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patchyu

Offline (the 07/27/2015 at 5:51pm) | Search for a member

patchyu

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2186
  • Number of comments : 13
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

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patchyu's favorite FMLs

Today, I came home to find my dad drinking. Trying to be cheerful, I greeted him with a "Hi, dad!" He sighed, shook his head, and said "It hurts me when you call me that." FML

#21410667
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30609) - you deserved it (2004)

On 05/15/2015 at 7:55pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my drunk boyfriend decided to wake me up by fingering me. Let's just say going to the ER to get your tampon dug out isn't fun. FML

#21410572
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33353) - you deserved it (2594)

On 05/15/2015 at 3:54pm - intimacy - by nazirah4shizzle (woman) - United States

Today, I went to work at my job as a CNA at a long-term care facility. I'm also on a medication that has a side effect of confusion. I had 3 residents with Alzheimer's tell me to 'get my shit together.' FML

Today, I had sex with a guy I've liked for ages. We were lying in his bed afterwards, and he mumbled the word "happy". I thought it was really sweet, until he repeated himself. "My girlfriend probably won't be too happy about this." FML

#21407745
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31755) - you deserved it (5550)

On 05/10/2015 at 11:35am - intimacy - by YouDontSay (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I called one of my old coworkers to see how she was doing. My boyfriend answered the phone. FML

#21406043
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33063) - you deserved it (2118)

On 05/07/2015 at 2:27am - love - by that one anon - United States (California)

Today, while riding the subway a homeless man got on asking for money. I went to give him a dollar but he refused because I was "of the Asian persuasion." FML

#21404625
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26701) - you deserved it (2074)

On 05/04/2015 at 5:02pm - misc - by Malíya - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I noticed my shower drain wasn't draining well. I cleaned it out, thinking it was just a rat's nest of hair. Wrong. It was an actual dead rat. FML

#21403907
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29520) - you deserved it (2255)

On 05/03/2015 at 12:55pm - misc - by umyuck - United States (Virginia)

Today, I desperately needed to let off some steam at work, so I went outside and screamed obscenities at the top of my lungs, before heading back inside. The police then showed up to investigate complaints of a "raving lunatic" in the area. FML

#21403035
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19136) - you deserved it (21919)

On 05/01/2015 at 6:17pm - work - by RavingLunatic (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was supposed to light candles at my aunt's wedding. I accidentally lit the groom on fire. FML

#21402824
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29909) - you deserved it (5558)

On 05/01/2015 at 9:41am - misc - by why? - United States

Today, my three-year-old nephew chose to jump out of a window and break his arm rather than be babysat by me. FML

#21401920
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26061) - you deserved it (3745)

On 04/29/2015 at 6:44pm - kids - by Winxy (woman) - United States (California)

Today, after assuming I'd been scammed, I finally found the vibrator I ordered over 2 months ago. It was in my mom's bedside cabinet. FML

#21401155
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33307) - you deserved it (3605)

On 04/28/2015 at 12:58pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Devon)

Today, I asked the man of my dreams out on a date. His response: "I'd rather eat my own balls." FML

#21399850
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32555) - you deserved it (3095)

On 04/26/2015 at 4:19am - love - by fuck you (woman) - United Kingdom (Sheffield)

Today, my boyfriend told me he traded nude pictures I sent him for a costume piece in an internet game. He told me I should be okay with this, because, "It's a rare piece." FML

#21398399
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32763) - you deserved it (6254)

On 04/23/2015 at 9:16am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my best friend can now say "I fucked your mom" to me and actually mean it. FML

#21397883
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42161) - you deserved it (2842)

On 04/22/2015 at 10:14am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I poured my heart out to my girlfriend with a serenade. After I finished, she told me she'd come over to tell me she'd found someone else and wanted to break up. FML

#21395896
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30113) - you deserved it (2866)

On 04/18/2015 at 9:03pm - love - by socialix - United States (New Mexico)



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