoms. My girlfriend bought a pair of orange Crocs and a vibrator. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34162) - you deserved it (1791)
On 08/09/2010 at 9:24am - intimacy - by Mikey832 (man) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)
Today, I walked into my bedroom, only to find out that my bed is missing. I have no idea where it is. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34103) - you deserved it (426)
On 08/04/2010 at 1:18am - misc - by Username - Sent from mobile version
Today, while I was driving my 27 year old boyfriend 8 hours to a Pokémon event, he realized he didn't bring his DS with him. He cried about it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33345) - you deserved it (14883)
On 07/24/2010 at 1:47pm - love - by juli (woman) - Taiwan (T'ai-pei)
Today, my girlfriend of 2 years broke up with me because she said I was more of a woman than she was. I yelled out, "I HATE YOU!" and started to cry. She then took a tampon out of her purse, handed it to me, laughed, and walked away. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13548) - you deserved it (52555)
On 07/24/2010 at 6:53am - misc - by GirlishMan1883897 (man) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, I lost my phone. I tried to call it using my husband's phone, but couldn't figure out which of the three Kates in the contact list was me. Turns out, two are co-workers and one is his aunt. I was listed under Satan. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33038) - you deserved it (6591)
On 03/15/2010 at 7:22pm - love - by Satan (woman) - United States (Washington)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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