About paramorevfan : I'm spiffy.
This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Judgmental
You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.
Today, I thought the public restroom I was in was empty, so I started rapping. I realized the room was not empty when, recognizing the song, the person one stall over joined in. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20557) - you deserved it (30247)
On 05/21/2013 at 11:01am - misc - by crappingrapping - United States
Today, I was on a date with this guy I just met and we went to a fancy restaurant. Halfway through the meal, there was an awkward silence, and he decided to end it by saying "You know, you chew like a cow." FML
I agree, your life sucks (33869) - you deserved it (9465)
On 05/17/2013 at 10:59pm - love - by moo... -
Today, while on an escalator, instead of just telling me my underwear label was hanging out of my jeans, a woman behind me decided to tuck the label in herself. You should never have to feel a stranger's finger on your butt crack. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44110) - you deserved it (4223)
On 05/16/2013 at 6:24am - misc - by violatedbuttcrack - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, in the doctor's waiting room, a little boy asked me for a cookie. I told him that I didn't have any. He replied, "But my mom says that ladies with big butts always have cookies in their handbags." FML
I agree, your life sucks (38231) - you deserved it (4878) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 05/15/2013 at 2:58am - misc - by grossesfesses (woman) - France (Picardie)
Today, I was in the doctor's office waiting for my husband to arrive, when a little old lady sat beside me. She seemed nice, until she started farting and blaming it on me. They weren't silent; they sounded like trucker farts and smelled like death. I was there for over an hour. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41680) - you deserved it (3620)
On 05/07/2013 at 3:07pm - misc - by babs (woman) - United States
Today, I was in a bathroom stall and I accidentally dropped my new tampon on the ground. Just as I was about to reach for it, I heard a voice on the other side of the stall say, "Oh great, I needed that" and then a hand reached under my stall and grabbed it. It was my last one. FML
I agree, your life sucks (52526) - you deserved it (3876)
On 05/07/2013 at 1:10am - misc - by the girl next door (woman) - United States (Missouri)
Today, my dumbass colleague was too lazy to go buy balloons for a party in recognition of our company's huge merger. Instead, he made condom balloons. Let's just say you don't make blow up condoms for a prestigious company event. A company whose CEO is named Dick. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45493) - you deserved it (3691)
On 05/05/2013 at 12:14am - work - by ADickySituation - United States (Illinois)
Today, my school took part in a standardized state test. After finishing, I decided to take a nap, only to be awoken by the test monitor, who wanted me to leave. Apparently, I was ferociously farting in my sleep and was disturbing the people still taking the test. FML
I agree, your life sucks (51788) - you deserved it (10774)
On 04/24/2013 at 3:14pm - misc - by Skyler - United States
Today, my halitosis was so bad that when I blew onto my solution in chemistry class, it reacted. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22985) - you deserved it (7005) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 04/09/2013 at 6:29am - health - by Anonymous - Sent from mobile version
Today, while shaving my nether regions, I slipped and sliced myself in three separate places. They won't completely stop bleeding. I'm virtually having a second period, and it hurts to close my legs. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26977) - you deserved it (4966)
On 03/22/2013 at 3:15pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Italy (Calabria)
Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She said yes, and I excitedly called my mother to tell her about our engagement. She half-heartedly said, "Aww, that's nice", before changing the topic to what she'd found in her turd earlier. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26149) - you deserved it (1515)
On 03/07/2013 at 12:10pm - love - by it's shitty, yeah, stfu (man) - Sweden (Vastra Gotaland)
Today, I waited over 30 minutes in freezing cold weather for my bus. When it finally arrived, I went to get on board, but slipped and fell on the icy ground. The driver waited a whole 2 seconds before snorting, "Ain't nobody got time for this shit", closing the doors, and driving off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33118) - you deserved it (2021)
On 01/24/2013 at 4:25pm - misc - by frozensolid (woman) - Canada (Manitoba)
Today, my school's theatre decided to produce Les Misérables. I got the part of Éponine. My boyfriend, being a talented performer, could have gotten any part he wanted. However, he only wanted to play the soldier responsible for killing Éponine. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24675) - you deserved it (3875)
On 01/23/2013 at 1:03pm - love - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I dragged my boyfriend to see Les Misérables with me. He now refuses to communicate with me through any medium other than singing. Apparently, this is his revenge. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11648) - you deserved it (33685)
On 01/21/2013 at 4:39pm - love - by lesson.learned (woman) - United Kingdom (West Sussex)
Today, I was riding the train and someone farted. Everyone looked at me. People always blame farts on the fat guy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21981) - you deserved it (4359)
On 12/04/2012 at 11:04am - misc - by Banana (man) - Puerto Rico
Monday 20 May 2013
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