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pencilsupmynose

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pencilsupmynose

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  • Number of visits : 2345
  • Number of comments : 48
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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pencilsupmynose's favorite FMLs

Today, my husband has been out of town for a week. The only text I've got from him was, "I didn't take a poop today." FML

#12748634
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27672) - you deserved it (3374)

On 08/26/2010 at 12:08am - love - by TextsAlot (woman) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, while grabbing a husk of corn out of the boiling hot pot, I splashed hot water on my neck, dropped the corn on my injured toe, and cut myself on the counters, all while my family laughed at my pain. FML

#12731475
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25636) - you deserved it (8843)

On 08/25/2010 at 12:14am - misc - by klutz (woman) - Canada (New Brunswick)

Today, I was driving home with my dad after buying a new truck. We were on the freeway and the engine wasn't revving up very much. My dad thought that something was wrong with my transmission, so he reached over to change gears. Most cars won't go into reverse at high speeds. Mine does. FML

#12706799
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25474) - you deserved it (2632)

On 08/23/2010 at 7:28pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I went on a double date with my bestfriend. At the end of the night, her boyfriend gave her a long kiss, and texted her 5 minutes after we left to say he missed her already. My boyfriend picked his nose, then gave me a fist bump as a goodbye. FML

#12698820
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33586) - you deserved it (6207)

On 08/23/2010 at 7:40am - love - by Sara1990 (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I went shopping with my Mom. I ran into my crush. A school dance is soon and he WAS just about to ask something but my mom glanced over and yelled "TAMPONS OR PADS, SWEETIE?!" He then changed his question to "Haha, so which?" And before I could say a word, my mother answered for me. FML

#12695884
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37264) - you deserved it (3198)

On 08/23/2010 at 2:21am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I mentioned to my dad (we have a close relationship) that my last condom had expired. Happy to buy me new ones for the sake of safe sex, he asked me "Do you need small, or extra small?" FML

#12694516
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31370) - you deserved it (20874)

On 08/23/2010 at 1:05am - intimacy - by diesel444 (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my dad decided to take me to play golf to relieve the stress of recovering from a bad concussion. While teaching me to swing, he hit me in the head. FML

#12655415
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27834) - you deserved it (2820)

On 08/21/2010 at 12:05am - health - by meowcat101 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I spent five minutes waiting by a stop sign. The two cars in front of me were taking a long time to move, so I began beeping and getting angry. Turns out, these cars were parked and I was holding up a line of traffic. FML

#12655399
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6664) - you deserved it (34035)

On 08/21/2010 at 12:04am - misc - by becca (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was on the toilet, when my Mom thought it would be a fun idea to barge in, take a picture of me, post it on Facebook, and tag me. FML

#12650265
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34161) - you deserved it (3908)

On 08/20/2010 at 7:22pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, all the while my friends were over, my mom took too many of her pills and walked around the house nude. She then bit me. FML

#12624086
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37334) - you deserved it (3199)

On 08/19/2010 at 11:48am - misc - by feartheend511 - United States (Maryland)

Today, I had to tell my doctor the real reason why I can't sleep at night for him to prescribe me anymore Ambien: I still have the irrational fear that there are monsters in the closet. I'm 22. FML

#12616432
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20259) - you deserved it (13355)

On 08/19/2010 at 12:10am - health - by Sleeeeeep - Sent from mobile version

Today, one of my cousins offered to sell me his mac for a low price. When I got it, I realized it was an old toshiba painted white with an apple sticker on it. My cousin still insists it's a mac. FML

#12612052
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16415) - you deserved it (27785)

On 08/18/2010 at 8:53pm - misc - by roflcopter (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was alone in the car with my grandma for five hours while she told me all about the multiple bladder infections she's had in the past year. FML

#12599218
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25799) - you deserved it (2861)

On 08/18/2010 at 2:58am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I discovered that my name literally means "burden". This wouldn't be so bad if both my mother and father knew this when they named me. FML

#12596251
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25483) - you deserved it (2630)

On 08/18/2010 at 12:30am - misc - by Anon (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was on my third date with this really cute girl. After a very romantic evening, I decided to go for the first kiss, but because of my nervous reflex in which I get bloody noses, I ended up bleeding all over her face. FML

#12577034
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36918) - you deserved it (4416)

On 08/17/2010 at 3:10am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Utah)



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