About perfectflower : Got any questions just ask I'm complicated I was and still am a belly dancer but I'm Hawaiian and I'm making my way through the medical field
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Today, I found out my boyfriend and I have more in common than I thought. We both are sexually attracted to men. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32812) - you deserved it (2285)
On 04/18/2012 at 12:55pm - intimacy - by caitlinz5 (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I found out that my partner thinks love is more meaningful than sex, so it's okay to stick his penis in someone else. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27193) - you deserved it (2466)
On 04/12/2012 at 4:42pm - intimacy - by Munkeh (woman) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)
Today, I was eating a banana, and decided to practice my blowjob skills, since my boyfriend is always complaining that I'm bad at giving head. Let's just say my lungs now have their daily dose of potassium. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6752) - you deserved it (21856)
On 04/11/2012 at 3:53pm - intimacy - by potassiumgirl - United States (Florida)
Today, I was at the movies with my boyfriend, when I had to go pee. Halfway down the aisle, I tripped, screamed, and fell face-first into some guy. My boyfriend is now accusing me of cheating and "flirting" with every man I see. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18730) - you deserved it (2509)
On 04/09/2012 at 2:18pm - love - by missclitter - United States
Today, I realized I'm too short to use the urinals at work. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21171) - you deserved it (1801)
On 04/06/2012 at 7:32am - work - by littleman (man) - United States
Today, my girlfriend and I were in bed. She slipped her hand under the duvet, and I got all excited thinking she was going to give me a hand job. She was actually pulling out her wedgie. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15705) - you deserved it (7956)
On 04/06/2012 at 7:10am - intimacy - by TJ - United Kingdom (Surrey)
Today, I was taking a really big test in a class that I was failing. It was worth at least 7 grades so I studied my butt off. During the test, a girl with huge breasts sat down next to me and I couldn't stop staring. My test got confiscated because they thought I was cheating. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7283) - you deserved it (35152)
On 04/05/2012 at 11:02pm - work - by tatatest (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend, when his sister knocked on the door and asked if she could borrow the zombie movie we were watching after we were done with it. We weren't watching a movie; I was just moaning. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9618) - you deserved it (19840)
On 04/04/2012 at 1:45pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I was so baked out of my mind that I argued with my parakeet over who farted. I could be wrong, but I think I lost the argument. Worse still, my boyfriend had been standing in the doorway long enough to hear everything, even me farting. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5760) - you deserved it (24898)
On 04/04/2012 at 12:14pm - misc - by woohoo420 (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my four-year-old son decided to bite my butt during prayer at church. The entire sanctuary heard me instinctively swear at him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10902) - you deserved it (18813)
On 04/03/2012 at 2:19pm - kids - by potatoebee - United States (South Carolina)
Today, I decided to spray tan myself. Five minutes later, I had to pee, so I did. Not only do I now have two orange stripes on my toilet bowl, but I also have two big white stripes on the back of my thighs. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4221) - you deserved it (22297)
On 04/03/2012 at 1:13am - misc - by Wannabees (woman) - Canada
Today, my boyfriend told me that he'd never made a girl orgasm. I didn't think much of it until he decided to go down on me. Every time he got me close to orgasm, he'd stop and ask, "Are you about to come?" or "Does that feel good?" Now I can see why he's never made a girl orgasm. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22678) - you deserved it (2206)
On 04/02/2012 at 10:07pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I learned why the phrase "seafood taco salad" terrifies everyone in the school's cafeteria. What happened to me after eating it made Saw III look like a Disney movie. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14526) - you deserved it (2304)
On 03/26/2012 at 6:21pm - health - by Mandy - United States
Today, I found out that sex in the woods is amazing. I also found that the roar of a nearby bear will end the amazement. Not only was I cock blocked by a bear, I almost shit myself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19659) - you deserved it (4385)
On 03/21/2012 at 11:21pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Kentucky)
Today, even though she can barely deal with raising kids, my 19-year-old sister announced her fourth pregnancy, by a fourth man, of yet another race. Why? Because she wants to "be like Angelina Jolie." I fear that social services may laugh at me if I tell them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29330) - you deserved it (1895)
On 02/12/2012 at 7:18pm - kids - by amythest - United Kingdom (Belfast)
Friday 24 May 2013
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