About penguin182 : Well, I can't think of anything clever to write here, but follow me on Instagram; "lukaskagstroem"!
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You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
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Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
penguin182's favorite FMLs
Today, a man asked me on a date. It's been so long, I accepted immediately. He began quoting what seemed like random numbers to me, and it took me a few minutes to work out what he meant. Not only was I mistaken for a prostitute, I'm also worth, at most, $60. FML
by that kind of girl / 04/01/2014 at 8:02pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love
by derped-out sperm / 04/01/2014 at 5:41pm / Ireland / Kids
by off to the whorehouse, then / 03/31/2014 at 5:03pm / United Kingdom (Brighton and Hove) / Intimacy
by testacular / 03/25/2014 at 5:20pm / United Kingdom (Plymouth) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 03/23/2014 at 12:05am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 03/19/2014 at 10:43pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
Today, my boss told me that there is no point in making me cut onions anymore because every time I do, I look like I've "been beaten", and can't be seen by the customers for at least half an hour. FML
by Embarassed / 03/19/2014 at 6:24pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Work
by Anonymous / 03/15/2014 at 5:02pm / Australia (Queensland) / Money
by KennyJF7 / 03/14/2014 at 10:43pm / United States (Texas) / Animals
by Anonymous / 03/13/2014 at 5:34am / Australia / Intimacy
Today, I started my first job as a power line technician. My boss's first words to me were, "I have a good feeling about you, kid!" That would've been great if he hadn't said, "Although, the last time I had a good feeling, the guy died." right afterwards. FML
by Anon / 03/12/2014 at 8:11pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Work
by Anonymous / 03/12/2014 at 11:33am / United States / Transportation
by Anonymous / 03/12/2014 at 2:39am / United States (Hawaii) / Kids
by ashamed father / 03/09/2014 at 6:32pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids
by fuck off, eh! / 03/07/2014 at 4:25pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, my parents let me babysit my baby sister for the first time. About an hour after they left,… 2Today, I saw an elderly lady fall over in the street. Nobody bothered to do anything, so I went… 3Today, I was fired for being late to work, even though the only reason I was late was because I had…