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pandamimo

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pandamimo
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 140
  • Number of comments : 5
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 12 posted

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pandamimo's favorite FMLs

Today, at college, I finally talked myself into confessing my feelings to a girl I really like. Her response was to threaten to sue me. For what, exactly? I have no goddamned idea. I just don't understand people anymore. FML

#20545151
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29172) - you deserved it (2639)

On 03/15/2013 at 6:43pm - love - by forever single, I guess (man) - United States

Today, I took my driver's test. I did everything flawlessly, but my examiner kept all but pissing his pants throughout. He yelled, "ARE YOU TRYING TO GET US KILLED?!" when I drove past a traffic light just as it was about to turn red. The road was almost empty. He failed me on the spot. FML

#20517994
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10911) - you deserved it (44121)

On 02/22/2013 at 8:47pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia

Today, I had to explain to my white girlfriend that dating me doesn't give her the right to call my mother the n-word. FML

#20507523
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36255) - you deserved it (8100)

On 02/14/2013 at 11:30pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my daughter had the words "Always classy, never trashy" tattooed across her lower back in crappy cursive lettering. She doesn't understand the irony. FML

#20400337
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28489) - you deserved it (2972)

On 12/15/2012 at 3:08am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my dog did something I had no idea he could do. He participated in an all-male three-way at the dog park. In front of everyone. FML

#20199452
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20872) - you deserved it (2172)

On 12/10/2012 at 7:04pm - animals - by MoreActionThanMe - United States

Today, my dad was teaching me how to drive. He told me that stop signs with white outlines are "optional." I ran through the next one I saw and got pulled over by a cop. My dad is making me pay the ticket for being "that stupid." Thanks dad. FML

#20129645
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10543) - you deserved it (34913)

On 10/23/2012 at 9:19am - money - by Dinger1992 - United States

Today, while making love to my wife, I let slip her sister's name. I don't think it would calm her down much if I told the truth: I was actually thinking of an ex girlfriend who shares the same name. FML

#16157723
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9267) - you deserved it (46753)

On 05/13/2011 at 1:08pm - intimacy - by scalmon - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, the rain was pouring really hard outside. I found this out when it started raining on me at 4 am inside my dorm room. Thanks college. FML

#13273746
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18653) - you deserved it (1574)

On 10/01/2010 at 6:04am - misc - by ohcollege - United States

Today, my boyfriend forgot our anniversary. But it's okay; I wasn't expecting anything after he forgot my birthday, Valentine's Day, and my name. FML

#12409274
327 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32095) - you deserved it (20403)

On 08/09/2010 at 10:38am - love - by Forgotten (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went on a date with a great vegan guy in my class. We went to a vegi-restaurant, I dutifully ate all the meatless dishes, but he seemed pissed about something, and other diners kept giving me angry looks. After we left, I realised I'd worn my leather jacket to the date. FML

#8634063
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10302) - you deserved it (35549)

On 02/25/2010 at 4:42am - love - by OmniVore (man) - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, I walked into Old Navy to buy myself a pair of jingle jammies. Save yourself the embarrassment: don't shake the jammies in the middle of the store to hear the jingling, because these jammies do not jingle. You'll just look like an idiot. FML

#6787004
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5302) - you deserved it (27366)

On 12/17/2009 at 12:07am - misc - by sarabalism (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I went to Disneyworld. I fell and hit my head while jumping up and down to see Ariel. I'm a 35 year old man. FML

#6461124
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9327) - you deserved it (36627)

On 11/26/2009 at 11:30am - misc - by disney - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I decided to take a personal day from class and e-mailed all of my profs saying I had flu symptoms. While standing in line at Starbucks later, someone behind me says "Glad you're feeling better. Hope you can attend class tomorrow, we'll discuss lying." It was my Ethics professor. FML

#5921538
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5092) - you deserved it (39650)

On 10/20/2009 at 10:15pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I realized that my coach doesn't close the door and the blinds to perform half-naked body checks (to make sure his team is in shape) on anyone else but me. FML

#5424616
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40564) - you deserved it (3947)

On 09/23/2009 at 7:28am - misc - by MaKaDa - United States (Texas)

Today, I was partnered with this really sexy guy for an audition. He says, "Am I really stuck with you? I can't even stand being seen with you in public!" I start cursing him out really loud, but then I realize that he's only reading the script. Everyone was staring, and he called me a crazy bitch. FML

#2445222
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10084) - you deserved it (60326)

On 05/30/2009 at 9:13pm - misc - by jazzyfizzle (woman) - United States (New York)



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