peachykeenLNG

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Offline (the 05/17/2016 at 8:29pm)

peachykeenLNG

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 19 January 1988 (28 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1929
  • Number of comments : 30
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

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peachykeenLNG's page activity

Visits<b>SilentDawg</b> - the 07/25/2016 at 7:26pm<b>Roxas_hearts</b> - the 07/12/2016 at 12:23am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 06/09/2016 at 12:23pm<b>jurgen15948501</b> - the 03/23/2016 at 11:04pm<b>obewonstrangeone</b> - the 03/02/2016 at 8:17am<b>pinkblonde5</b> - the 10/05/2015 at 2:45pm<b>zarzon</b> - the 09/02/2015 at 11:58pm<b>Blackout517</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 8:22am<b>dblogic</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 3:23am<b>raineie09</b> - the 05/02/2015 at 4:10pm<b>aaronriver</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 9:03pm<b>catchmypanties</b> - the 04/05/2015 at 4:59pm<b>raven83</b> - the 03/13/2015 at 6:53am<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 03/11/2015 at 9:53pm<b>olpally</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 7:10pm<b>thatoneninjadude</b> - the 09/18/2014 at 10:53am<b>Landesanity</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 10:09pm<b>kimberlyyu</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 11:48am

Fucked!<b>obewonstrangeone</b> - the 03/02/2016 at 2:17pm<b>Blackout517</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 2:22pm

peachykeenLNG's FML badges

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peachykeenLNG's favorite FMLs

Today, I was cuddling in bed with my boyfriend when he started squeezing me as if I were a ketchup bottle. He said he wanted my period to end quicker, and he honestly thought that would work. FML

by Keladrylady / 04/17/2015 at 8:47pm / New Zealand (Auckland) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I hit my head on the steering wheel when I sneezed. I managed to honk the horn and the guy next to me couldn't stop laughing. FML

by headache / 02/22/2015 at 8:41pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I tried to overcome my shyness by warmly greeting the bus driver while entering it. I instead blurted out really loudly the words of the song my iPod was playing. FML

by OzzyWannabee / 02/20/2015 at 3:12am / Miscellaneous

Today, I got drunk at a party. I didn't want my parents to know, so I took out my phone, called my parents, and asked them not to tell them I'm drunk. FML

by SDCore / 02/11/2015 at 7:40pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, we got a new Roomba. I set it to clean and came back an hour later to find shit smears all over the floor. Apparently, one of my cats had done his business in the kitchen, and the Roomba had dragged it around the entire first floor of my house. FML

by Anonymous / 01/13/2015 at 8:50pm / United States (Delaware) / Animals

Today, I found my intoxicated step-father in our back yard trying to domesticate a stray opossum, attempting to give it steak and malt liquor. FML

by Anonymous / 01/09/2015 at 10:41pm / United States (Texas) / Animals

Today, I got an Economics test back from my professor. I got a 17/20. I looked it over and noticed one of the questions was completely right. I checked the textbook he made and the answer was the same. I asked him why it was wrong, and he responded with, "I guess I changed my mind." FML

by badprofessor / 09/18/2014 at 9:44pm / United States (New York) / Work

Today, a guy asked me out, and I felt butterflies in my stomach. I soon realized that it wasn't butterflies, but an unexpected bowel movement. I stood there awkwardly, looking him in the eyes, then farted hard. FML

by HappilyNeverAfter / 09/17/2014 at 11:14pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I won a gruelling fitness competition, only to find out the mystery prize was a voucher to get 10 free spray tans. I'm black. FML

by disappointedjamaican / 08/31/2014 at 2:44pm / United Kingdom (Coventry) / Miscellaneous

Today, some random bloke introduced himself at a bar by asking to fuck me. I got tongue-tied trying to say both "fuck off" and "please go away". I ended up telling him to "Please fuck away." FML

by royallymessedup / 08/21/2014 at 12:36pm / Love

Today, while wandering around the big city I just relocated to, I asked a seemingly pleasant-looking lady where the nearest library was. She told me to get lost, and started laughing. Then said she was just joking and gave me directions. I'm now standing in front of a gay strip joint. FML

by lostintdot / 07/31/2014 at 7:38am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, a new session started for my swimming squad. I walked down to the pool, tripped over a stray equipment bag, and belly-flopped into the pool in front of everyone, fully clothed. I'm the coach. FML

by Anonymous / 07/31/2014 at 1:00am / Australia (New South Wales) / Work

Today, my husband thought it would be romantic to pick me up and fall on the bed with me while we were kissing. Our faces smashed together as we hit the bed, and my tongue is still bleeding on and off. FML

by WasntWorthIt / 07/30/2014 at 1:04pm / United States (New Hampshire) / Intimacy

Today, there are people working in my bathroom. I have the shits. The only place I could think to go was in my cats litter box. I've used it twice and am now contemplating using it a third time. FML

by shewhopoopsinlitterboxes / 07/25/2014 at 11:54am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Animals

Today, while out grocery shopping with my mother, she asked me to hold a large bag of rice for her. Ten minutes later, I realized I'd been absent-mindedly stroking it the whole time, just like when I pick up my cat. FML