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paprikacha's favorite FMLs
by 613tanner / 05/19/2011 at 1:30am / Transportation
Today, I searched frantically for my glasses for ages. After giving up, I realised I could see perfectly. I had been wearing them the whole time and neither my mother nor my father told me because "it was far too funny" watching me yell "Where the fuck are they?" FML
by Kyle / 05/10/2011 at 6:48am / United Kingdom (London) / Miscellaneous
Today, I woke my husband up at 2am, screaming that there was a badger in our bedroom. We both screamed for a bit until he finally says, "What are we screaming about!?" I took a second look at the badger, and realized it was my four year old daughter with her blanket. FML
by BadgerSpirit / 04/27/2011 at 9:35am / United States (Washington) / Kids
by Scarlett / 04/26/2011 at 1:28pm / United States (Washington) / Intimacy
Today, my boyfriend tried to cure me of my snake phobia by buying one. When he took it out of the cage, it bit him. Now he's terrified of them too. Even worse, he dropped the snake, so it's now loose in our house. FML
by Anonymous / 03/28/2011 at 2:52pm / Macedonia (Struga) / Animals
Today, in an attempt to get my son to stop playing Call of Duty, I threw his Xbox controller out the window. He was so desperate, he followed it. His bedroom is on the second floor. My son has 3 broken ribs, and no future. FML
by failureparent / 03/20/2011 at 9:25pm / United States (California) / Geek
by hopeless / 02/26/2011 at 1:49am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
Today, all the staff in my company were forced to attend an evening Chippendale show. Everyone in my department managed to think of a good reason to escape while I failed and no other choice but to go. I'm the only guy. FML
by yamada / 02/25/2011 at 5:15am / Singapore / Work
by Anonymous / 02/24/2011 at 6:03pm / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous
Today, I went to my son's high school play. The moment I arrived at the auditorium, I shouted out his name to let him know I made it. Thinking I was a student, a teacher yelled, "SHUT UP AND SIT DOWN!" Scared out of my mind, I quickly obeyed, to mass giggling from the kids. FML
by Annie / 02/24/2011 at 1:39am / United States (Tennessee) / Kids
by failed / 02/23/2011 at 5:06am / Switzerland (Vaud) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 02/22/2011 at 10:21pm / United States / Love
by bob / 02/05/2011 at 7:02am / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, it's been six months since my husband and I have miscarried our daughter who we named Hana… 2Today, I discovered, after years of being grounded for losing my belongings, that I didn't actually… 3Today, eight tornados hit the town where I live. The only person who tried to get a hold of me and…