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percy_22's favorite FMLs
by doughgirl101 / 09/07/2011 at 1:59am / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous
Today, after a conference with my teacher who had previously accused me of not doing my homework, she finally discovered she'd been losing it all this time. I've been getting straight Fs for a month. FML
by purpleivy / 09/06/2011 at 2:53pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, my mum gave me half-raw chicken for dinner. After she refused to cook it again, I threw it away saying that I didn't want to get salmonella. She told to be more grateful, and that I was an idiot for trying to use salmonella as an excuse because 'it's chicken, not salmon'. FML
by SoupCanoe / 08/29/2011 at 4:33am / United Kingdom (Hampshire) / Health
Today, I started my shift as a cop, patrolling the streets on a bicycle. Everywhere I went, gangs of youths yelled stuff out at me, like "Bike twat", "Pig on wheels", "That's a girl's bike you muppet" and "Go on wanker, do a wheelie." FML
by Andrew / 08/28/2011 at 6:37pm / Ireland (Dublin) / Work
by skichick54 / 08/24/2011 at 1:28am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was talking to my girlfriend on the phone. The subject of abuse came up and I told her that if her father ever hurt her I would cut his dick off. The next thing I hear is, "Don't say shit you can't back up!" Her father had picked up the phone the moment I'd said it. FML
by Fucked / 01/24/2011 at 5:47pm / United States (Georgia) / Intimacy
Today, I was writing an email to our entire company regarding a fundraiser we are taking part in for children and adults with disabilities. I was rushing to get the email out and hit send before I realized that instead of "Best Regards" I had typed "Best Retards" as the closing line. FML
by Can't Spell Worth A Damn / 03/06/2009 at 1:53pm / United States (Illinois) / Work
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- 1Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 2Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say… 3Today, I was eating my lunch. When I opened my mouth to eat a spoonful of rice, a bee flew right…
- Today, I went over to my crush's house for the first time. Everything was going great until his dog… Today, I was trying to avoid one of our dogs while driving down the drive. Instead I crashed into a… Today, I was at drama club, rehearsing for a play I'm in. But I had to leave early and so I went up…