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petite_poptart

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petite_poptart

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  • Number of visits : 2123
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

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petite_poptart's page activity

Visits<b>sphen</b> - the 06/25/2009 at 10:05pm<b>tgd4444</b> - the 06/14/2009 at 2:45pm

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petite_poptart's favorite FMLs

Today, a girl-scout asked me to buy cookies, in front of Giant. She looked nice, so I bought 5 boxes from her. She took the money and went home with her mom. I opened the boxes when I got home and realized that the boxes just had rocks in them. I got scammed by a girl-scout. FML

#357552
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (213900) - you deserved it (35220)

On 03/15/2009 at 9:14pm - money - by twit (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I sat next to an attractive punk/rock guy on a plane. I decided to try to impress by playing music I thought he would like. I clicked The Who and opened a large window with the album cover, so he could see. The track then shuffled, and he was face to with a giant image of Miley Cyrus. FML

#333328
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14900) - you deserved it (108383)

On 03/15/2009 at 12:22am - love - by UH-OH (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my family and I were at a restaurant. We're Swedish and love talking about people in our language because no one ever understands here. I decided to comment about how ugly the girl at the next table was. She turned around and goes "Dra åt helvete." That's Swedish for "Go to hell." FML

#329882
443 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26867) - you deserved it (291322)

On 03/14/2009 at 9:30pm - misc - by SwedishBozo (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I checked my Facebook to find I had been tagged in a bunch of photos from a party I had attended last night. On each picture I had a comment from my mom saying, "You're grounded." FML

#322289
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30438) - you deserved it (76092)

On 03/14/2009 at 2:22pm - misc - by Noname - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was going to attempt to compliment my girlfriend, I planned on telling her that she smelled really nice. In a loving tone, I confidently told her, "Baby, you have a certain stench to you." FML

#318197
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17664) - you deserved it (109764)

On 03/14/2009 at 7:05am - love - by DSM (man) - United States (North Dakota)

Today, I was going to attempt to compliment my girlfriend, I planned on telling her that she smelled really nice. In a loving tone, I confidently told her, "Baby, you have a certain stench to you." FML

#318197
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17664) - you deserved it (109764)

On 03/14/2009 at 7:05am - love - by DSM (man) - United States (North Dakota)

Today, after taping 5-year-olds do a skit at an improv camp, I used the camera's view-finder to zoom in on a female co-worker's chest. Another female co-worker tapped me on the shoulder to show that the TV was still connected to the camera. Parents, kids, and instructors all witnessed it. FML

#310419
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13984) - you deserved it (126035)

On 03/13/2009 at 9:06pm - misc - by Noname - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I decided to tell my mom about my choice to wait to have sex until after marriage. Coming from a very christian family I thought she would be proud. Instead she laughed and said, "is that your excuse for not being able to get laid?" and walked out of the room. FML

#283028
282 comments

I agree, your life sucks (266525) - you deserved it (48402)

On 03/12/2009 at 1:53pm - intimacy - by sucks - United States

Today, my girlfriend was giving me head while I was watching Star Trek and I accidentally called her Spock. FML

#279733
519 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54282) - you deserved it (314587)

On 03/12/2009 at 5:30am - intimacy - by Noname (man) - New Zealand (Canterbury)

Today, I was eating lunch naked at my home watching porn on the big screen. I heard the garage door opening meaning my roommate was coming home. In my haste to get dressed, I fell back in the barstool I was sitting in and knocked myself out. I woke up still naked and with lettuce all over me. FML

#278861
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22684) - you deserved it (73342)

On 03/11/2009 at 8:26pm - intimacy - by HansonLUVR (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I had to get my hair chopped off for a role that I'm playing in a show. I was staring at the floor while the woman cut my hair, and I suddenly heard her start crying. Her tears were immediately followed by "It's okay! I have a friend in New York who can fix it. We won't charge you." FML

#267715
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (74038) - you deserved it (3254)

On 03/11/2009 at 1:21am - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was writing an email to our entire company regarding a fundraiser we are taking part in for children and adults with disabilities. I was rushing to get the email out and hit send before I realized that instead of "Best Regards" I had typed "Best Retards" as the closing line. FML

#226271
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26733) - you deserved it (36993)

On 03/06/2009 at 1:53pm - work - by Can't Spell Worth A Damn (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was in spanish class, having a debate about the death penalty. When I went to make a point, I meant to say "La pena de muerte", which means "The death penalty". I said, "La pene de muerte". Turns out that means, "The penis of death". FML

#206263
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26708) - you deserved it (41629)

On 03/04/2009 at 12:42pm - misc - by Señor Guapo (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I drove my two kids to their friends' houses. In my convertible, looking what I though was my best, I slowed down outside a bar with cute 20 year old girls in front. My daughter noticed the speed reduction and said, "Keep driving dad, you're fat and mom left you for a reason." FML

#196936
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51151) - you deserved it (40183)

On 03/03/2009 at 4:27pm - kids - by Fat Dad (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I woke up at my boyfriend's place with grumbling stomach pains. I left him in bed to go have explosive diarreah in the bathroom next to his room. When I was done, I came back to bed and snuggled in next to his sleeping form and he rolled over to whisper, "I heard everthing." FML

#185544
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72867) - you deserved it (15793)

On 03/02/2009 at 4:51pm - love - by ohmygoodness (woman) - United States (Ohio)



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